
As you all know, Ilona and Gordon are currently deep in the writing cave finishing Maggie 2. The cave door is closed. ASMR keyboard clatter can be heard faintly in the distance.
If you look at the homepage, you’ll see a new countdown clock to the release of This Kingdom Will Not Kill Me. Nineteen days and counting.
With Maggie arriving so soon, there will be an influx of fans to our ranks. New blood and ideas, fresh, innocent Horde recruits for us to corrupt into our Dushegub ways. Obviously, we cannot simply throw them into the middle of things without preparation. That would be irresponsible.
These are some of the field notes I’ve gathered after years of careful study. The list is not complete, and I will require your assistance to improve it.
- Devouring: goes without saying. The book is finished ideally within hours of release. Extra points if you manage to ask about the sequel on the same day.
- Character Adoption Program: main sponsored charity of the BDH. Any character who appears on page can be instantly adopted by the Horde. We will demand to know their entire life story, “Is there a scene about how …” emotional journey, and future romantic prospects. (Puffles4Ever. Klaus Klaus Klaus, barsa barsa barsa. Never forget!)
- Petition habits: already hinted at above, the BDH mobilization on request-protocol is famous fandoms over. Teasing us with characters? Jokes about books that don’t exist? We make them happen. Been there, done that, have the ebook, paperback and audio to prove it. Who’s laughing now?
- Rereading conspiracies: The first read is for enjoyment. The 24 subsequent rereads are for enjoyment and investigation. Why did Linus sneeze right there? Could it mean that he’s actually Augustine in disguise and what does Sergeant Teddy have to say about this? No such thing as “small detail from Chapter 3” and we all know it.
- Announcement Analysis: A casual announcement, cover reveal, or unassuming sentence in a blog post such as “we are working on something”. The Horde studies this information carefully. Rest assured, we’ll get to the bottom of what it really means. The rumour mill always grinds.
Please add your observations in the comments so we can continue expanding the newcomer guide.
For those wishing to determine their precise Horde alignment, the classification quiz is available below.


I am Team Chalant, but as I was reading the perfect description, I was secretly wondering if Mod R had only put one description in, so that we’d all be Team Chalant. Wouldn’t that be a hilarious April Fool’s day joke?
Character Adoption Program – I find myself always wondering about Naeemah and the story of her family.
That does sound like me, but no 😛 . There are 4 possible archetype answers, like the characters in SATC.
Team Dushegub for the win! What an unexpectedly delightful addition to my day. Love a good quiz ❤️
Team Dushegub and I thought I was Team Facts.
You are a member of Team Facts are King.
I try to be rational. Try being the operative word
Team “Team Facts Be Damned” FTW!
Team Dushegub 💪🏻💪🏻💃💃💪🏻💪🏻
We are victorious 😂😂😂
Team Dushegub! HORDE RULES!
I just read this post in my e-mail, just the pics chosen to illustrate the quiz were enough to send into conniptions. I’ve come to the blog to now take the quiz (several times if necessary, sometimes all answers are the right one, so the quiz needs to be done repeatedly if you’re only allowed one answer per question).
I’ll be back
First try got me into team Chalant. I feel recognized.
But there were a few questions where I hesitated, so tomorrow I’ll try again.
My solution to losing snippets (and others blog posts, I’m really sore about the literary aita disappearing !) to archiving is to print the post into pdf. I usually wait a couple or three days because it also prints the comments which are frankly added value… Now I just need to find that corner of the darkweb to see if I can get my greedy paws to a few lost posts
Yes! Team Facts be Damned calls you home! Let the conspiraciea begin! Bwahahahah!
Hmm, I wonder if the quiz is up to evaluate the chalantness/Dushegubness of the Horde as the w*it goes on? If we will ALL eventually b Team Dushegub by the end of March? Will HA/Mod. R know it’s time to medicinally drop snippets when our collective Dushegubness gets too high?
Do u want to discuss?
I’m officially quite challant. But, speaking of patience, I wondered if the next book in the Blood Heir series is permanently on hold. Will Julie’s story continue, perhaps in the Wilmington books? I was just rereading it with enjoyment.
Looking through the earlier comments, I see you already answered my question.
Team Chalant.
sure, 😉😘
I’ll take it.
I am Team Chalant. What a conspiracy. I’m not, I’m not, I’m NOT!
There will be rippercushions.
Facts be damned , pioneers leading the way. Go us ! Yeah.👍
Team Dushegub!
We make really cool Halloween ornaments!
Modr, you forgot the shipping😡, #Teammetalrose4evr, Karkun, Maland, we have opinions! Lots, and lots of ‘em.
We believe what we believe and stand by that belief! #TeamFactsbeDamned!
We need and dream of merch! Baha-Char here we come! We are fluffy and Chalant. We cannot wa*t and pat*ence be damned.
How do we deal with stress? Just pick any IA medium and it’ll get the job done! Kate your favorite? Start with Magic Bites! A little short will do ‘ya?, then pick up Silent Blade or The Inheritance 🥰. There’s nothing like getting immersed in a great read, and you are guaranteed that with Ilona Andrews! All Welcome to the BDH, be Chalant with us.
Wow! My result, Team Chalant, describes me perfectly. Freaky stuff …
I am relieved. ModR has declared that I am a member of Team Facts. But isn’t it fun to stir the pot once in a while???
Team Chalant was no surprise! Am I the only one who took 3/31 off so I could read Maggie😂? Inquiring minds want to know.
I couldn’t, but it’s the last day of school for easter holidays where I live (being an adult in tech school has it’s perks).
I won’t sleep that night, that’s for sure XD
I know I’ve taken this (or a version like this) before, but team dushgrub now. “Proposal. Do you wish to discuss?”
I will also accept new graphic audio releases or snippets in between new books…
Maggie is really pushing my reserve to wait for the library copy…
I was chalant, now i’m facts are King. fair ’nuff.
the scroll bar is really small right now and I want to read all the comments when I am less tired.
someone else probably got this, but I think there might need to be a House Andrews menagerie who’s who. Bonus points if they have bios announced as having two lies and a truth (intentionally backward). Tuna would make an excellent pillow model. 😀
Team Dushegub FTW
Team Chalant here!
I am currently on my *lost count* re-read/listen of the GA Hidden Legacy series. I needed a hug. this is my hug.
This! All of it!
Yay!
Team Facts!
Bern for the win 😉
Team Dushegub forever!
Need to know about the next INN keeper book!! Do you wish to discuss?
Still Team Dushegub, no surprises there! The only snippets I’ve been avoiding are Maggie, because I want to devour it whole and unspoiled 🤩
Puffles4Ever!!!
Team Dushagub?!!?
Hmmm.. Maybe I do get a little too singleminded about my reading.
But, Team Dushagub?
Come on!
Wonderful fun! Thanks.
Haha, I’m a Dushegub!
This book is *absolutely* going to be a short novella….
That “quiz’ was such fun. Every page brought a new chuckle. I can’t wait for the sequel! Squeeee! Lol
Have a great day. We are all p*tiently awaiting Maggie.
We from team ilonaversefanthwory are waiting for canon confirmation wellcome the new babie members for the horde.
Mod R can you please do a summary post of all of Gordon’s spoiler announcements from the past for the newcomers guide. I know Ilona has jokingly referenced his ability to spontaneously throw out a tidbit which then sends the horde into a frenzy. But I think the incident happened before I was a card carrying BDH member and I would love a recap of the event to chuckle over. Thank you
So many suggestions for ModR to fill up her non-existent time!
I really am all for the cloning (multiple times) of Team Andrews – more Team Andrews=more books, right?
And subsequently BDH would grow exponentially so we would need ModR clones to keep corralling them (us)…
Eagerly awaiting “This Kingdom”……but —What about Ada? The Tsuun will not just sit around waiting. Or maybe they will. There are sooo many irons in your 🔥 I don’t know how you manage to function. Your characters have a life of their own. I just picture the lot of them surrounding your brain and hammering 🔨 to come in (be released). Love the books.
Yaaaaaaasssss!!!!!!
What about Ada?????
I relate to her more than Maggie!
And that amazing new world is FASCINATING 💙💙💙💙
Please don’t forget about The Inheritance sequel 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Okay. But hear me out. Here’s Why Klaus *COULD* be a dragon.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because Mod R put the thought in our head and we hoped hard enough? Also dragons are hot. XP
But seriously, thank you for Wrangling the Horde, Mod R, and giving us more terrible and awesome ideas for the Authors to go “Whyyyyy” to (and helping to ensure that those who are bad at the curse words don’t drive the authors to live in a cave permanently, forever, never to grace us with their wit and words again.)
Team Chalant for the win!
“There’s no such thing as “small detail from Chapter 3” and we all know it.”
Ilona TOLD us this, when she pointed that as writer, every word counts. They never tease because…..well…..BDH! ‘Nuff said.
Any guide should include which words must b ***ed due their offensive nature here, eg: w*it, p*tience, etc.
Field note: Horde Easter Eggs
Magic Clams are a delicious treat
Of course Team Chalant, what else… XD
Boundaries and respect, so important to maintain (if you want something from someone)
Another question: Hugh 2? *innocent_emoji*
That’s what I said too! And yes, please to the last book in the missing parents story arc in Innkeeper Chronicles then Maud’s wedding, Klaus’s book followed by Cookie’s then Helen’s trilogy….. etc…
I find something in nearly every book, that could be continued… But I finally read Magic Tides and Magic Claims (yes, my shame), and I really want to know whats behind the “put down the cow”during the phone call XD
Hi !
I’m Team Chalant… but there are a lot of days yet in this countdown clock, no ???
Ah, still Chalant! Good to know I stick to my Team!
Facts are King!!
That was so much fun! So chalant!
Team Facts! We should get decoder rings and t-shirts!
I remain optimistic about Puffles. Someday it will come…
Team Chalant, of course. Outwardly calm, inside a passion that burns with the fire of a thousand alien suns. 😉
a language guide would be fun! I.e. a post on the language of the horde with links to the origin story or book. For example I somehow missed how chalant came up.
Plus, introcing new members to the glories of barsa barsa seems fun 😀
Team Dushegub… have officially descended to the dark side. Nom, nom, nom. More books! ALL the words! Ooooh, dark chocolate cookies! Devour!
Team Chalant ❤️😁
I am a proud member of Team Chalant
– Geallach Mong Rua
Team Facts be damned! I have not done the quiz.
Nope, I’m a Dushegub.
CREEEEK!! Team Dushegub Forever!!
I didn’t know Klaus was a dragon!? How did I not know this? When did this happen? How did this happen? I need to re-read the series to find this nugget. And research the blog … maybe it was a snippet … wait … if he’s a dragon AND an arbiter that would give him awesome dimension hopping powers while making him a perfect match for Arabella!!! When is this book being released!!!???
Love the quiz. Apparently, I’m part of the Team Facts are King group. Hm, that reminds me, do we get to see more of the Bear of Kamchatka? If he’s around the same age group as Arabella, their adult selves would probably cause lots of sparks. *lol*
Makes me wonder what Sgt. Teddy thinks about him? Also, it crossed my mind that if Sgt. Teddy ever decided to take his human friends camping, it’d be like going to visit home for him. Hehehehehe. Hm, and since he’s magically human aware, does this mean he can ‘communicate’ with animal mages at a higher level (maybe telepathically/empathically?) What does the Harrison family think about Sgt. Teddy?
Fun quiz!
Sorry if this is a repeat question for the 1 millionth time, but I can’t seem to find what happened to Julie’s series? I thought there were supposed to be three books? And I’m dying to know if she and Derek get together and if Derek is a First???
You forgot one thing on your list: Always be on the look out for things reminding you of the novels. Always be alert! For exemple, I live in Denmark and have just seen a van with the logo “Gastech” on it. I was driving, but succeeded taking a picture anyhow. Always prepared!
Well done, this is an important find.
Team Facts! I am Catalina (as much as I would prefer to be Nevada, I do recognize this fact). One minor quibble, now that it has been raised: Klaus might indeed be a dragon. We need to explore this. After all, we don’t know who was his father. I refuse to accept that he just some boring human. Also, we need more on Gerard. I personally think he walked over from the Edge series. Prove me wrong!
I’m a Dushegub, I think deep down I already knew that 😆
That was fun! Thank you!
I love it. I am on Team Dushegub!!!
this quiz reminded me of a very IMPORTANT fact I’d forgotten about ……….. leading to a very IMPORTANT question that needs to be asked ……… What HAPPENED to Hugh 2 ????
TOR surprise contracts for Maggie 1 & 2. Wise author beasts say a resounding YES when TOR knocks!
Oh I really like this! And it’s totally me in everyday life…
“You are a member of Team Facts are King.
An anchor in the hurricane of fandom chaos, the watchtower of rational thought, you were basically Catalina Baylor in another life. ”
But then again, that’s why I love reading fiction when I’m not working!
I’m catching up with weeks of blog posts and this was really fun!
Thanks for re-posting this! I took it previously, I believe it was new then. Like it, I was fairly new to HA. There were a couple of skipped questions as a result. I was found to be team (I cannot spell, please forgive me) dushygoob. I was a bit gobsmacked! I am a research nerd at heart. If my body would cooperate, I’d be off doing Important Psychological Research at some Important University Somewhere learning all there is to know about innate resilience and how to build upon it. As it is, the Mind is most willing, the body a wee bit compromised. We will overcome!
As you can safely hypothesize from the above data, I had expected to be team Facts are King! I can now state, with a larger sample size, with multiple measures over time, I am indeed, Facts are King (except when they aren’t.) We all contain multitudes. Also, all generalizations are false, including this one! (Attribution: a button ca 2004.)
Blessed be the author beasts & their continued health! TOR deadlines must be terrifying dushygoobs indeed! Please, from one professional to another, self care is necessary care! The deadline is meaningless if the content is subpar. You will only realize it & work far too hard to rectify it. Mindful moments are meaningful, even if the brief duration of brushing one’s teeth or petting a demanding cat. Throw your mind fully to the task. Worrying about things you cannot possibly do at the same time as brushing your teeth, bathing, or petting your adoring, loving, demanding fur baby costs you moments of peace, and gains almost nothing. Mindfulness need not last long to be rewarding.