I am stuck. I’m stuck, I’m stuck, I’m stuck. There is a problem that we need to fix in Maggie. I know where I’m going and I have no clue how to get there. I know I’m in trouble because I can’t even clearly articulate what the problem is. I just know that there is a problem. I feel it. It’s this amorphous knot in Chapter 10.
Ugh.
Yesterday after thinking about it way too hard I went into the bedroom and tried to tell Gordon about it. I made no sense and ended up doing an impression of a cat who hides their face in the pillow. Me and Tuna, two peas in a pod.
This is edit #4? 5? I lost count. We edited this so much even before we ever tried to sell it.
I saw a self-labeled hot take on a social network from another author with a long career, who stated that midlist struggles while bestsellers don’t. The idea is that life for bestselling authors is easy, smooth sailing.
We were NYT bestsellers with a book that had $15,000 advance split over the period of 18 months. How much marketing do you think we got, heh?
The creative struggle is the same, the professional anxiety is the same, the self-doubt is the same. The process of bringing idea to publication is the same. It takes the same amount of work as before, probably more, because there are higher expectations. We sell more, but that doesn’t mean that we always get the contracts we want or that the publisher falls over themselves to market our releases. On some books we had a lot of support, on some we had none, and once in a while I could swear the publisher actively attempted to sabotage the release, which is the point you call your agent and say things like, “What the hell is going on over there?”
In reality, no, nobody is sabotaging releases but sometimes the publishing team assigned to the book doesn’t coordinate and things fall like dominoes.
You can be a bestseller, sell 100,000 copies of the book in a year and still be a failure, because you didn’t meet the publisher’s anticipated sales volume. The pressure is crushing and you’re only as good as your last book. Having a long career as a bestselling author means constantly having to either top or reinvent yourself. But I can see how it would seem smooth sailing: bestseller authors avoid complaining in public because our audience expects us to be grateful and anything even remotely critical will be seen as punching down.
Writing is hard work. It’s hard for everyone across the board, the aspiring authors, the debuting authors, the midlist, the bestsellers, the household names. It’s just hard.
I watched this really interesting anime called So I’m a Spider, So What? This girl ends up in a fantasy world reincarnated as a spider. If you’re in the market for a unique anime, this is it. They do such interesting things with layered plot lines. The spider is absolutely hilarious and super cute.
It’s dubbed on Crunchyroll and the English voice acting is excellent, but I couldn’t find a clip of it so here is the sub version.
Poor Hiro. Every time she wins, a greater challenge comes along and she ends up with her butt literally on fire. One time only a head was left but she survived. She does not quit. I need the second season.
So if you’re sitting there today, frustrated, remember, we do not quit even when our butts are on fire.
Phew.
Okay. Once more into the breach. Maybe if I write this down in very simple terms, I can figure out how to fix it.
I’ve never been first…maybe this time?
Certified 🥇!
I shall send a picture of my certification to my daughter and then tell my husband to buy a lottery ticket!
Maybe don’t think of it as being stuck, but consider it a challenge to reframe the thread from another point of view or perspective. If you were, say, blocking this out as a live stage on scene, and had everyone standing around, what would that look like? How would you guide the actors around, what entrance/exit, how would you instruct the movements etc? What tool or random bit of luck/fate/karma might enter the story at this point to throw everything into chaos in a different direction. Sometimes it’s not the character that’s stuck and not the creative mind, but another idea that’s percolating somewhere beneath all the other layers that’s waiting for just the right moment to spark attention to a new avenue.
Hi Illona,
Solution to your problem, maybe… Get something to eat and do something monotonous while reviewing the emotion, motivation, and character development of chapter 10 in your head. Boring stuff works to focus me. I need three things going on at once to accomplish 1 thing. Hope it helps because I love your writing. 🙂
I love the honesty we always get in this blog.
It’s refreshing and inspiring.
Thank you.
I feel your “stuckness”. I teach 3rd grade. We’re in the 9th week of school and the class has not come together like usually happens. Everything takes too long: transitions, taking notes, reading passages, etc. I have a handful of students who come with a lot of baggage and their behaviors over-influence the class. We can’t get through our work. We all end up frustrated and irritable. It’s not working, so what to do. I’m puzzling over a few different possibilities, even doing a pretend “return to the first day of school” to see if giving us a do-over would help.
I feel you. This is where year-round school schedules can really save your sanity. I had a terrible 4th grade class that lost recess and lunch recess every day (with the exception of 3 individuals) because they just couldn’t get it together. Being “consistent” almost killed me because I needed the recess breaks more than they did, but just when I was about to cave, we went on a 6-week break.
When they came back, they were so well behaved it was like a different class, and whenever someone started to act out, someone would whisper yell, “Be quiet! Don’t make us lose recess!” If you could even get a 1 week break and treat it like a reset, hopefully most your kids would fall in line and ignore the instigators. Sending you much energy and inspiration!
Thank you for your understanding words. It’s hard when you get up tired, spend the day tired, and go to bed tired. Thanksgiving break can’t come soon enough.
Sorry the book isn’t cooperating. As you say, writing is hard. It’s work — not just staring off into the middle distance for a few minutes before the words begin to flow — as film would have us believe.
I usually try yelling at my writing. I’m sure you’ve tried this as well. It hasn’t worked for me . . . yet. I remain hopeful and refuse to give it up as a solution. Like Don Music from (the back in the day) Seseame Street. “No, no, no! That’s not the way it goes!”
This is where I’d love to put something insightful and helpful for the struggle, but the struggle is real and hard and sometimes there isn’t enough chocolate and why is through the only way out and * waves hands *.
Thanks, for sharing. It’s easy for us to forget how much work y’all put into all the things.
ha! I laughed out loud! I yell “no!” at my computer all the time. it doesn’t listen either, but it does allow me to send very politely but firmly worded emails to appropriate parties afterward😁
When your computer is misbehaving, try “Programmable toaster ovens! Do you hear me? Programmable toaster ovens!” It worked beautifully on one work computer I had for several years.
Yes, I’m a Bloom County fan. How could you tell?
Second
Guess not
Sorry for your problems, I would get overwhelmed at work and it seemed to overtake my waking and sleeping self. I felt tired, cranky and mad. So I did something mindless, gardening, long walks anything not work. Change your space, your schedule to get out of your head. So easy to say, hard to do. Unfortunately you are the problem. Peace
I have no amazing insights to offer. I cannot even imagine the pressure cooker and trying to be creative in such an environment.
I will just say, it sounds rough and I send you good vibes for creative solutions!
Thanks for doing your best so we can read the best!
Also sending good vibes, I’m really not a creative person so I can feel your struggle!
Hope you get the solution quickly!
I have 6 versions of Maggie, so…I’m afraid this might be edit 7?
Not sure that counts as helping 🫣😉
You’re right 😅. But if they’ve managed it 6 times, it bodes well for the 7th!
Your text doesn’t really across as smug or anything, but all I see is “neener neener neener, I’ve ready Maggie and you haven’t”.
It’s good to be ModR. 😉
#donthatemecauseImmoderating 🤣
My best Johnny Bravo impersonation
I was about to suggest opening it up to some of the BDH (MEMEMEME!) as I’m sure (yeah, right) we could help (crosses fingers behind back)…
ohh mamma
Numerology FTW!
Lucky #7!
Also this depends on how you count the edits . . . is it version 1, 2, 3, etc. Or 1.1, 1.2, 1.3. 2.1, 2.2, 2.3, 3.141592653589793238462643383279.
Yes 😂. Tbh, now that I look at it I think at least a couple versions are just me having a short part of it!
So as you were, back to 4-5!
3.141592653589793238462643383279
When you reealllyyy don’t want to roll over to edit #4.
Lol. Always love a good math joke.
Saw a comic strip yesterday where poor Pi was having to enter his name into a website: 3.141592653589793238462643383279
Hang in there! You’ll crack it eventually! All the positive cheering here!
Well, for what it is worth, I can’t say from experience for this kind of writing problem, but in graphic design I will say that my most useful solution has been to go back two or three steps from the problem. Because I often find that the big issue “here” was caused by a small, seemingly insignificant problem I introduced back “there”.
I learned this technique first in computer programming and math, but have found that it applies everywhere: cooking, sewing, knitting, gardening, etc.
My thought as well. She’s having a hard time fixing the problem because the problem didn’t originate in that chapter of the story. She has to start looking for the seeds of the plot issue in earlier chapters.
Maggie is, quite literally, built differently. Generally this approach works, she’s not general though 😅
If Maggie isn’t general, maybe she’s a sergeant?
***Sneaking out of here while the boo-hisses come out of the BDH.*** 😀
Admiralty 🤣
You needed a good laugh, Mod R. 😁
Can you draw a picture or explain it as you would to a cat? and its so frustrating to be stuck with writing
I feel for you. With the 3rd draft of my current Work in Progress, I got stuck for a solid MONTH on chapter one.
I’m sorry your butt is on fire. Stop, drop, and roll. A wool blanket works best because wool doesn’t burn easily. Not sure it will help with the writing though, unless it encourages you to nap, which allows you to dream the solution (this does happen sometimes).
I needed this today. not as a writer but in that everything worth it can be difficult thank you
I’m sorry you are stuck but thank you for the reminder that we all struggle with different things in our lives
Figuring out how to keep moving forward can be a challenge at times but I also believe in not giving up.
Butts on fire should just propel us forward! 😂
Many hugs and much love to you both. Give yourself some grace, tea, and desserts as needed.
This audience member does not expect you to be grateful that I buy and read your books.
I want you to be happy.
I realize, as well, you are critical of your own work. I can’t say “don’t do that”; you are who you are. That makes your books great.
Yes. This! Sing it sister – everything about writing, except for a reader telling you how much they loved the book – is hard. H.A.R.D. Sending you virtual patience, peace, and a chunk of magical inspiration. Being stuck is so frustrating – hang in there.
* Channeling Edna Mode (but a tad more sympathetically) *
“Go. Confront the problem! Fight! Win! And then call me when you get back, darling. I enjoy our visits.”
No capes! 🤣
Completely bulletproof…
And machine washable darling!
That’s a new feature.
No capes! this whole post is vibing with my work today, and i am an engineer. one of my mottos is “No capes!” – they’re bad for work/life balance, darling.
Yes. To all this.
Well that sucks! I am so sorry! Sending out thoughts of yummy tea, tasty nosh, fluffy blankie nap! Work is hard! No matter what you do and how much you love it! Work is hard in some or multiple aspects. I think it is supposed to be to a degree. I wish I could just fix it for you but that never seems to be the good option lol!
+1
When this happens to me, I take a break. A mindful hike, paying attention to the world around me, or, at least, to what the dog is interested in.
Oy vey! Encouraging words don’t seem to be in my skill-set. I’ll just say I’m sure you’ll get it done, and right.
I love “So, I’m a Spider, So What?” It is a fantastic anime. There are books available on Kindle if you can’t wait for the second season.
I am not creative, nor a writer. I am a tad bit ocd so when I have a problem I have to break it into parts, sometimes with visual aids. I’ve used post-it notes, index cards, and graphing paper with little cut out pieces of paper (couldn’t visualize how furniture would fit in room). Right now I’m picturing you having your family, pets included, acting out chapter 10 to help explain what the problem is. Won’t help you a bit, but I am enjoying employing my one bit of creativity to amuse myself.
Hey the cut out furniture/graph paper is a legit design technique. I use it whenever I’m moving or rearranging and you just came up with that out of your creative brain, good for you! I love the idea of acting it out. Could maybe someone film that and sneak it me, pretty please!!
Thank you so much for all your hard work!
Your writing is inspiring and meaningful!
We will be glad to read, whatever you write.
Suggestions for writers block:
– long hot shower
– walk in garden, feeling nature
– cooking
– cuddling pets
try writing it backward, “If I end up here what was the last thing that happened” rinse and repeat until like the little kid from the family circus comic you end up where you want to go (or come from in your world”
My husband and some love the spider and blob anime! It seems cute.
Im sorry this is a stuck moment. Take a breath, a break, a drink, or a walk; whatever you need to find the space for your brain to be free.
Wishing you wd-40, an epiphany, or unstuckness.
Good luck with that. It’s above 70 today so staining some 2x4s for the porch and, if I have time, stripping the bad paint off two handrails to stain them too. Temps are dropping!
Good luck getting unstuck. Maybe the Horde could help with getting you unstuck? Another set (or a lot of sets) of eyes may help. However, as everyone knows, the Horde does have opinions on everything. 😉
One thing that can help with creative stuckness is directed dreaming. A lot of our creativity comes from the subconscious anyway, so why not ask it for help? The way this works is when you go to bed, lie there and think about your plot issue until you drift off. Whatever you are last thinking about before sleep, that’s what your subconscious will grab onto, and when you wake up in the morning the solution will pop into your mind. I swear, it works!
The hoard is sorry. The hoard will love whatever your write. The hoard appreciates you always giving us your very best. Thank you for caring enough to torture yourself.
There is a light novel the anime is based on, and it’s a good four or five seasons in, it’s really incredible.
I read the novel as well, awesome.
Sending good thoughts your way 😊
Most people think I’m an optimist- I’m not! I’m a pessimist through and through. That said, cookies always help!
And remember, even when the powers that be have a deadline for you to fix stuff, the BDH would take it “as is” because we love you. We may have just started off loving your books, but thanks to the magic of Facebook, we get a glimpse into your lives and we love YOU. Put it in the bin and start back at version two, take the night off and knit and eat cookies, cuddle with Tuna and hide from the world, do what you need to do 🙂 Maggie will take whatever edits you give her and be happy.
Being a creative for a living is hard no matter what field it is. There are always a butt load of challenges commercially on top of the crushing weight of creating something out of nothing. Sometimes it’s easy to give the ideas life, annnd something it’s a struggle to manifest simple one idea, let alone a whole slew on a deadline.
Sending out some good energies to combat those creative blocks
There’s a great youtube of the Duke Women’s basketball coach talking about “it never gets easier. You just learn to handle hard better.” Basically – make that your goal. I dislike the logic (LOL), but its sound.
I am currently in a job at work (director level) and I am questioning whether I am even qualified or good at this job.
Your post – very timely. Thank you!
assuming you’re female based on the Suzi handle. did you know that women on average tend to think they need to fit more of the qualifications on a job ad than men? (did you know those lists are wish lists to a certain extent?)
remember that if we are in growth mode for our career every opportunity should be like a repotting – there should be room for our roots to expand. we learn and grow our best a step outside our comfort zone (not ten steps though!) it’s okay to feel comfortable and well situated in a position, but recognize that if you’re not pushing your comfort level you’re not going to grow your best 😀
“So if you’re sitting there today, frustrated, remember, we do not quit even when our butts are on fire.”
Aw, geez, I think I’m gonna have to drop everything, cross-stitch this on a sampler, and wear it on my face. That’s where I need it and that’s probably the safest place for it since my embroidery floss is not flame-retardant.
I just read a very straight and excellent comment from Karen Marie Moning. She didn’t make the Best Seller lists with her new series and explained some ins and outs. It was an excellent nuts and bolts post, and appreciated. When did you start writing the Chapter? Before or after your bout with Covid? Can Jeanine Frost give you an outside opinion? One of your kids? Can you step back and work further up and see if the answer is there? BTW, do you have a large pot?
I’m continually impressed with how much you seem to do daily!!! Edit a book, watch some anime, knit a sweater, take care of cute animals… do you ever sleep Ilona?
Sends you bunches of the hugs it sounds like you need right now.
I believe in you!
I’ve been stuck since Feb. I have the 1st act. I have the 3rd act. the middle is 6 paragraphs of sheer boredom. it’s so boring I have 2/3 of the next book done but the middle is unknown. and I’m doing scenes for the next book. I hate the middle. i describe it as ” they’re walking, they’re walking, A BATTLE! and …. they’re walking again.”
I sympathize. strongly.
if I ever figure out how to get the party from meeting to finale without the boring parts I’ll be so happy. I have a postit on my computer screen that says “write it badly” because surely I can fix it in edits. If I could just freaking write it out
Ok, what is the first thing one does when stuck? I’m not going to say anything you don’t already know, but sometimes you have to start at the end and work backwards? This is the outcome, is the what you expected? What was the expected outcome. Now work backwards. This should lead you to the knot, the you untangle 1 thread at a time. (I do troubleshooting for a living. I have to do this every day.) you can also walk away, read, take a walk…and you can look with fresh eyes!
writing us just like any other job that relays on fans like singers or artists. I live just south of Nashville so I know how very few musicians can top the charts. I’m sorry that your having such a hard time maybe take a break for an evening and Binge Apocathery Diaries then Binge read all 12 light novels…. one of my husband’s favorite things is reading the titles of animes. so funny. if that doesn’t work scream at your characters anD make them.tell you whats wonky.
I don’t look at it as complaining. Instead, I think that you are processing your emotions here with us, your loyal readers who are here for you to process whatever you like. You feel the pressure, so that we don’t have to. we will listen for days! No worries.
“We do not quit, even when our butts are on fire” is now going to by my new personal mantra right along with “we can do hard things.”
Thank you for this, and I hope the ideas are flowing better for you.
Perfect moral tee shirt quotes
After a few times reading Ilona’s quote, why does it sound like something a Marine (or any military) drill sergeant would say? Only change ‘butts’ to a different word, and I think we have it. 😀
I can hear Keelan saying something like this too. I’m re-reading Magic Claims (aka Clams) right now.
Have you tried checking the air in the tires? That’s what I ask myself when I’m stuck.
During a seminar on creativity, the speaker stated that the average 4year old scored around 90% in creative thinking because they had not learned all the “that won’t work” rules. He suggested, metaphorically, that the next time we couldn’t get the car to start we should try checking the air in the tires.
Good luck and thank you for all your hard work .
I’m sorry about the struggle. I think we all know those moments of frustration when things just aren’t clicking.
Now that a cool front has moved in to Texas and it’s no longer 99 freaking degrees in October, perhaps a walk? Sometimes it comes while I’m moving, and sometimes I dream it. Maybe let your subconscious out to play however it works for you.
We are all excited about Maggie, but I get that the pressure has to be enormous.
After reading the comments, I’ve decided that the BDH is like a bossy big sister. Giving advice to “fix” your issue, or, best of all, hugging you and telling you you’re the best and will find a way.
I’m sending the hug and knowledge that you will find a way.
lol I was thinking the same about the bosy big sister bit 🤣🤣 I think all the comments are out of love of course, and most humans have an innate desire to be helpful .. but to me some also come across a tadddd bit patronizing when Ilona is being wonderful for sharing what’s going on in their lives – their struggles included!
I have no advice, only that I know I’m going to be one of the first to read Maggie when it’s released and I know I’m going to love it because I love everything they write and I’m already emotionally attached! 😁
I’ve been trying to reword a professional email for the last hour, and using the rubber ducky technique has failed me. can’t imagine how much worse it is to deal with a frustrating knot like that and i hope your either able to carefully un-knot it or else snip away the offending snaggle and get it all seamless (or mostly so) in!
you’ve got this, i recommend a snack of choice and mindless random video game for an hour to give yourself a brain break.
read through it, remove all “I”s and “you”s. replace with “the project” or “the item” and flip flop the verb tenses to match. change any contentious events to passive tense. refute any incorrect statements in previous emails with “a correction to the previous email – this was the event, see attached email for record of original conversation/photo of notes from meeting” etc.
Basically, make it impersonal as all get out. it’s about some inanimate thing or concept and not you as an individual so remove yourself from the equation.
great suggestions, thanks!
you already have the tools and skills. you’ll figure it out. i say this as someone in a completely different field who has whined about many stupid broken models.
Remember to celebrate your victory when you work it out!
I agree with those who suggest letting your subconscious work on it overnight and I have also found that making methodical lists of all options or points helps to get your mind out of that tailspin.Doing something different which requires all your concentration also helps as does fresh air and exercise.I am in my 70s ,not an author or anything creative but have experienced that state of mind at many times over the years.
The last time you couldn’t figure your way out of a plot difficulty, something distracted you for about a week. I don’t recall what, but I remember thinking that it was more than important enough to ignore your writing for however long it took. And when you came back to us, you said you went over what you had to fix and the solution had been staring you in the face the whole time.
I hope something similar happens this time, though considering what you’ve been through over the past few years, maybe not TOO similar.
sending big hugs. What ever the problem, we believe in you. I can’t wait to read / meet ‘Maggie’. <3
Sorry can’t help but sending hugs
No advice, just hugs! We love you. <3
make Flow chart it could give you the unexpected branch. don’t stress we all love you.
Ilona,
I wish you the very best with this frustrating challenge.
On a completely unrelated topic that I hope gives you a happy smile, I met my gynecological oncologist today for my 4 1/2 week postoperative appointment (they got all the cancer cells 😊).
She told me that, based on my IA recommendation, she’s bought her first one for a trip to Houston next week. She loves the idea of both space vampires & space chickens. So, I predict a new BDH convert!
First IA book…
Congrats! Having good health news rocks.
I bought the first Innkeeper book in paperback for my big sister while visiting her and made her a fan.
Good work Ruth! And congratulations on your successful surgery. Hopefully your recovery continues uneventful, except for future book discussions.
Hehehehehe that was hilarious. I NEED to find it stat!
Sorry the edit is giving you fits! Hang in there, we have faith you two will work it out. I doubt that writing is ever an easy process, no matter how many best sellers you have under your belt.
Thank you so much for sharing this. The struggle is real.
Good luck figuring things out!
As a programmer this is achingly familiar. That one section of code that won’t behave, you tweak and tweak, change stuff around, scrap and rewrite, finally leave it be and have a 2am epiphany, or worse, mid conversation and a light bulb goes off and you hope you remember what it was when you can write it down. We won’t discuss how often I’ve written notes in crayon on the paper table mat at Italuan restaurants.
Keep banging away and don’t forget to occasionally just walk away for a bit!
I hesitate to offer advice, but I’m going to anyway, just in case it might help. What if you went back and re-read some earlier drafts? Maybe the issue is stemming from an earlier edit creating a problem?
To quote/paraphrase Red Green: “I’m pulling for you. We’re all in this together.”. You got this! 🤗
P.S. I saw a sticker that I just thought of which seems appropriate. “This too shall pass. It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.” Hope it brought a chuckle.
“So I’m a spider, so what” is also “Kumo desu ga nani ka”. The anime is great, but the manga goes far further with the plot. Lots more detail.
You are Bestseller for a reason. Everytime I do read your books I enjoy the difference all these struggles actually make: the fun and emotion I feel with your work.
Thank you!
When I get stuck in writing (mostly technical documentation, analysis, performance reviews, etc.), I listen to the soundtrack of Rainman. For some reason, the minimal voices, the beats, whatever, tends to help bring me in so I can focus and write.
stop working on it and take a break. if you become obsessed you won’t think clearly. take a walk hot bath go out for dinner. anything. just stop and let it go for a little while.
i really love your books. Be kind to yourself
Thank you for keeping it real with us.
Sending you love and hugs.
In my world, I also have a challenge where I can see that there is a problem and it is impacting multiple areas of my life, but I’m not sure how to/not ready to name it. (It is possibly life and perspective changing, but nothing dangerous or harmful.)
We will get through this – persistence, perseverance, and patience. I was not planning on the alliteration, but there you go.
We few, we happy few…..
Right there with you. Been stuck so long I’m growing moss. (JK)
Why don’t you put a section out to the BDH with the area you are referring to. Most of us are such avid readers of both your work and other authors, perhaps, between all of us, maybe we can make suggestions/comments that would help.
“we do not quit even when our butts are on fire.”
I might learn cross-touch just to put this on a pillow.
Olay, maybe just a T-shirt.
what’s the quote from Stephen King? something like “on a bad day I revise 2-3 times. on a good day, 7-8.”
So sorry you’re stuck but I know you’ll get through it and write something really great. Sometimes it works to do something else that takes your mind completely away from the issue. Take a break to refresh yourself and your mind. Then go back with a new look at the issue.
BTW, I made your Maple Mustard Chicken recipe last night and it was so easy and SO delicious. My husband loved it too.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Actually, I believe some publishers do deliberately sabotage a book…one of my other writers can’t write a new book in their series as the original publisher deliberately set a $12 price on the first paperback book of the series so no one would buy it and until they can get the rights back it’s impossible for them to continue the series (the others are priced normally). (The writer put this info on her blog to explain why she was disappointing everyone begging for a new book).
Linda, $12 on a paperback is pretty standard now. 🙂
I am not a writer, but I got stuck when writing a memo once and still remember the frustration. I finally asked a coworker to write a draft for me. I could edit/ fix their draft but not my own.
If you can’t get there from where you are, maybe start from somewhere else?
It will work out. Remember the issues with Ruby Fever and that book turned out so great.
This is the best blog post I’ve seen in a long time! If everything were easy nothing would be worth anything 🙂
It keeps me moving when my butt has been burnt too … hope you get through your knotted work!
Thank you for sharing honestly about the struggles. You and Gordon are fantastic writers and I’m thankful for your dedication!
Your post made me think of the jobs we do as passion and calling. Hopefully it makes ends meet (maybe better) but the calling itself is why we do it. There’s just some driven part of us that says, “this I must do.” Thanks for sharing both the rewards and the effort of your calling.
I loved that anime (So I’m a spider so what?) so much I ended up reading the light novels as well because I simply >had< to know what happened next. Very well done. I know you’ll figure out your knot. Take a break and do something completely different. It’ll probably hit you when you’re least expecting it.
Unfortunately, you have the curse of a job too well done. The expectations are enormous. I hope that the little spider will ease some of your pain. Thank you for working so hard to make our reading lives wonderful.
I’m absolutely nuts. Postulated.
Sometimes, when I know where I want to go I chart the path backwards. If I know that I want to go to Quebec by car I will start with the route home in Quebec.
Instead of asking myself “How do I get from here to there?”;I’ll ask “ Well, I’ve gotten here/there, backtracking what was my path?”
Please ignore the fool hollering from the cheap seats.
I think an author saying bestsellers never struggle is like the guy who lifts a car off someone and says ‘no sweat’, it is self aggrandizement knowing most writers swear it it. it is really easy to write a ton of words, I can write 10s of thousands of words easily,that my idol Phillip Seymour Hoffman in ‘Almost Famous’ would call gobbledygook….but to write something with quality? The only other easy writing is the ‘authors’ who have a team of ghost writers writing from their ‘inspiration’ .
The same thing applies in music. There is the myth that Mozart and Schubert never agonized over their music, they heard it and wrote it down, and it is hogwash, they sweated over it. mendelsohn wrote his octet when he was 16&supposedly he wrote it like it was trivial. the reality? he revised it 2 or 3 times before it be ame what it is ,over the years.
I’d tell you not to worry, that it will be great, but I know it won’t stick, have too much experience with a musician son!
i just finished the reading the inkeeper series again and I remember how much you guys sweated over it, and all I can say is it is just pure a blast,as usual you hit it a country mile.
I will say that one of my favorite authors posted in a “how to write” post that if a scene doesn’t make sense, one of the characters is acting out of character…hope your own advise applies
I have faith in you. good luck
Time for a little comfort food! Hugs to you!
You are very good at what you do. However the painful this moment is, just keep breathing.
As Hiro would say, “ Ganbatte”! I love the Spider anime too! You got this and your BDH is cheering you on 💯! Take it easy and know that we got your back. Thank you for working so hard for our much needed sanity break. We appreciate all that you do and love your work.
I love that Anime sooo much. The voice actor for the main character is what really sold it for me, she manages to convey so much emotion. She’s also the main character in Apothecary Diaries which was a fun mystery anime.
Consider yourself hugged, then given a cup of your favorite tea and a warm chocolate muffin (I just made them). I have confidence in you because you are an amazing author. I haven’t read anything by you that I haven’t liked or not purchased. I recommend your books all the time. Relax, finish your tea and imaginary muffin (wish I could bring one over but I am many states away from you) and know that your readers love you to pieces. Hope my pep talk helps.
Many years ago I read an article by Ed McBain (he wrote the 87th Precinct series, often credited as being the inspiration for Hill Street Blues) who said the same thing. He said having a best-selling book is not guarantee of another contract, you still have to hustle and scratch for the next. And the next story is not guaranteed either. It really doesn’t get easier.
I love to write, I don’t think I have a thick enough skin to do it professionally, but I love all of your posts about writing and the publishing industry.
That being said I felt your comment about “knowing where you want to go and not knowing how to get there” in my soul. It is every problem I’ve ever had with finishing a story.
I love that you share stuff like this with us. It’s good to know that professionals have the same issues and problems, albeit on a different scale.
My mom used to tell me to stand on my head when I was frustrated or stuck. Never worked. My author friend, Frank Tuttle, always, always said “Put a cow in the scene.” He knows I hate cows because I grew up on a ranch and I came BACK to help my parents and so I am still stuck on a desert ranch WITH COWS. I can say that honestly, his suggestion did help. Twice. Although I changed one of the cows to a gargoyle later.
Your problem sounds a bit trickier because you aren’t having trouble with creativity but rather with a plotline that isn’t working because some event or other is out of order or there isn’t an event, but more likely you have a piece of writing (event or plotline) that you absolutely love, but it isn’t working. As a fellow writer, I say, “good luck” because I do not think a cow is going to solve your problem. In my experience the only kind of cow that really helps a given problem is a juicy burger or steak. I know you will solve it, and in fact, turn it into something so much better than you even imagined, you will deserve a steak dinner. Just ask Gordon. I’m sure he’d be willing to fire up the grill, right now.
Ok, I understand that feeling, but you are putting to much pressure on yourself, go hiking!
We love you unconditionally, so take a break, take a breath and reset your brain.
doesn’t matter what publishing houses say, what you do is valuable and brings untold happyness to the world, always makes it better.
passive thinking. let it go for a day, and it’ll come back to you crystal clear in a shower
The struggle you are feeling/having is probably what makes y’all such good writers! I have been read y’all’s works for many years, own all the books, the ebooks, the audible versions as well. I am ever thankful you share your work!!
So true. I’ve taught Composition 101 to college freshmen, and trying to get them to understand that experienced writers of all types still get stuck. I’m working as a typist for a PhD candidate taking classes and working on his dissertation. He gets stuck. I have poems from years ago that stalled and are still stalled. I have brief vignettes of prose that are great starts to stories but they fizzled and I’m not that much of a prose writer. I’m sitting on a brilliant idea my late fiancé had that could be anything from a screenplay to a novel to the series of short stories that he envisioned. I’ve got some character descriptions for that, but it’s stalled because I’m not that kind of writer. On my own, an academic research paper is my forte after poetry. Poetry though stalls when there is no inspiration. It happens when it happens. If I manage to even self-publish a chapbook before I croak I’ll be good.
Now, with all that said. One of the things I tell my students when they get horribly stuck. Walk away. Yes, I know you’re on a deadline. Go do something else and let the back of your brain work on that amorphous knot in Chapter 10. Sometimes when we are doing something physical (knitting, crocheting, cross-stitching, walking, biking, running, etc.) the solution we were chasing pops up. Hang in there Ilona.
I have faith you will resolve your issue. It may take longer than you think it should. It may come as a slog, or as a blinding flash of inspiration. But I know you will solve it. Good luck!
While I’m in a different field I can relate to that feeling of stuckness, how attempts to fix it don’t always work. sending you kind regards, wishes, hopefully you get some r&r to help with the stress too!
Thank you for all the hard work you both do! I came to your series pretty late. I would see Magic Bites or another Kate book in a row of recommended titles, but had never taken the chance, since there were many others that I ended up not liking. Once I did, I was absolutely hooked! I love love love that series, and also the Graphic Audio versions. Amazing, and so fun! And the Innkeeper series was next. I wasn’t sure…then I loved loved loved that series, too. I recently tried out the Edge series. I know you said then that you would never write another book in that series, but I love George and Jack so much, I wish you would reconsider someday. Finally, I wasn’t sure about the Hidden Legacy series, but I trusted you, and now I’m in the middle of another stack of books that I love! Thank you again! I think you are my favorite authors (except for Tolkien who will always be #1 since my childhood). This is to say, you do amazing work! Hang in there, and I know this knot will unravel to your satisfaction. 🙂
I love love love your books. Especially the Innkeeper series. There is something about it that is just soothing to the soul. When I’m anxious or worried, I reread Innkeeper and I feel settled again. You have loyal followers because your work has something special about it. I can’t explain exactly what it is, but I’ve read pretty much every author in the genre and nothing compares. Just keep doing what you do.
I really like that you share the struggle and give a more balanced perspective on the life of full time authors.
If you feel the problem but can’t explain what it is, then the solution is also going to be a feeling thing. Likely there’s a darling to be murdered pre chapter 10. Good luck! 😉
HUGS!
((Hugs))
Sorry you are stuck.
Wishing you all the metaphorical pry bars, tow trucks, and WD-40 necessary to get unstuck.
I am sending a whole squad of bunny cat kittens via brainwaves to you, may they share their bacon. Good luck!
hope you get your groove back soon. I am sure when you fix it, it’ll be amazing even if you still want to improve it. 😉
You got this, breathe all will be well.
try a flow chart. I work for the State, everytime a confusing interpretation of the law came out, she would do a flow chart so we could understand what was going on. i’m so sad she retired last year. Good Luck
Milo the Chonk (Mr.MilotheChonk) on Facebook and Instagram is about the life struggles of Milo (cat), his human butlers, and roommates Poppy and Beckham. I find getting a little lost in his narrative helps. Especially when he tricks the dog into getting locked in his crate. Milo must be one of the most remarkable cats ever. Lol 😂 highly recommend.
I also love your books and very much appreciate the hard work. Here’s to lucky draft #7!!
We believe in you, you can do the thing.
The answer will come.
I hear you and empathize. The pressure in a creative endeavor is uniquely spirit and mind -grinding, as you literally manifest from the substance of yourself. ‘Bestselling’ is a label that only means that you are not likely to apply for government aid today. I’m writing this before reading the other comments but I’m hoping that this is a safe space for you to share the journey with your readers.
We are grateful.
peace
Hi Ilona,
Don’t worry: I’m just rereading Kate Daniel series with great pleasure, waiting for your next book!
… and I’m happy it takes some time and enjoy little details that I didn’t catch last time because I really wanted to go ahead…
Happy weekend 🥰
Bless you for your efforts and your humanity. I truly appreciate that you don’t rest on your laurels and phone it in bc I’ve read books like that from other Bestsellers and… wow. That or they got tired and didn’t want to finish the contract. Either way it’s bad. So bad. So thank you for your angst and caring. I’m sure you’ll figure it out to your satisfaction. Or, if your perfectionism is your personal demon and you can’t leave things alone that everyone else says are freaking fine, that’s when I smack my own hand and go, “Stop it, Ami! Is it good enough for the government to run? Yes? Then STOP and walk away!” We aren’t going to discuss how many times I’ve had that chat with myself over the years.
I want to second this comment. There are certain authors I’ve read and been sad that their writing never grows, they repeat things book after book and sometimes even copy stuff from previous books. When I pick up one of your books for the first or twentieth time I know there will be things to love, ponder and be amazed by. Each book, series and character is unique and a true gem.
Man, and I thought I had problems writing term papers. It was so hard to start, so hard to make it interesting, hard to stay accurate, hard to finish, hard to pick topics. I feel for you. Your writing is so great you have almost insurmountable odds to outdo yourselves. But, know that I appreciate the fact that you succeed every time. I’m always amazed at the new story, the new approach, the new feelings invoked. Especially in all your great series. You have to remain true to each character, remember so many details, and make it new at the same time. Thank you for being stuck, for staying with it, for succeeding anyway.
Hang on there. You will figure it out. Remember the fix you did for Catalina in Ruby Fever? You found the spot where you went wrong and you said the rewrite was easy. It’s a dropped stitch and you will find it and fix it without having to tear out rows and rows.
When I have an intractable problem. I review it as I go to sleep. When I wake up I do not always have an ereaker moment but I at least I am more confident about one option.
I have faith that you’ll come up with an answer! It will probably come at the strangest time like you’re eating dinner or at the grocery store, but it will come. Stories are unruly creatures and it’s like herding cats, but it will come together because your talent and strengths will get you there.
Take a walk. or better yet, get your mind off things by trying to take Tuna for a walk lol!!
it’s trite but true that moving your body gives your brain time to work in the background.
probably you have already tried all these things, so sending all the good vibes. lol
i recently had a book that I bought because the author did the book like a DM, and all major plot points has a die cast for how things would happen. A totally strange book, but I thought I’d suggest that you do something totally different to get over your hangup. throw the dice, ture the character into one of your pets and think how that pet would respond. Just do something different.
Go downtown and take a homeless person to Mickie Ds for lunch. something totally random that you either never do, or very seldom do.
I’m sure none of these ideas will help, but maybe just thinking about them would help.
I really don’t want you upset…
Wait! Perhaps that is the perfect thing!
Upset the Chapter!
Write a “new” chapter 10… A chapter without any rhyme or reason to the rest of the story.
Keep two characters and write it completely out of context. Write it as an existential crisis. Write it as a dream… write it so the problem, whatever it is, magically “pops”, like touching a soap bubble with a dry finger. Give it the “Star Trek” no-win scenario boot to the head!
Many years ago, I was babysitting a friend’s son. He was about 8 years old. (This was back when Minecr*ft was just taking off.) He was building a world in the game that was based on reality and it was not working the way he wanted.
He asked me about forts and castles from history, which is NOT in my wheelhouse. So we hunted up some of the details on the Web a.k.a., the Internet (note the Capitals “W” and “I” from that time). And, after falling down the rabbit hole for almost two hours, we discussed building techniques and how he could recreate it in the game software.
Again, he was frustrated by the lack of control he had over the building process and the time frame he had started the game with — he had to play the game longer and earn the upgrades, but he hadn’t figured that out yet. (I was no help in this arena because the last computer game I’d played, besides a free version of Mine Sweeper, was “Leather Goddesses of Phobos”.)
I suggested an alternative, “Why don’t you try to build what you want with your Legos, then repeat it in the game?” — I figured the legos would limit the design and structure of the castle fort he wanted to build which would then limit what he could translate into the digital world architecture.
Boy, was I wrong.
The Lego castle fort he built was incredible! Detailed and fancy decorations on the walls, doors and gates, plus rooms and towers with windows and a moat outside it, and an incredible “drawbridge” gate, all built with Lego bricks of various kinds and colors. All from his imagination after deciding what he wanted his “real” castle to look like based on what we discovered in photos and text.
But I was right, too.
He figured out how to build the base better so his walls could go higher and his castle fort bigger, stronger and better.
The Lego castle took him most of the day to build. By the time he was done, I think it dawned on him that building a similar structure in the game would take time and patience, as well as earning upgrades and discovering “easter eggs”.
I know you aren’t playing a game, but maybe veering off the path into something else will allow your brain to figure it out.
Maybe building it out of Legos will set your imagination free.
But, maybe I’m just full of it. I don’t know… I’m not an author.
So, I will just say, “Good luck and God speed.”
P.S. — I can’t hardly wait for the book!
❤️🔥I feel that way at the moment. Currently doing a professional pivot that I’m excited about but learning a new pipeline and building a portfolio from scratch has some moments where I literally cry from frustration. Channeling my inner Po, from Kung Fu Panda.
I am intelligent enough to put myself into your shoes and empathize with you. Hell I almost had a panic attack. Whew…..lol Sorry if I ever blew up at you! 🙂 Just being silly I know I never have and never will. Good luck and if you’re stuck just take a flight on your dragon. 🙂
“…remember, we do not quit even when our butts are on fire.” <3 <3 now taped on a notecard on my computer screen, thank you
The “So I’m a Spider, So What” light novels are also excellent.
I got hooked on the anime, and have read the entire series a couple of times while waiting for the next season. :-p
*Hugs!* and thank you for sharing a little glimpse of your struggles! People so often think that writing gets easier once you’ve “made it”, or that it’s easy if you’re “talented” but I’ve found that most things people assume are “easy” are a lot more difficult than they expect.
I’m a technical writer so I under the stress about being stuck and editing, particularly with multiple editors. When that happened I’d pull out one of your books to read or re-read. I’d also watch true crime documentaries. So after the break I was unstuck or I skipped to a new section to work on for a while, and then went back…computer software is a true gift for all writers (versus typewriters or gasp…writing by hand). I have full confidence in your amazing skills in writing awesome stories with fantastic characters…so don’t be so hard on yourself. And animal petting is a sure source of stress relief!
Thank you for this post. I needed the reminder that we don’t quit even when our hurts are on fire.
Grr.
I hope your problems solve easier and better than you expect.
Dear Ilona & Gordon,
BDH greatly appreciates the hard work, time, energy & sheer creativity you both put into each and every book & novella!
I’m a book dragon, devouring books constantly. It’s rare for me to reread a book or relisten to audiobook.
Exception to this is everything you two create. My go-to happy places are in the worlds you have introduced to BDH.
Thank you !