Wednesday word count starting: 107,142.
Wednesday word count ending: 106, 593.
The cuts are going to get deeper now, since we’ve reached the middle of the book. But then we have to add more to the finale. Bleah.
We’ve received an extremely long email from someone named Bill Turner. His email address is email@example.com. Mr. Turner’s email is a 4,000 word hate-filled rant about how awful Muslims are. It includes such gems as Muslims are “mentally mangled from birth” and is calling for a war on Islam. I think. There is a lot of misspellings and I didn’t read it too closely. Mr. Turner is not a spambot. He filled out the form on our website. Mr. Turner is permanently banned.
As is the policy of this blog, when we receive a particularly terrible email, we make it public. A quick Google search has shown that Mr. Turner engaged in this behavior previously on other sites, so we are happy to offer you the opportunity to preemptively block him.
You guys are superquick on the uptake with the last battle quote. How about this one? And don’t google, that’s cheating.
“Soldiers, no poor sap ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by being all that he can be. Damn the torpedoes, or give me death! Eternal vigilance is the price of duty. And, to the victors go the spoils. So remember: you are the best of the best of the few and the proud. So ask not what your country can do for you, only regret that you have but one life to live!”
How about that? Sergeant Heart would approve.
Sara T says
2000 odd words gone. Another 6000 to go! 🙁
No clue about this quote.
Colleen Whitley says
It is a mash-up of quotes. I think the torpedoes reference is from a naval commander, the “ask not…” is from Pres. Kennedy. The “being all that he can be” is paraphrased from an ad I remember seeing on tv, possibly armed forces recruitment? That or a Gillette ad. I seem to remember tanks rolling by along with this phrase. The “victor goes the spoils” is hard, is it a paraphrase from the Bible?
Maybe the whole thing is from an SNL sketch? Possibly involving a speech from some unfortunate politician? Some of the quotes are not merely mangled but mashed. The last phrase is an erroneous quotation of Patrick Henry; the original was “…only regret that I have but one life to give.”
Oops! Nathan Hale. Patrick Henry shows up earlier.
George C. Scott in the movie Patton said, No poor bastard (not sap) won a war for his country by dying. He won by making the other poor bastard die for his country. It was a stirring speech. I do not know if General Patton said those exact words, but it sounded good anyway.
Well, it’s a whole bunch of quotes from other sources strung together, but I didn’t recognize them used together, neither did my husband. So I did Google it, but I’m not going to say anything because, as you said, that’s cheating.
Here’s hoping the WCB keeps going until you get it down to squeak-in levels!
Nope. Quote is not in my memory banks. I would guess it is from a semi-parody of military operations – such as “Gomer Pyle, USMC”. It could possibly be from a game, also. I will be interested to know when the BDH identifies it. (I don’t get out much.)
You seem to be making progress. Good luck, and thank you for keeping us up to date.
My guess would have been something like McHale’s Navy, the one from the 90s/00s with Kelsey Grammar, but I remember watching that movie, and I don’t remember that diatribe.
It’s definitely a parody of war films, but neither Hot Shots and Hot Shots Part Deux was never intelligent enough to source those quotes. I can’t think of any other war parodies at the moment, unless it’s from Team America or something else I haven’t seen. I certainly don’t remember the line from Tropic Thunder, but now I’m fresh out of war parodies.
Patton for the Quote.
Dang, Patton was my guess too!
Deborah Armstrong says
Nope…General Patton was only partly responsible for the first line
Some of the lines are too recent for Patton.
Totally missed this quote, mainly because I did not see where it came from. Did google and was like, “oh, ok, totally missed that one” Good stumper of a quote!
No idea, but my wild guess would be Stripes?
And good luck with the word count battle, to say nothing of fighting the good fight against hate-mongers on the internet. Good for you!
I thought Stripes, too, but I think it’s later than that.
Sounds like Patton — wasn’t he the goat of his West Point class? It has the appropriate mish mash of military “sound bites” of jingoism to reflect his speech style (as dramatized by George C. Scott).
Was that the Bill Murray bit from Stripes?
Ohhhhh, I vote for this one! Since the quote contains Patton, Nathan Hale, Commodore Perry or Farragut?, an old Army ad jingle, Andrew Jackson, and JFK to name a few. (I promise I looked nothing up regarding those — it’s all from memory.) It’s when he’s giving a pep talk at graduation from basic or before their final graduation exercise?
Courtney Mincy says
Gotta be a military comedy.
I didn’t quite realize speech salad was a thing.
Ooo… that gave me the worst idea for neural net work… (Hm… rhythm is such a thing, though…)
So, I was just chatting with Janelle Shane (of neural network knitting fame, as well as a lot of other cool neural network projects) and she’s up for taking it on, if we can pull together enough material. I am volunteering to put out a call and curate the collection*, so this is kind of a pre-heads up? I need to finish the current draft before I write a real call for submissions, but it’d be great to start remember where all those cool rousing speeches are, both fictional, and historical. (They don’t have to literally be “before battle” but… something like.) I’ll try to get the project description written before bed, but if too much brain numb sets in (I’m down to materials list, references, and proofreading, which is pretty brain number) it might be over breakfast.
This blog is the official inspiration for the project, though I think the call will go out broadly – 10,000 words of speeches aren’t going to find themselves 🙂
* I should be done with the current manuscript soon, and this sounds silly and fun, which I could use!
Sounds like something General Patton would say, but he was Army, not a Marine. Don’t know will have to Google lol. But won’t post the answer cause that’s cheating….lol
Lol I had no idea either so I googled it because I had to know. I won’t say it though. Good luck with the cuts
I have no idea about the quote, but I wanted to thank you for not listening to that individual’s misunderstandings of Muslims.
Mary Cruickshank-Peed says
I thought Major Payne, but was wrong… it’s certainly a bunch of cliche and random quotes strung together.
John McAdams says
Great quote! It was hilarious in the movie. Good luck on the word count, too bad you can’t just change font size and call it a day. I do know that you will get it done and that it will be an amazing read!
I just watched this last week and the last quote was the only one I recognized. ?
I think this one is the winner. If you look really close at the soldier on the far right side of the image, you’ll see his hands curved in the standard doll pose. Or at least, that soldier looks more doll-like than the soldiers on the left side of the picture.
Oh! It’s the commander guy from that army action figures movie! What the heck was that called????
Quote: Is this Small Soldiers?? I’m not 100% but I love that movie…
THAT’S IT!!!! Thank you, that was going to bother me all day!
I think the guy who voiced that character was the head soldier guy from Avatar. Not positive, but the action figure close-up looks a lot like the actor, too. I think that actor died within the past year.
Kennedy used the quote in a famous speech but he lifted it from someone else, can’t remember who. Patrick Henry, maybe?
Good luck with the cutting.
As for Bill Turner, what would posses him to send you guys that drivel? If he knew you, he would know that would be unacceptable. Unless you are on some list or other. It’s just so random.
No, this dude filled out the reader form on the website. Mind boggles.
There’s a lot of undiagnosed dementia and disorders out there. That is all I’m going to say about that, except that even a diagnosis doesn’t preempt First Amendment rights – his to express, ours to block.
And here I thought Bill Turner was a rebellious engineer from Alioth who focused on Plasma Accelerators…
Real life is so much more disappointing.
It does sound a lot like Bill Murray’s style of pontification.
Hey! Bill Turner sent me a DM a year ago because I’m so lucky.? I’ve never blocked someone so fast.
This WCB is turning into a war. I’d almost expect one of those old timey correspondents wearing a helmet, crouched in the brush: “…it’s been hundreds today. A brutal confrontation. The horror. Such loss. Our country grieves.”
I’m just gonna throw this out: Kelley’s Heroes?? I realize it’s ancient but it has that same kind of humor.
Wes D says
Was it from tropic thunder?
Sara T says
I LOVE that movie!!
“We can probably get it below 105K and be squeak by, but we would like to get as close as we can to the goal.”~ IA
You are close to the squeak :). *clap* Perfection is the goal, but a win is a win whether by one point or 5000. And the stress is significantly reduced. Plus material added to store for next Baylor tale. So trim the topiary.
Of course, all quotes recognized, but together??? (Googled and don’t feel so bad. *lol*)
Poor Mr Turner. My mama used to say: there is no cure for stupidity, and most people don’t even try. Which is not an excuse to let disease run rampant.
Have a good day! Spring is here!
OOps. Paw slipped.
Your mom is great! No cure for stupidity indeed.
Omg I love that quote. Kudos to your mom?????
An author who was my favorite author several years ago, but has now dropped in the the rankings just put out her latest book. She was auto buy for me, but I have slowly stopped auto buying some of her series, because they have gotten too dark, the alpha males crossing lines to abuse, and the strong female leads suddenly becoming become weak after falling for the hero, etc.
I get her latest book and I swear half the book is the hero thinking how the heroine is the bravest person he’s met and the heroine thinking how incredibly sexy the hero is. I’m only halfway in over a week later and I have a very bad habit of finishing a book in one day if it’s awesome. I keep thinking I wish the the authorlords could cut their words from her book and keep the words in Sapphire Flames. Last night I noticed I was skipping whole paragraphs and the book still made sense. Her next book will not be pre-ordered.
If you’ve not written a review, you should. It might shake her world view enough to take a long look at what she’s producing. Of course, maybe not, too.
Is it the Marriage Raffle series? I usually don’t read that stuff but it showed up in my FB feed. Quick reads but meh. Too many errors that I find annoying. She says she has ARC reader but I guess they don’t edit for kindle will finish the series but won’t read others.
The purpose of a review should be to inform prospective readers, so do that, by all means. Authors ought to ignore most reviews IMO. They have editors and beta readers for that. I have seen an author take reviews into account, and it resulted in dumbed-down books in that case – every little thing spelled out so no one could misunderstand. No doubt the negative reviewers were thrilled. I wasn’t. I enjoy reading between the lines and looking underneath the words.
@Toni, no it’s a NYT best selling author who has been writing PNR books for years. I am going to go back and read one of her older books and see if my taste has just matured or her writing has changed that much. I think it is a combination, because some of the reviews have complained about things that bother me. This book feels like she had to add words to make the book long enough for her contract.
I don’t tend to leave reviews, I think their are other’s who are better at that, but I plan to on this one when I finally finish. I doubt she reads them, but think someone finally got through to her on the alpha turning to abuse. In this book the hero is one of nicest she’s written in years.
Okay, I am not a movie person, haven’t been to the theatre in years. So my guesses would be a world ending action type movie or video game movie. Like Avengers, Pacific Rim or that Adam Sandler one.
Good luck with continuing cuts may they go smoothly
Kelly Burnley says
For some reason I’m thinking from the movie, forest gump…. I have no idea why lol
I was thinking of Tommy Lee Jones’ voice when I was reading that quote and wondering why, and as I was scrolling down the comments it all clicked into place with the Small Soldiers comment 🙂
Good Luck with axing some more of those words xx
Patricia Schlorke says
I’m not even going to guess the movie quote. I usually don’t watch “war” movies since they remind me too much of what my brother (colonel in the Army when up for duty; family doctor in civilian life) went (and goes) through. The last “war” movie I watched was Patton with George C. Scott.
And now a moment of silence for all the words that were and will be slashed out of the book…. Ok silence is over. I am wondering if you guys are listening to Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust”?
As to the e-mail…what the heck?! I don’t blame you for banning the *bleeping* person (you can put in whatever you want for the bleeping). I mentioned in Nalini Singh’s blog, after she posted about what happened in Christchurch, New Zealand, we all need to stand together no matter what we believe and no matter where we are in the world.
Nes Maret says
William B says
My vote is for Bill Murray in Stripes.
Cherylanne Farley says
Random thoughts. We are also living thru the Devin sues cow Twitter nonsense. Serious question from historian. We can look back at other groups and see evidence of their thinking pathways by their actions writings etc. The current group like your banned dude confuse me. What is their point? Is it all just for attention no publicity is bad publicity? Are they hustling for money or spon con deals. Do they just public lance these awful boils of hate to live? Sorry. Rainy day super moon influenced rant I guess. Back to burn for me. Again.
I think that as humans we seek purpose. A goal. Some idea that gives our life greater meaning if we dedicate ourselves to it. Sometimes we don’t know what that goal is, and we instead find a leader to follow. In the absence of the leader or a goal, we look for a vile enemy to fight, because fighting that enemy will make us the good guys. It’s probably some annoying survival mechanism similar to the one that induces kids to watch scary movies.
We don’t really have a clearly defined enemy right now, akin to Nazi Regime in Germany during WWII or USSR during cold war, so people who are lost latch on to any cause they can find: gays, Muslims, immigrants, medical professionals who try to vaccinate children. There is no rationale to their actions. They are true believers, dedicate to their fight, and it’s very difficult to persuade them to keep an open mind.
Some people can only define their tribe by who is not in it (vs. who is in it). Some people require an Other. And that is the beginning of fear and hate.
Someone in my family watched a documentary on flat earth believers. He said that they tried to scientifically prove that the earth was flat. Every time they got a result that proved them wrong, they claimed wrong results and redid the experiment. They finally gave up as they kept getting “faulty” results. A psychologist stated what IA said. An open mind makes them a pariah in their society, and takes away their stability of life. That is the same reason a beaten wife stays with her husband. ( sorry, off topic, kinda) .
You cannot cannot change the world view of someone like that guy. They will not accept any other way or point of view. I hope he does not get the idea to “Take things in his own hands”
Cheryl M says
Not sure on that particular string of quotes, I know them individually, but strung together? No. I’m liking the Stripes guesses, but that’s because I like the movie.
Hooray for the block! Thanks for the heads up as to who it is. People like that have no place in my life.
Enjoy the first few days of Spring!
I think this quote is from Small Soldiers. Whether I’m wrong our right doesn’t change the fact that it’s a brilliant smash up of some great military quotes.
Re: your quote. Okay, this is the part where my lack of story-telling skills comes into play, and I’m probably about to slaughter this story completely but here goes…
The only “damn the torpedoes” quote I know of came from an admiral (Ferragut?) during the Civil War. When he and his fleet approached Mobile Bay, they found a bunch of Confederate boats waiting for them along with a whole bunch of “torpedoes” which I think are more like the modern version of depth charges only they’re tied into place. One of the boats sank and when the other ships in his fleet refused to keep going, he said, “Damn the torpedoes, or give me death!”
Or something like that.
And no, I swear I did not google this today. You recommended a book, “The Kingpin of Camelot” by Cassandra Gannon, on your website a few months ago, and the author used this quote in it a couple of times, so I googled it back then and took notes. =o)
And if I’m wrong, I hope my botch of a story was good for a few laughs.
Deborah Armstrong says
Actually, he said “Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!”
The “give me death” bit comes from Patrick Henry…he was ranting in Congress, back in the Revolutionary war days…some poor fool mentioned the possibility of sueing for peace, and got Mr. Henry in his face for several minutes, concluding with “Give me liberty, or give me death!”
Jenette Hendricks says
See? I knew I’d screw it up. Thanks for clarifying. =o) Also, I’m going to have to look up the Patrick Henry story now. That’s a new one for me.
David Farragut, first U.S. admiral of the navy, at the battle of Mobile Bay during the Civil War, said something to the effect of, “Damn the torpedoes, full steam ahead!” Of course, from what I understand, “torpedoes,” as used in the Civil War, were more akin to what we would call mines today. Apparently, the Confederate forces mined Mobile Bay in an attempt to keep the Union out. It didn’t work.
The rest of the quote I’m unsure about. “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country. ” is JFK, I believe. “No soldier ever won a war by dying for his country, but by making some other poor bastard die for his.” is from General Patton, I believe.
The rest of it, I can’t place at the moment.
janine orlando says
That quote is from one of my children’s favorite movies “Small Soldiers” I’ve only seen it 800 times. Thankfully they grew up before “Frozen” came out.
Please. My 27yo insisted we watch Frozen with her, and sings “Let It Go” regularly. that is the only time WE watched it, but her count is rather higher.
When there was all the angst over “Let It Go”, I was confused, having not yet seen “Frozen”, but had worked tech for a production of “The Full Monty” where there is also a song called “Let It Go”….could not figure out how kids were singing THAT song….was relieved to find out that it was a totally different song!!
Ok I googled it. How did I miss that gem? Going to have to stream it now and giggle my way thru an evening. Thanks for the fun quote!
Hope you’re both keeping your spirits intact through the cutting.
I get to read your wonderful books, and then I get to read or see other great books or movies. I remember when you recommended “Guardians of the Galaxy. “ And I love it and the music.
I never watched small soldiers, have to check it out.
Yea on the word count. Love the snippets.
Can’t believe the horrible post from such a deranged man .. There are some awful, dangerous people and you have to be so careful on the net.
I was so upset about the mosque shootings in New Zelandthat I sent an email expressing my sadness and support to Nalini Singh. And she sent me an email back thanking me. I was so touched.
We have to support one another and appreciate all the positive things in our lives. Like family, friends and pets . And I think the BDH and your posts are such a positive part of my life. I feel that I have friends all over the world.
Thank you , and thanks to everyone who reads and loves your books.
Brittany V. says
Do you guys have a designated work time during the day?
Hmmm……I think this is a mish-mash quote from Men in Black, but not totally sure about that one.
This is fun!
Its an animated movie with like army toys, Tommy Lee Jones does some of the voice work. I can’t recall the name but it also has a quote that goes something like “I love the smell of polyurethane in the morning!”
It sounds like something John Wayne would say in one of his movies such as Tora Tora Tora? Yeah I love to watch old World War II movies. That doesn’t make me a war monger just a history buff.
Nicki Garvey says
SMALL SOLDIERS! I LOVED THAT MOVIE WHEN I WAS A KID!!!!
If it is from Small Soldiers the picture at the top of the blog post matches perfectly ?. When I first saw it something look closer. Then when I realized what my brain was trying to tell me l thought, “Oh someone had fun with some Army Men!”
Awesome work with the quote! Small Soldiers is one of my favorite movies, watched it 100s of times with my daughter when she was growing up.
I have the best image of watching my (then) angelic-looking eight-year old bellowing out Chip Hazard quotes during a water fight at my in-laws… their faces were priceless. Thanks for reminding me!
I have an unfair advantage. My brother is a fan of Small Soldiers. I have seen this seen so many times. He is currently trying to build a figurine that’s true to the movie of Chip Hazard. Which is apparently very hard. His wife is very understanding of this hobby.
I’m not joking
Kay Edgar says
It’s a shame you can’t sell the original word count as an ebook after you have published the shortened version.
Also sounds like Turner is drinking water with lead in it.
Without being too mathy it looks like your cutting about 1,000 words a day. 2 more days would put you at about 104K, could you slide that by? Since Janiene said the last quarter was uncuttable, you are in a sticky place.
Mr Turner rantings hit far to close to home.
I haven’t seen nz so united since the earthquakes, the a-hole (who sits on the same spectrum of hatred as bill turner) failed spectacularly at driving the country apart.
I think it hit us all hard. We are a small country far from everywhere, it was unexpected.
The whole countries reaction to this terrorist attack has been amazing. The PM has shown her strength and compassion in the aftermath of such tragedy. She is amazing.
I hope this unity lasts.
Off topic, but a general head’s up to all you Facebook users…
Why the hell would that mofo email you guys that shit? I’ve been pretty good with keeping up with your blog posts and don’t recall reading anything about religion or what happened in New Zealand. That was random AF and like, what would possess anyone to write that shit? Is it because of Kate’s ethnicity? It’s just so bizarre. I mean, did they expect you to agree with them? Because lulz, they must not know you guys.
On a brighter note, have you guys watched “Love, Death, & Robots” on Netflix yet? I finally watched it a couple of nights ago and damnnn it’s good. Especially loved the episode based on Ken Liu’s short, “Good Hunting”. Which lead to me wondering about the world of Ilona Andrews adapted to screen, but animated instead of live action.
My brother recommended “Love, Death & Robots” too. I am not on Netflix tho.
Ask to use his account to watch? The episodes run between 7-15 minutes each and there are less than a dozen. You won’t block up his account for long. I mean what are brothers for after all ?
No doubt he expected to have it posted, so others could be influenced by his “truth” and join him. At the very least, he’d get a reply, which he could use to further promote his agenda. Any publicity is better than no publicity.
The PM of New Zealand is right. Deny these bigots the notoriety they crave. You won’t change them, so keep them from poisoning other minds if you can.
A ban is the only way to “reply” to this.
Bravo – and thank you.
I was wondering why all the pics I’ve seen of the murderer had his face pixelated. This makes perfect sense.
Chip Hazard from Small Soldiers
Hey, folks, good going!
I really, TRULY appreciate your efforts and hard slogging.
I’m re-reading the KD series … honestly, it’s good – but you guys really have improved over the years. I’m loving the characterization so much more in your recent series. More useful / interesting character development, more character interactions – less reliance on the (gawk/awful) smell of things and really awful scenarios (awful in terms of what the character is experiencing, NOT what you’re writing – which is just fine) – and now a lot more evolution of the multiple character interactions; so much juicier!
And you’re still keeping up the pace as action novels. (As in, this is not “Pride and Prejudice.”)
This is a hard skill to hone, I’ve so enjoyed what you’ve done, and am very much looking forward to this one coming out.
Hang in there!
PS – Hope Gordon’s feeling better post-root-canal. Not fun. The end result is SO worth it, though!
My favourite quote
“At 2 o’clock in the morning real men drink coffee. Black.”
It kinda sounds like the quote from renaissance man ..when the solider delivers his monologue about hamlet.
But I’m not sure!
Judy B says
Always take an action figure fishing with you.
I like what you did there I won’t give it away either 😉
Lmao. I love that!
Margaret R says
Now I want to take action figures everywhere! This is awesome.
Steve Lucas says
I am unsure about the quote but I feel sad knowing you must cut down the book. I know very selfish of me and you have good reasons but still sad face. When ever I reread the edge series I love how big the second book is BAYOU MOON
Ps. I wish they could all be so big or bigger 🙂 (ya still selfish of me)
Thanks for your hard work My heart and well wishes are with you both.
Wendy S says
It looks like a compilation of all the war quotes ever said from the 20th century. “Damn the torpedoes “ is one quote from WW2. “ Ask not what your country can do for you “ is from President Kennedy’s acceptance speech when he was sworn in, right? Love that one. And it is supposed to be “ Give me liberty or give me death!” by was that Benedict Arnold? Anyway it would take another page to identify them all!!
Wendy S says
Oops. Benedict Arnold was the one who said that he regretted “only having one life to live!”
Robert I. Katz says
That was Nathan Hale.
Damn the torpedoes is actually from the civil war. Admiral Farragut
Joe Healey says
And the “torpedoes” that Admiral Farragut was damning were what we would consider underwater mines.
“Give me liberty or give me death” was originally attributed to Patrick Henry. He’s an ancestor of mine, so I definitely know that one. ?
Yeah my mind went straight to Patrick Henry for the give me liberty or death one and I googled to make sure. Don’t know who the other guys are.
Is this from a movie, like Stripes or something? I can totyimagine Bill Murray trying to pump people with a slightly meandering stream of quotes.
Wendy S says
I bet you’re right. I’m sure I missed the movie!
It’s a movie but not one of those
Amy Ann says
It is from small solders movie. Yes, it is a mash up of quotes!
Mmm I think I will just go for a picture so others can guess too
Agree eith you
Hmmm I never saw the third one
Movie? Like Platoon?
Robbed, we are being genius-word robbed by editors!
I would have had to google, so I won’t comment on the quote.
Sorry you have had to deal with the Turner situation. Thanks for the warning; I have blocked him.
Bill G says
I’m sorry to hear that you get individuals passing off such garbage to you. OTOH, since I have to acknowledge that I, myself, am a touch odd, I do like to occasionally see proof that I’m not one of the outliers; there are some real ravers out there.
I recognize some pieces of that, from a variety of sources and times. If someone has put it together and spewed it out I’d suggest a drug test. (In my younger days, I’d have said that I wanted some of what they’d taken.)
Meanwhile, here’s what I make of the words.
” …won it by making some other poor sap die for his country”. Patton, recited by George C. Scott in the film of that name.
Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead was from, I believe, the Spanish-American war and a battle in Manila Harbor. The ‘torpedoes’ of the time were mines.
‘Be all that you can be’ was an Army recruiting slogan.
“Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom”. Drat, I’m drawing a blank. American Revolutionary type.
“And, to the victors go the spoils. So remember: you are the best of the best of the few and the proud. ” I can’t sort that out, other than ‘The few, the proud, the Marines’, another recruiting slogan.
“I regret that I have but one life to give for my country”. Nathan Hale, before being hanged by the British.
Bill G says
Wrong battle; curses!
‘to the victors go the spoils’ is from our own genocidal past president, Andrew Jackson.
Pam M. says
Oh I think it was Patton for the quote. I’m sorry you’re having to cut so much because it’s all good. I can’t wait to read it anyway. I love your writing!!
Reading about how you are forced to butcher your own work actually causes me almost physical pain. I do hope you have a copy of the original and that you will publish it once Avon has gone out of business for screwing over their readers.
Jean-ann Stump says
This reminds me of the speech in Magic Burns. I love that speech.
Wait… who has time for a 4,000 word rant? WHO HAS TIME?! I have papers to grade and boxes to pack and OMG A MIDDLE SCHOOLER JUST DID SOMETHING STUPID AGAIN! *lights hair on fire*
Nice! I’m guessing crazy ranters need something to rant about. But yeah, anybody who has a life ain’t got no time for that…..
Yeah a 4K hate rant is kind of,,, well, extremely scary. If someone has that much hate in them it’s probably good for them to get it ou, I guess, maybe. But who wants to be subjected to that?
IA has more fortitude than I do. I just delete stuff like that as soon as I figure out where it is going. That guy need some serious therapy.
Hah!! I knew I had heard that before. Did nobody see the picture above??? It was an awesome movie, I loved it! <3
Also, I wondered, couldn’t the publisher just charge more for more pages to the book? I’d pay!!
I’m with this idea.
+1,000,000! It’s probably some complicated contract thing though.
Robin Williams in Toys?
Small Soldiers! Though I guessed this through the pics in the comments section.
Major Chip Hazard from Small Soldiers
Well that was fun reading where you all think the quotes come from ,I agree with the compilation….but won’t revel even under the pressure of a Breaker Prime !
There is so much hate and racism and homophobia and just plain bullshit out there,then again on the brigh5 side you can always us that person as a villain…not the poor vileger farmer kind lol……
Happy Trails as par usual to you all.
Gloria Magid says
I’m guessing it’s from Patton. Will google after this, but it sounds like him.
Kelly Jacobs says
My husband only had to hear the 1st sentence to assure me this is a quote from General Patton.
I was clueless, but not like Bill Turner ->the Banned.
Just slayed a governmental dragon. My brother-inlaw passed away in 2007 from spinal cancer. My sister transferred her property from the two of them to herself in 2008. Even though she was a lawyer she disliked doing land law so she was a little bit unsure she had filled out the forms correctly. Yesterday she had to go online to claim her exemption from the City of Vancouver’s speculation tax only to discover that the City’s records still have my brother-inlaw showing as an owner on the property. And unfortunately each owner must apply for the exemption. So I come home last night to a panic email from my sister. Today, as I work for a company that files documents in the Land Title office I got a hold of a manager there who was very aware of the problem. She confirmed my sister had filed her documents correctly (Which I already knew) and then advised that it was a reporting issue between the land title office who reports those transactions to the government Assessors office who then in turn reports to all the Cities in BC . Somewhere along the line the report was missed. But now the Land office has sent notice to the Assessor’s office who will then file an urgent report with the City so it will be cleared up tomorrow. And my Sister can claim her exemption. Phew. Nothing more fun than dealing with 3 different levels of government 🙂
Well done! A day that will sustain you in any future skirmishes!
Robin Moore says
I always find the name of the bogeyman that a business answers to when things go wrong or they are just not being reasonable. A blind friend who’s mother just passed had changed her mind about disposition of her ashes. It didn’t change the amount the funeral home would make but they wouldn’t make the change. I called the state Secretary of State to find out who is in charge of licensing funeral homes and got them together with my friend. Suddenly the funeral home was volunteering to bring them by so she wouldn’t have to navigate the bus to pick them up. It made her life much easier. No matter how a business likes to be unhelpful, there is always someone else who gives them the possible nightmare of losing a license or bad publicity. Media consumer advocates calling them about the matter as soon as they hang up with the govt guy is a fun touch if you can get it timed right ROFL. Most local stations have someone who covers such things. We have two I know of in Seattle, Jesse Jones and Problem solvers. Just the cherry on top of their day.
d LM a says
U go prospero!
Instead of a rant, a problem stated & the steps to fix it.
People can respond to the problem, not so much to your frustration & blame fault finding when you ‘ve gone nuts ? trying to fix something you don’t unner stan.
And this is why audio doesn’t work for me! Quote … I remember hearing it but where why and in relation to what …
SsssPfttt, who was that masked man?
BT is the new age traveling hate monger … the more things change … & for evil to prosper good people need only do …
Holler back on the flip side yawl
The mangled mishmash made me laugh so I knew it had to be a comedy of some sort. Never watched the movie, though.
(“Best of the best” reminded me of Men in Black. Love that movie)
Re: Crazy Ranter, it’s good you have the power to block. I love the way the New Zealand Prime Minister decided to “block” the Mosque shooter: never say his name and blank out his face so he gets no publicity. What an excellent way to disrespect someone who deserves no notice.
Agreed on the blocking. Heavy media coverage of these psychos and their pasts has always sickened me because it gives them what they are seeking. Deny them the publicity and remove a chunk of motivation
Richard Hainsworth says
Your piano turner, as in big brute who thinks he’s refined because he shifts musical instruments, probably copy-pasted paragraphs from dozens of posts on alt-right web-sites into a single document, then spent the rest of the night copying the same document into as many websites as he could find on his wife’s computer with comment sections.
At most, I pity the wife, trapped with a sad sack who blames people he’s never met, but whom his TV’s nox flues says are to blame, for being a sad sack.
Sit a monkey in front of a computer, and you will get a random stream of characters. Sit a MAGA piano turner in front of a computer, and you will get 4k of random paragraphs on the hate topic de jour amongst those of his ilk. Both are equally meaningless because neither come from a reasoning mind.
So as not to have my comment deleted for being too political, I will refrain from from comparing the piano turner’s opus with the 128 char verbal diarrhea of another MAGA moaner.
I suppose you are right to delete idiotic comments and ban ranting racists from this site. It is your home and you don’t want dirt on the carpet. And I can go to see screeching monkeys at a zoo, or be astounded at the rants in the comment sections of ‘The Hill’ or ‘Washington Post’. But I will admit to disappointment at not catching, before you deleted them, the comments of those who tried to bawlderise your work: I would have liked to have been amused, as might Austen’s Mr. Bennet listening to his nephew, at viewing the ‘good china’.
I’m from New Zealand. Thank you. I too will never use his name
Your books are great.
Sue Johnson says
I had to look it up – I had no idea but now maybe I will watch that movie – so all good. I did think that the quote could almost have come from the Malazan series but it would have to have been more hardbitten and pessimistic. Anyway I went to look at some quotes and I hope it is OK to give just this one – “When wisdom drips blood fools stand triumphant.” It has to be about Brexit 🙁
Oh no! I now have an EARWORM!
the first cut is the deepest!
OMG. Isn’t that the movie with the toy soldiers that come to life and start battling the other toys? I can’t remember the name, I just remember the main bad guy was voiced by Tommy Lee Jones, and the good toys being sent off in a boat at some national park at the end of the movie. It had to have come out somewhere in the mid 90s cause my boyfriend at the time was obsessed and quoted this movie ALL THE TIME!
Margaret R says
Ilona, I’m not a lawyer and I agree with your position to ban crazy Turner but are there legal ramifications to publishing his email when you directly state in your blog that you won’t? Sorry to be a pill. I just don’t want you to get in trouble.
From Contact Page:
If you are emailing as a reader, please read the FAQ below. We love to hear from you. Most of the email we receive is very kind. Unfortunately, some of it isn’t, so all of our email is screened by an assistant. If your email is abusive, we will likely never see it. In the event it is especially abusive, it will be posted on this blog with your email and name.
There are two that I grew up hearing from my father—a career army officer.
1, Soldiers usually win the battles and generals get the credit for them. By Napoleon Bonaparte
2. The soldier above all others prays for peace, for it is the soldier who must suffer and bear the deepest wounds and scars of war. By Douglas Macarthur
That had to be General George “Screw Loose” Patton in one of his most touchy feely moments,
It was rumored at the time of his death that some of his troops did it.
I guess they just couldn’t take all that recognition, appreciation, and praise. ?
I hope that nutcase you mentioned is on all the government watch lists and that they
are actually watching his every move. Is there anyone you can alert?
Aside from that,
I think that everyone , including the government, the police, and the media worldwide, should stop giving out the names of murders. Some of them crave the fame, even in death. Their names should be forever erased from the public ear.
Paula L says
My late uncle got away with being a literal pain in the ass to Patton–my uncle was the guy in a hospital unit at the Battle of the Bulge with the hypodermic needle full of penicillin, who administered the shots and one of the patients so-treated, was Gen George S Patton….
Inspired by these last couple of blog posts, and particularly this last quote (which sounded to me like it was generated by a neural net that had been trained on rousing speeches) I talked to Janelle Shane, of neural net knitting fame*, yesterday. The question was whether or not rousing speeches before battle (or speeches that had that sort of feel) had enough similar characteristics to train a neural net on them so that it produces it’s own rousing speeches. We don’t know. There is only one way to answer this question!
I volunteered to curate the collection of text, and this will only go forward if we can get a large enough sample. (Around ten thousand words of text – challenging, but doable, I think, if a number of people pitch in a speech or two. This means that other people share our warped sense of humor, of course…)
What we need: The text of rousing speeches (before battle, or something battle-like). Historical, fictional, books, plays, movies, radio shows, bring them on!
What to do with them: Please include the source, a link to the source if available, and your name (or handle) if you’d like credit (this is just for fun) and attach them to this post here or send them to firstname.lastname@example.org ** with the subject line Speeches! Encourage others to play – I’m really hoping we get to see an AI exhorting to stand firm and do or die for us and our sisters, brothers, fathers, mothers…!
* Seriously, if you don’t know her, google her projects. It will make your day better.
** Yes, this is an older address that I’m not currently using for much.
Sue Gundel says
That quote is hysterical. If it isn’t from Stripes it’s probably the Three Stooges!! I love your emails. I’m so sorry that you have to cut all the words out. Even though you post the stuff that was cut, it makes so much more work for you two. Hang in there!
Lol. In my head I went straight to Men In Black, than realized it was the voice not the movie.
I always wanted a Gorgonites.
Just had to leave a guess at that quote because it made me chuckle, but am I right in guessing it is from the Green Army Dude General in “Toy Story”? XD
cheryl z says
Thank you for keeping this blog free from hatred, it has no place here.
Thank you for blocking him. I am Muslim and I love your books and I appreciate your response to hateful comments.