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Birthday Florida Man

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Kids are here for delayed Father’s Day. We are still planning on family relocation to Florida and the Kid 1 brought home a fun game. Okay, you have to do this with me. Google your birthday, day and month only, and Florida Man. A funny Florida man article will pop up.

For example, here is mine:

January 1st, Florida man.

Florida man arrested for attacking McDonald’s employee over not getting a straw, police say

Gordon:

April 3rd, Florida man

Thong-wearing Florida man arrested while building shed with garbage on stranger’s property

The story doesn’t always have to match the date, as long as it comes up in your first page search results. Post the results in the comments.

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Comments

  1. Can it be florida MEN?

    Florida Men Arrested After Drugs Found In “Bag Full Of Drugs”

    If not,

    Florida man accused of smearing feces in restroom and sauna. <– ew

    • August 17, Florida man: Florida man dumped dirt on girlfriend’s borrowed car with front-end loader

      • hey, that’s my date/article, too! Plus this one from the National:

        “Florida man wore female underwear, tried on baby clothes during break-in, deputies say”

  3. Florida man gets $37,500 after officer thought doughnut glaze was meth.

    Poor Florida Man. I loved the building shed made of trash on someone else’s property ^_^

  4. January 22 Florida man wanted to prove independence to mom so … apparantly he robbed a gas station lol… i shouldnt laugh ????

    • Hahaha these are hysterical :
      20.03
      Florida Man Attacked By Neighborhood Squirrel Who Has Residents On High Alert
      ????

    • June6th – “Florida man charged with pouring ketchup on his girlfriend.” We just moved to the Raleigh, NC area after living in Orlando for 30 years. This headline is tame compared to some things that happened in our neighborhood.

  6. Florida Man Tries To Pay For Fast Food With Bag Of Weed

    wow – Florida is a weird place

  8. Shirtless Florida man travels to Myrtle Beach to head bang during Hurricane Florence

    Or if woman count too:
    Florida woman makes bomb threat to halt boyfriend’s urine test

    • Florida man in green pajamas decided to eat pancake breakfast in middle of busy street.

      Well, OK then. Hope it was tasty. ????

  10. 9/19 – Naked Florida Man Starts House Fire After Baking Cooking on George Foreman Grill
    ????????????

    • hahah got this too!! Also, the funny thing, in college, I set off the college fire alarm because I was baking something. I was like wait… nope, not me. I wasn’t naked, a man, or cooking on a george foreman grill. *whew*!

  11. Florida man, drunk and naked, allegedly set house on fire!

    Here’s the kicker: he was baking cookies!

  12. January 21
    Florida man, woman run over by patrol car while lying in road to watch eclipse

    • July 1: A Florida man is lucky to be alive after he was chased by a woman with an axe for refusing sex. The man repeatedly denied the advances before growing frustrated and grabbing the axe.

      This is hilarious!

    • The first result was really sad for Sept 21st, so I am going with the second listing on the first page:

      Florida man suspected of smelling women’s feet at library, leads police on scooter chase

  15. Florida man posed as a housewife to trick unsuspecting straight men into letting him perform sex acts on them while he secretly videotaped the encounters to later post online, federal officials said Tuesday

  16. A Florida man arrested for destroying a liquor store under construction told police he was Alice in Wonderland and that a “hookah-smoking caterpillar” ordered him to attack the site.

    • This one came up for me, too! ‘Florida man wrecks liquor store, blames hookah-smoking caterpillar”

  19. “Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza”
    …well that’s something isn’t it? lol

  20. “Florida Man’s Penis Shot Could Land Him In Jail: Report”

    0_0

    I don’t wanna know…

    • September, 14: And out of curiosity – Florida woman didn’t get enough tomatoes so she chased grandpa with a knife, deputies say.

  22. Florida man arrested for having sex with miniature horse on multiple occasions, deputies say

  23. Aug 10 “Florida Man Arrested for DUI Says He Smoked Pot to Prepare for Jesus to Return”

  24. Police: Florida man rigged door in attempt to electrocute pregnant wife.

    This got dark…

  25. Florida man drunk and naked allegedly set house on fire in failed cookie baking attempt

    Truth is truly stranger than fiction.

  26. April 10 – Florida man arrested after dining on spaghetti with his bare hands

    Apparently drunk, shirtless, sitting on the floor at Olive Garden LOL.

  27. My my, he’s busy that Florida Man… Here’s mine: “Florida man arrested for throwing alligator through drive-thru window.” ????

    FYI, it was a Wendy’s. The guy was charged with assault with a deadly weapon without intent to kill (!)

  28. January 4th
    Florida man arrested after hitting dad with pizza because he was mad he helped birth him

      • Florida has an open government. It’s called Government in the Sunshine Act and it makes it easy to pull any kind of record, photograph, video. I assume other states do weird stuff, they just hide it. Journalists love pulling the weird out, especially naked, let’s face it, it sells stories.

  29. Sep,15 – Florida man suspected of smelling woman’s feet at library leads police on scooter chase

  30. June 20, 🙂
    Jonathan Ortiz Was Playing Pokemon GO In Park After Hours, Was Arrested When Police Discovered 6 Pounds Of Drugs In His Car | June 20

  31. Florida Man Set On Fire While Siphoning Fuel With A Shop-Vac

    Well, I’d believe it…

  34. Florida man charged in naked rake attack.

    I guess a naked rake is a new kind of weapon. Or perhaps a garden-variety bodice-ripper.

  35. My Jan 27th birthday was a bomb!
    Florida Man Prompts Evacuation at Taco Bell After Bringing Grenade He Found While Fishing
    Ocala police later verified on their Facebook page the device was a WWII hand grenade and a bomb squad had removed the device without incident.

  36. May 11: Florida man arrested after hiding legless, fugitive girlfriend in storage bin.

    Wow, mind boggles at things happening in Florida.

  37. Florida man with no arms charged with stabbing Chicago tourist

    I… have questions. ???? I’m going to miss y’all!

    • LOL I got this one too.

      “Watch: Florida Man goes on beer run with Alligator in hand.”

      I have so many questions, was it a a specific type of beer he wanted? Was the Gator also getting drunk? Did the gator put him up to it maybe?

  39. Search Results
    Web results

    Florida man with no arms charged with stabbing Chicago tourist

  40. Very first result

    Florida Man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase

  42. I’m sorry. I win:

    December 24 Florida Man

    “Florida Man Bites His Brother’s Penis Off After He Walks In On His Brother Having Sex With His Cousin On His Favorite Dragon Ball Z Blanket”

  43. February 6 Florida Man tried to run over son who wouldn’t take a bath ????

  44. Naked Florida man starts house fire while baking cookies on George Foreman grill

    Question: at that point why does the brand of grill matter?

  46. Florida man offered to pay officer with hamburger for oral sex, police say. Yes, Florida is a weird place!

  47. September 17 Florida man and Megan Mondarano get stopped for DUI, have sex in the back of the patrol car

  48. Errr, worryingly I got

    “Florida man says 3 syringes found in his butt aren’t his”

    This gives me great concern. Seriously. And where in the butt? Do I want to read this article? But seriously, where in the butt? I should read it.

    Oh dear lord, DO NOT READ YOUR ARTICLE!!!!!

    • Ok, I just had to read your article ????

      It wasn’t enough that they weren’t his, but …HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW THEY GOT THERE???

      • Oh when i did trauma surgery back in training you wouldnt believe the horse manure people would tell us with a straight face. We would laugh ourselves silly later. Best request was for a prescription for a pound of morphine doc to take the edge off…. ????????

  50. Florida man tried to break into car filled with cops, officials say

    lololololol

  51. August 6th – Florida Man on Flakka Thinks He’s Possessed, Strips Naked, Disrupts Traffic on I-95

    They have pictures people! His full backside from top to bottom, and feet. ha, ha, ha. And a side shot. He looks to be in fine shape, except for being out of his mind and feeling possessed. Are you sure you want to move to Florida?!

  52. 🙂 A 71-year-old Florida man tied a gun to a weather balloon to fake his own murder.

  54. Florida Man Wanted By Police, Arrested After Streaming Live Video Of Himself On Social Media

    He made it easy for the police!

  55. On September 30th, 2008, a Florida Man dove in and punched a shark after it grabbed nearly his entire dog in it’s mouth.
    Respect mon gars ????????

    • Wow. And I guess he saved his dog and both made it to shore safely :). Maybe crazy, but this guy’s got serious guts. This is my favorite. If I were being eaten by a shark ???? I’d want this guy around 🙂

  57. “Florida police arrested a homeless man Saturday morning after he allegedly stabbed another homeless man to death with a sword.”

    Well then. That escalated quickly.

  58. Florida man accused of having sex with ‘Frozen’ toy at Target. FYI, it was an Olaf plushie.

  59. Florida reptile store owner put lizard in mouth, smacked employees with critter in attack: police

  60. Florida man who was peeing all over room attacks good Samaritan who tried to stop him, police say

  63. September 14: Shirtless FL man travels to Myrtle Beach to headband during Hurricane Florence

  67. Florida Man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase

  69. The Florida Man Times | The Florida Man Challenge
    MAY
    May 19

    POSTED ON MARCH 23, 2019 BY FLORIDA MAN
    Florida Man Challenge May 19

    While some people enjoy walking around their homes naked, a Florida man was tasered after walking around a neighborhood in the rain. As police approached, the man ran causing the officer to discharge his taser.

    The naked man was quoted as saying “I receive sexual gratification by being naked in public”

  70. Florida man accused of attacking mom when she wouldn’t dress his mannequin.
    March 30th

  72. Florida man demands less money during bank robbery, deputies say..he only wanted $1,100, and when the teller handed hime $2,000 he said it was too much!

    I was curious about Texas, so I tried and it wasn’t near as much fun!

  76. Florida man wrecks liquor shop, blames “hookah-smoking caterpillar” (he thought he was Alice)

  77. July 3rd – which means I’ll have a new one soon, I’m sure!

    Florida Man Appears To Have Sex With Tree In View Of Passing Drivers

  78. “Florida man caught with cocaine on his nose insists drugs were not his”

    Ah, Florida, what a state I live in.

  79. 1. 2019 “Florida man records himself performing sex acts on his dog.”

    2. 2020 “Florida man looking for auto parts store gets directions to jail.”

    . . . Two totally different ends of the spectrum, there.

  80. A Florida man has been arrested after demanding cash and doughnuts from a local Krispy Kreme.

    This makes sense to me. Why not ask for the donuts too?

  81. lol Florida Man Arrested at Mar-a-Lago, Says He Came to Talk to Trump About ‘His $6.3 Trillion’

  83. April 12th – Half-Nude Florida Man Wearing Underwear Marked “Breathalyzer, Blow Here” Arrested for DUI

  84. August 7

    “Florida man said he smoked THC ‘because Jesus was returning,’ cops say“

  85. My Florida man is super special.

    June xx: Florida man throws samurai sword at sheriff’s deputies

  86. Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza.

  87. Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza

  88. July 2nd

    First article:

    “Florida man sits on gun, shoots himself in the penis.”

  90. December 26th…

    Florida Man Worried About Vampires Intentionally Burns Down His Home.

    (hahahahahahaha…..no one was hurt, but he did yell that the vampires were going to defend themselves.)

  91. April 12th – Half-Nude Florida Man Wearing Underwear Marked “Breathalyzer, Blow Here” Arrested for DUI

    • What kind of bow? Like the kind you wear in your hair? If so, where was he wearing it. If the weapon kind, well then.

  94. Florida man jumps into crocodile pit, gets bit, claims he’s was held captive ????????????

  96. For December 30: Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House

    Wow. It really works.

  97. Trapped Florida man rescued from well in DeLand, says he went in ‘Just to say that he did’. November 2

  99. Florida man arrested for attempted striptease at restaurant.

    As a Florida resident, this is a normal thing.

  100. October 24th, Florida Man…

    Florida man ‘dry humps’ stuffed Olaf doll at Pinellas Park Target, police say

  101. April 24th,
    Floridaman tries to kiss venomous snake and is immediately bitten on the lips

  102. “Florida man accused of stabbing girlfriend over underdone potato” ????‍♀️

  104. Florida man takes epic mugshot after driving naked near school with wires attached to penis

    ????

  106. July 2 – Florida man sits on gun, shoots himself in p****

    Second one is: Florida man arrested for pelting girlfriend with McDonald’s Sweet and Sour Packets

    Wow – another was arrested for firing a musket at passing cars while dressed as a pirate and yet another (one hopes they’re different men anyway) arrested for putting semen in a coworker’s water….

    Those are all just on page 1 – sounds like a good day to stay home!

  107. January 4th

    “Florida man arrested after hitting dad with pizza because he was mad he helped birth him”

  108. June 28
    Florida man back in jail after not paying for taxi to pick him up at jail
    ????

  109. “A Florida man was arrested for assaulting his roommate with pizza”

    Pretty tame compared to the Florida woman…

    “Florida woman accused of murdering her husband was once his stepdaughter”

  110. 2/22 — A Florida man caught peeping into neighbor’s lanais told police he was under orders from President Donald Trump.

  111. Nov 21 Florida Man demands less money in bank robbery. Fair enough, no need to be greedy.

  112. The only one on my front page that didn’t involve sex or drugs.

    “Florida man known for viral Easter bunny brawl arrested after hit-and-run, tells cops to ‘Google’ him: police”

      • They were both dressed as the Easter Bunny and this one felt the other was infringing on his turf. Yes I made the mistake of actually reading the story.

    • We got the same report…..it was better than the almost naked DUI pulled over wearing only a dirty (ewww) pair of underwear labeled “Breathalizer – Blow here” or the guy that wanted to blow up Democrats!

  113. Mine: February 7 – Authorities in Florida are searching for a missing man who they say believes he’s God and has been saying he wants to heal and kill people.

  114. February 7: Missing Florida man says he wants to heal, kill people

    …upon further reading, he also “believes he is God.”

    Dancing through a sobriety test was the runner up.

    • Oh, my dad’s birthday (June 18) the first result was “This 101-year-old Florida Man still volunteers with Meals On Wheels”

      …but in true Florida Man fashion, the second result was “Florida man with machete face tattoo accused of machete attack”

  115. November 12th, Naked Florida man revealed on video sneaking into restaurant.

    That was just the first one that came up. 🙂

  116. January 6: Florida man finds out his dad helped deliver him at birth, throws pizza at him, police say

    LOL

  117. Here’s mine:

    kutv.com › news › nation-world › p…
    Resultados de la Web
    Police: Florida man jailed after trying to ‘barbecue all the child molesters’ | KUTV

    He a hero ????

  118. OMG!
    A Florida man was charged with manslaughter for killing a peeping tom who had been looking into his girlfriend’s window as they had sex, according to police. Victor Vickery, 30, was charged Thursday for fatally beating 57-year-old Asaad Akar, according to the Associated Press.Oct 21, 2019

    EEEK!

    • Also,

      Shot For Shot: Florida Man Shot In The Foot After Refusing To Take A Shot Of Alcohol At A Bar

  119. Florida man hit pregnant girlfriend with bag of tortilla chips over baby’s paternity….

  120. June 16th:
    Florida man throws samurai sword at sheriff’s deputies

    Florida Man Allegedly Stole Pool Floats From Homes to ‘Stop Himself From Raping Women’

    Florida man uses teeth, broomstick & a pickaxe to attack his neighbor

    I feel kind of aggressive myself, these days!! ^^”

  121. A Florida man was rescued after trying to ride a hamster ball to the Bahamas

    Guess he needed a vacation

  122. Florida man gets head-butted, knocked out by alligator.

    Are you sure you want to move to Florida? Well at least you can always count on the local news giving you a laugh!

  124. January 17th: “Florida man wanted to prove independence to mom so he tried to rob gas station, police say”

  125. December 16:
    Police Search for Master Thief Who Shoved an Entire Subway Footlong Down His Pants.

    I thought they fired their spokesman Jared. 😉

  126. Florida man brandishes samurai sword during road rage incident

    Florida woman is better

    Florida woman steal ambulance, crashed into patrol car

    And my favorite:
    Florida woman punches boyfriend for the way he cuts his meat.

    • Can you imagine what would happen during quarantine? Cutting meat was just the beginning.

  127. Sept 27: Florida man arrested after whipping out samurai sword during trash dispute.

    Seems reasonable. lol

  128. I tried it with both Florida and Texas. Florida man tried to get caiman (from crocodiles family, not gator) drunk vs. Texas man killed 12 elderly women. I’ve lived in and loved both states, but based on this, it would be Hello Florida!!!

  129. Wow. I laughed so hard at this one.

    “A Florida Man with a record of biting cops has done it again. He must think there’s actually bacon inside or is he trying to get to the cream filling. Either way, he should be on a constant muzzle.”

  130. August 17th

    “Florida man arrested after girlfriend dies during alleged suicide pact”

  132. September 29th;
    Florida man arrested for cutting brakes on 100 e-scooters ????????

    • I remember when this happened, I believe it was in the Villages, he would go out at night and cut the brakes, repeatedly (same people), over months. Someone finally put some cameras out and they caught him. Pretty dangerous!

  133. August 10th:

    Florida Man Arrested for DUI Says He Smoked Pot to Prepare for Jesus to Return

  134. Top this:
    “July 10 Florida man wasn’t drinking while driving, just at stop signs”

  135. Florida Man Accused Of Ditching Boy Outside Police Station Because He Thought He Was Gay
    December 10,

    Ehmm, ???? I have no words therefore….

    • I tried Florida woman too. In the name of gender quality and all that. ????

      Florida woman sentenced after pulling alligator from her pants during traffic stop (fyi, they were yoga pants ????)

      And

      Florida woman lived with dismembered boyfriend for months. ????

  138. Nov 26 – Florida man charged with stabbing a woman with a fork over underdone potato

  139. I didn’t like mine, so I’m borrowing from another day.

    Naked Florida man with crossbow who claimed aliens were after him shot by deputy

    Are you sure you want to move? Sounds like aliens are invading.

  140. Drunken Florida Man shoots his dog, cries to police

    Yikes!!!! I am a Cat Person but I would never hurt a Dog!

    • That was mine too so I went with Florida Woman: Florida woman arrested for throwing knife after man ate her leftover Chinese

      Her defense? Allegedly, Sedlak told the victim, “If I wanted to hit you I would have.”

      I’m a proud a Floridian! It’s Never boring here!

  141. Florida Man Removes Woman’s Kidney During Back Surgery Because He Thought It Was a Tumor, November 17

  142. ????????????????
    June 25- Florida Man makes desperate 911 call while clinging to the hood of a speeding car.

    My birthday tomorrow! Wonder what fun Florida man story the day will bring.

  146. Aug 13 – Florida man arrested for attempted striptease in restaurant

    Thank you. Today at work sucked. You made me laugh

  147. “Florida man shoplifted from Kohl’s minutes after interviewing for job there, police say”

    That’s one way to fail an interview.

  148. Florida man arrested after breaking into a restaurant and cooking himself a hamburger.

  149. May 12

    Florida man arrested after praising the lord while highway-surfing his Cadillac ????

  150. Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza

  151. Florida man who was peeing all over room attacks good Samaritan who tried to stop him, police say

  153. Thank you, thank you House Andrews, for this today. It’s always great to laugh out loud … even when your own Florida Man thingie is not funny.

  155. January 22 – Florida Man wanted to prove independence to Mom so he tried to rob a gas station, authorities say

  156. August 26th Florida man:

    Florida man claiming to be God arrested after touching people, fighting with police, being tased

  157. Florida man removes a woman’s kidney during spinal surgery because he thought it was a tumor.

    SMH! You sure you want to move there? Lol!

  158. November 8th – Florida man asks police to remove mugshot from Facebook after theft, only for them to replace it with booking photo.

    Are you sure you want to relocate to Florida? ????????

  161. December 30, Florida man

    Florida Man Arrested After Officers Watch Theft of Car on His Instagram Feed

    Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House

    These came up first and second. I couldn’t resist posting both.

  162. September 29th – I didn’t like the link for the Florida man search so I used Florida woman instead. I think that’s much more appropriate to my birthday… ^___^

    Florida Grandma Tries Scaring Off Naked Florida Man by Pulling her Dentures Out

  163. March 21st, Florida Man

    Florida men, one dressed in a bull onesie, attempt to burn down house with Ragu sauce, police say.

    You sure you all want to move there?

    • Ooh, I just saw yours after posting mine. Us March 21sters clearly think the same. And odd stuff happens on our birthdays…

  164. April 28: Florida man on meth attacks mattress looking for girlfriend’s lover ‘hiding inside,’ police say.

  165. April 27th

    Florida man arrested after witnesses said he practiced karate on swans

    (I obviously do not encourage any type of animal cruelty, but this was the top result and it really made me laugh.)

    • I doubt the swans were hurt. They are not as fragile as they seem. They can break bone, big ones with their wings, and that beak!

  167. Drunk Florida man shoots dog, cries to police….

    Florida woman arrested for throwing knife after man ate her leftover chinese.

    I like the second better lol

  169. “Florida man denies syringes inside his rectum are his.”

    Originally I was horrified but then I started reading some of the other comments. Ok…guess mine’s wasn’t the ABSOLUTE worse. ^_^;;

  171. November 20th, Florida man arrested for having sex with a miniature horse.
    Ewwww. I want my money back..????????

  172. November 27th, Florida Man
    Police say a 36-year-old Florida man is accused of stabbing a woman with a fork over an undercooked potato.

  173. September 1st
    Florida suspect tries to swim away from police, subdued by algae ????

    Or

    Naked Florida man starts house fire while baking cookies on George Foreman grill ????

  175. April 25th: Florida man was rescued after trying to ride a hamster ball to the Bahamas.

    poifsijfkljspsfsfvxcffrg I just can’t

  176. Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House

    You can’t make this stuff up!!! ????????????

  178. March 20th
    Florida man attacked by a ‘crazy squirrel’ gone nuts. And it was raised by a neighbor

  179. Florida man in stolen ambulance leads law enforcement on multi-county chase, officials say

    Hmmm not nearly as fun as some other days.

  180. Naked Gun: Police say nude, drunk Florida man fired weapons
    October 4

    KEY LARGO, Fla. (AP) — Authorities say a naked drunk Florida man wanted to know if his .45-caliber gun and shotgun worked, so he fired them into the air.

  182. Search Results
    Web results

    Monday. July 23, 2018 Florida Man Bites His Brother’s Penis …

  184. August 22nd – I got the barefoot biker

    https://fm1019.radio.com/blogs/mel/florida-man-august-22-headline

    On August 22nd, 2018, a Florida Man took a cruise down I95 on his motorcycle…shirtless…barefoot…and steering his motorcycle with his feet, according to Vice. He wasn’t caught by police but thanks to technology, we’ve got video!

    So …. after all these stories do you still want to move to Florida? ????

  185. March 17 Florida Man

    Florida man who was peeing all over room attacks good Samaritan who tried to stop him, police say

  186. Search Results
    Web results
    Florida man ‘dry humps’ stuffed Olaf doll at Pinellas Park … ????

  187. Sept 24 Florida Man

    Naked Florida man chases couple around Chick-fil-A parking lot, deputies say

  189. April 6
    Florida man with Florida face tattoo robs store

    Florida man wearing coronavirus mask robs Publix.

    Same same.

  191. January 28 – Police: Florida man thought he stole opioids, got laxatives instead

  192. Florida Man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase

  193. March 18 – Florida man arrested, accused of throwing pancake batter at woman. ????

  194. September 22

    “Florida man rides manatee, dares police to arrest him, gets arrested”

  199. FLORIDA MAN STORY
    EXCLUSIVE
    Florida Man Who Had Sex with Dolphin Says It Seduced Him
    2/3 omg lol
    You guys want to move there???

  201. March 25th: Homeless Florida man calls cops after people he paid for sex don’t show

  202. July 20 – The Florida Man
    Man Risks His Life; Rushes Into Neighbors Home To Save A Grandma And Fight A Fire

  203. Florida Man Tells Cop ‘That’s What She Said’ After Being Pulled Over and Questioned About Bulge ????????

  204. My Birthday is tomorrow, so…,

    ????????????????
    June 25- Florida Man makes desperate 911 call while clinging to the hood of a speeding car

  207. Florida man tries to pull over an Undercover Cop While Pretending to Be an Officer

  208. So I couldn’t pick.. it’s a tie between

    Florida Man shoots himself in the face to see if round is in chamber

    Or

    Floria Man arrested for chewing a mans face.

  210. Florida man reportedly tells cops he thought playing basketball naked would ‘enhance his skill level’

  212. Florida man in stolen ambulance leads law enforcement on multi-county chase, officials say
    Report: Man asked EMT for a ride before stealing ambulance

  216. (5 May) Florida Man Interested in Getting Tased Runs Through Airport in Underwear Waiving Nunchucks

    … though I wonder if tasing would feel different if he had kept the nun-chucks instead of ‘waiving’ them?

  217. Dec. 14th: Florida man arrested for biting boys out of frustration

    …I don’t even know how to process this… what?

  218. January 25th: Florida man says 3 syringes found in his butt aren’t his

    Also: Florida man turns $500K home into technicolor nightmare (He slung paint all over house and yard.)

    • ????

      I watch international rugby when it’s on. There’s a position on the rugby team called the hooker. I know the article refers to prostitutes, but I couldn’t resist.

      For those who don’t watch rugby, rugby players are very muscular and light on their feet.

  220. Bullet Lodged in Florida Man’s Testicle After Wife Shoots Him for Cheating

      • 5/8 Florida Man Tries to Cash $368 Billion Check, and Then the Story Gets Really Weird
        And
        F*** It, I’m drunk, take me to jail’: Florida man crashes lawn mower into police car

  222. Florida Man wearing ‘Crocs’ jumps into a crocodile pit, gets bit, claims he’s was held captive.

    Oy.

  223. Half-Nude Florida Man Wearing Underwear Marked “Breathalyzer, Blow Here” Arrested for DUI.

  224. Dec 14: Florida man captured on camera trying to break gas station door in order to steal Pepsi

    Pepsi is serious business!!!! ????

  225. Florida man breaks into restaurant, strips naked, eats noodles, plays bongos

    Lol sounds fun

  226. A Florida man caught playing basketball naked at a public park said he thought it would help improve his skills

  228. Florida man rigged the door to his home with devices designed to electrocute his pregnant estranged wife

  229. June 19th:
    Florida man, 72, tries to mow down neighbor with tractor during dispute, cops say

    AND THERE’S A VIDEO.

    I am not disappointed.

  230. Florida men, one dressed in bull onesie, attempt to burn down house with Ragu sauce, police say.

    Really? How exactly? And the bull onesie? Um…
    Also, are y’all SURE you want to move to Florida?

  231. Florida man reportedly tells cops he thought playing basketball naked would ‘enhance his skill level’

    It was either that one or

    Florida man hits pregnant girlfriend with bag of tortilla chips over baby’s paternity

  232. WCTV › tv › content › news › Flori…
    Web results
    Florida man pretending to be a cop pulls over real deputy, sheriff’s office says

  233. August 30th, Florida Man

    Florida man accused of grabbing his genitals and giving the finger to a man and his 8-year-old son

    Well….that escalated quickly

  236. October 10th
    Florida man wore female underwear, tried on baby clothes during break-in

    Oh goodness..

  238. September 22 – Florida man rides manatee, dares police to arrest him, gets arrested

  239. 10/28 Florida man jumps off surfboard, lands on shark.
    Second result: Florida man sentenced in plot to blow up Target stores.

  240. Florida Man Arrested For Botched Castration On Another Man He Met On Eunuch Fetish Website

    Oh my.

    • Wow. I didn’t even know that was a thing. I mean, eunuchs can’t have sex. That’s the point of eunuch-izing them in the first place. How? Why?

  242. October 16: Florida Man Calls Police To Report Stolen Marijuana

    Way to go there genius…

  243. Mine were too gross or sad to post.

    Only thing I know about Florida is this from a college friend who lives there: “swim at your community pools; there are lakes, but you risk swimming with gators”.

    Oy!!

  247. Florida Man story
    Florida man recorded himself having sex with his dog, deputies say

    all I can say is yuck, but it was the only story that came up on for my birthday

  248. This was my favorite on first page:

    “Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza.”

  250. March 14th

    Florida man hits pregnant girlfriend with bag of tortilla chips over baby’s paternity.

  252. July 26th

    Florida man brandishes samurai sword during road-rage incident.

    ????????????

  254. I ended up with three.
    Florida man tries to hire hitman to kill brother.
    Florida man throws chair across dining room in steak and shake.
    Florida man attempts to order a burrito at a bank drive through window. Thinks it was Taco Bell.
    All for January 19.

  255. Florida man gets Bush-whacked, struck with can of beans by local deputy. It even had a video of the guy being Bush-whacked.

  258. March 28, Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza.

  259. Florida man sprays women with roach spray, break out nunchucks over loud music, cops say

  260. Is Gordon certain he wants to move to Florida? Is doing weird stuff like that a requirement?

  261. July 1 – “Florida man rips hole in store ceiling, steal more than 70 guns, flees on 3-wheel bicycle”

  262. December 26, Florida man

    Police: Florida man worried about vampires intentionally burns down his home

  264. Florida Man accidentally shoots his own arm, notices two days later – May 10th
    HAHAHA

  265. My stomach hurts after reading all the posts.

    March 29, there are two.

    First one: Florida man believed he was ‘half-man, half-dog’ during fatal attack, doctor says.

    Second one: Drunk Florida man yells ‘come and get me’ to deputies, is arrested

    Okay…note to self don’t go to Florida any time soon. 😀

  266. July 3, Florida Man

    A Florida Man, 26 year old Bill Davis, died yesterday after attempting to microwave a microwave

  267. Florida Man was arrested after he stripped naked and chased two strangers around a Palm Coast Chick-fil-A parking lot, then yelled for everyone to look at his genitals. September 25.

    If it wasn’t so warm all the time, the number of naked Florida men stories would decrease.

    It’s never boring here in Florida. Welcome!!!

  268. Florida man throws toilet through school board building window – 2/22

  269. Florida Man Challenge July 22

    A Florida man who was upset that a woman parked in a handicap spot shot the woman’s boyfriend in the chest. Police are saying that the man may not be facing charges under the state’s “Stand your ground” law.

    REALLY?

  270. Mine was:

    Florida man breaks into restaurant, strips naked, eats noodles, plays bongos.

    Mind boggling…

  271. January 2 – Florida Man Covers Himself in Ashes, Says He’s a 400-Year-Old Indian, Crashes Stolen Car- hmmm

  275. Florida Man arrested for dancing to Hall & Oates and Supertramp…on top of a police car.

    You can’t make this stuff up.

  277. November 7, Florida man jumps into crocodile pir,gets bit, claims he was held captive.

  279. Wow! It was so hard to choose.

    This story was actually on my birthday:
    A Florida man jumped off his surfboard and landed on a shark

    🙂

  282. Florida man arrested for assault with ketchup.

    Also: Fl man head-butted by alligator, knocked out.

  287. So I’ve looked mine up and in Florida every July 20th has something to do with a gun and shooting. Florida man wants bananas shots out utility trucks tires.
    Then I did Az. Guns and more shooting.
    Guess I have a thing for guns. We will see what happens this July. I live in Fl and won’t have any trouble hearing about it.

  290. February 27th – Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza

  293. On September 23rd, 2018, a Florida Man THREW another Florida Man off of a bridge in Daytona Beach

  297. Florida man arrested after botching in-home castration surgery, deputies say….

    August 21

  300. Bwahahaha – September 15 Florida Man… suspected of smelling woman’s feet at library leads police on scooter chase!

    Way to make my upcoming 60th birthday memorable! lolol

  301. 2020: Florida man saves turtle from the streets.

    2019: meth smoking Florida man attacks mattress in a jealous rage. LOL

  302. OMG, there were so many to choose from! My favorite: December 29 – Florida man arrested for rigging door to electrocute pregnant wife

  303. March 9 – Pregnant Florida Woman Reportedly Stabs Her Florida Man for Looking at Photo of Another Woman.

    Lol ok then.

  304. October 31st
    Florida man arrested after another sex toy was thrown on the field during Bills-Patriots game

    • LOL! My birthday is October 22 and mine was someone trying to have sex with a Frozen toy.

  305. LOL!! Winner, winner, chicken dinner!!

    Florida man accused of having sex with ‘Frozen’ toy at Target …

  306. Florida man arrested, caught on video using samurai sword to fight over wheelbarrow – July 15

  307. October 16. First one, I kid you not… Florida man arrested for having sex with miniature horse on multiple occasions…

  308. July 4th

    Florida man loses fingers, eyebrows in fireworks fail.

    Makes sense ????‍♀️????

  310. August 18
    Florida man arrested after performing castration surgery, report says – News … Crazy headlines

  311. November 1st, 2019: “A drunken, shirtless man allegedly barged into several Pensacola homes looking for a fight before running into a fence and knocking himself out, according to an Escambia County Sheriff’s Office arrest report.”

    This is a most excellent game.

  312. Florida man attempts to hide underwater from cops, gets arrested after coming up for air.

    I can’t even.

  313. Florida born and raised, I recommend vacationing not moving here, these stories don’t even raise eyebrows down here, it happens all the time. If you are dead set on coming, I recommend north of Tampa, or an island. Still crazies, but they’re the kind you want to have a cocktail with.

  314. Florida man pretending to be a cop pulls over real deputy, sheriff’s office says

  316. April 13th

    Florida man accused of beating cellmate who asked for a ‘courtesy flush’ to help with smell

  318. February 16: ‘Florida man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf cart chase’

  320. January 12: Florida man tells neighbors he’s going to kill them with kindness then tries to kill them with a machete he named “Kindness”

    OMG

  321. A Florida man was charged with battery after he allegedly slapped his girlfriend in the face with a cheeseburger

  322. Oct 8th – Florida Man Arrested After Catching Alligator, Forcing It To Drink Beer

    (Yes, it bit him!)

  324. Florida man arrested after performing castration surgery.

    I immediately thought that was adding insult to injury … before realising it wasn’t on himself ????

    • Best of other family members:

      Florida man entices gator to bite him; pours beer down its throat, police say

  326. The two stories on my birthday weren’t that exciting (FL man arrested after giving his girlfriend a wet Willy and drive through drug window in a mobile home) but then I found this in a related story (April date): Florida man sues for right to marry his laptop.

    At least it was an apple laptop.

  328. September 27th

    Florida man arrested for whipping out samurai sword during trash dispute

  330. October 24 Florida man arrested for allegedly sexually assaulting stuffed ‘Olaf’ at Target

  332. December 8- Florida man offered to pay officer with hamburger for oral sex, police say

  333. July 11-Florida man, 72, tries to mow down neighbor with tractor during dispute, cops say

    Never heard of this challenge, thank you for the laughs!!

    • Year later-Florida man was arrested after shooting at a van that wouldn’t let him change lanes.

  335. Florida Man Says His Turtle Army Will Destroy Everyone

    This may be my new favorite news headline of all time

  337. LOL you are just discovering the Florida Man meme? It’s been around for awhile haha. My friends and I have had a lot of fun googling Florida Man. And you STILL want to move to Florida, despite all the ridiculousness that state represents? You are far braver than I ever will be.

  338. Florida Man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase

  342. April 29th, Florida man takes upskirt photos of woman at gas station, is caught by corrections officer nearby, deputies say

  343. July 27 Florida Man. ‘Florida man nearly killed in freak lawn furniture accident’. The story of my life.

  345. Florida man finds bright green iguana in toilet, calls 911

    …that seems pretty alright; could happen to anyone…

    Florida Man Disguised as Spider-Man Steals Liquor and Cigarettes

    “who managed to get himself caught, by appearing on surveillance video UNMASKED…it was just a matter of absolute surprise that he would walk up to the door first, try to break in, and then it starts clicking in his head that ‘Oh, I might get recognized if I do this without a mask on'”

    Oh, Florida Man…

  347. OMG

    “Florida man climbs on playground equipment and yells to children how babies are born”

    I’m assuming alchol was involved!

  348. Hubby is june 17
    Florida man, 62, strips, performs a “strange dance” at McDonalds then tried to impregnate a railing
    ????????

  349. June 27
    Naked Florida man stood in a fire and chanted ‘gibberish.’ Mushrooms did it, cops say

  351. Here’s my Florida man story:

    On This Day In Florida Man History: Sept 18: Man Rides Jet Ski On Highway. September 18, 2019. Mel. Getty Images

    What I like about this story is that it is funny, not tragic and not criminal. And here’s a link to the video so that you can get a giggle too.https://lm.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwfts.tv%2F2nM7JEL%3Ffbclid%3DIwAR3Bn70QNjHN48H5YU3bBnCd1QcKjNdUsrqyJjrkqvYl3PvJCcHvej-MPCU&h=AT0rgbsQL1otidaoP4y31imdNDwh1czg5tqi18fa7GmY8fEwyzXu6Q0zvVM_6BxV51K-lOnOArv4hxPk42Xwa-L9eenUiwZEYqijIwGv15SiNO9KC2YuQokZVxKvxC4xH0qE3WV1bPm0A_5CkMjHtUI_IaTsXnc9p00ROufJpY0SlOqD65qWAEm8NcKuvDK8_gTH_EOK9DjoI766BR0bYLhI7eVF2HQiIno4IDgXLFah6kQFe4Ox6yj76UTEozJV9ZtW4QSy5i5ACbCAMg86LQMa3Ym3Z8AQAyuHWfXJpWBvDRgW_CFKhD5Hw1UNtoHRtXHuDbocjKCEGFNG48JX0qhUGJQAxH4dPMkGeUV4wllMD_iCdkLj85SPFt3nIyloLMfZotOa0UQcjoQfsrrv-8Ccuyo9ffqQomNWIrerD6uiqyKw3gaCJlSO-QPQnlv1VfK7qmC61xPRIvwcLoezpT23LZ9sB02S89DBWUOc5rsSUxtyOURiVAYGNTSn3RrqoRA4jUJKH02s7805LYoYUOYbjUW9hKqdmOBFY35ZUMCkfSW_ZnPCEsgdjbj7ResiLU9j7_kdw9glHXCAtmuAJdWzixjD758vtAo5yrYof7bvpEV5t8PW8L3DJZGeBNhfBwKbEPruFZyENL7345DIOXAsQaKKfXCVkWbo5EHjjygZGFTO4Et-nCEDkzcg-T52K5tcuD54b2vYGLZG_hwT-M_Genq-MfUzXXi9tfdt3SOjb_lkkhMmK3im4K7Q6IvFbMuRbgGmpXPNE4CUM4ipV4lOf38q7lV_uaqFVavtqUfo-EBfDC68NGLCdmxwtlb3LW74mOJY-yxav7ry6MA4sJz7Nok9aeQBogZy-dNFWe3lfGvODXiQBsOAuPrIZBNzw-JvFx7-HYkaLkhkcwjWG3a2qXHkQXrHMA76m3Y8j0JXazZXwL0eqFv7SpzhZ8faAKwOgQzWyyzrSeZ8ifTpdqmh9hcZfSPYITrykSlmfmveQ63jSseLT7s2uAN6BgRKMtFeMZUEZ1W_jdbrEdzpJw2hGgMqEz6Y-gqozN7PsI8i8ca70bqox42z8fQmNauZutKpcfjdRceslqA

    Whoa, when it said “copy link address”, I didn’t know it was going to be a novel!

      • Welp, the novel/link address was a total fail. But! If you Google September 18 Florida man, the video will come up along with the puzzled kid in the background “that should be in the water. “

  352. Florida Man Arrested for Cutting the Break Lines of Over 100 E-scooters
    (real, I think.)

    and

    Florida Grandma Tries Scaring Off Naked Florida Man by Pulling Her Dentures Out
    (possibly fake)

  354. December 30 – Florida man screaming about vampire allegedly sets his house on fire

  355. March 7 Police: Florida man jailed after trying to ” barbeque all the child molesters.” It’s a shame he’s likely psychotic. I’d buy him a margarita.

  356. July 29th… Florida Man Makes Beer Run With Gator In Hand. Florida man makes a beer run to a Jacksonville convenience store carrying a live alligator in his hand with it’s mouth taped shut.

    Never needed beer so bad that I couldn’t put my gator down before I went in to buy it.

    Maybe the gator was a bargaining chip. I’ll give you this gator if you give me beer!

  359. December 14
    Florida man captured on camera trying to break gas station door in order to steal Pepsi

  360. Sept. 4-“Florida Man flashes buttocks at IHOP after impersonating a police officer to get free food”

  364. Florida man accused of threatening his family by texting them Coldplay lyrics, and warning them of retribution from his “Nazi prison associates” was persuaded by police to end a standoff in return for a fresh slice of pizza, reports say.

  365. Florida man allegedly stabs alligator to death, tries to sell the meat

    Florida man’s family values appear shaky.

  366. 1st listing: Florida man got 4 years for stealing 4 $15 dollar phone chargers. He was beaten to death in prison.

  368. Florida Man throws urine on prosecutor during sentencing hearing……..
    I guess the prosecutor turned around and said to him “Urine trouble mister!”……I’ll show myself out

  369. Florida man is arrested for trying to get a caiman drunk.
    Texas man says “psychotic” cow attacked him twice, nearly killed him…

    Decisions, decisions… ???? Are you sure you want to move?

  371. October 7th: Florida man accused of pouring beer in gator’s mouth after enticing reptile to bite his arm

  372. Florida Man Arrested for DUI While Lemur and Wallaby Escape from Truck During Traffic Stop

  373. March 31:

    (1) Bullet Lodged in Florida Man’s Testicle After Wife Shoots Him for Cheating; also,

    (2) Florida mother shot burglar who entered home because ‘dinosaurs were chasing him.

    ???????????? Gotta love those Floridians.

  374. November 11th – Florida man breaks into restaurant, strips naked, eats noodles, plays bongos

  375. “Florida man claiming to be God arrested after touching people, fighting with police, being tased”

  378. August 14, Florida man claiming to be Alice in Wonderland says ‘hookah-smoking caterpillar’ told him to destroy liquor store with forklift

  379. Florida man arrested after another sex toy was thrown on the field during Bills-Patriots game.
    LOL!

  380. Florida Man Caught Posing As Middle School Student To Play In Youth Football League

    He was 21 years old. I can’t imagine how they caught him.

  381. Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza

  383. Naked Florida man starts house fire while baking cookies on George Foreman grill.

  384. July 28 Florida man wielding live gator chases people in convenience store on a beer run…

  386. Florida man allegedly stabbed ex-girlfriend with large sword, ran her over with truck.

  387. Florida man accused of killing dancing flamingo is hit by truck and killed before trial
    ????

  389. August. 16th

    Doctor: Florida man Austin Harrouff believed he was ‘half-dog, half-man’ in face-biting double homicide

    Or on a lighter note:

    Deputies: Florida man in front-end loader dumps mountain of dirt on girlfriend’s car ( w/pics)

  390. Florida man jumped off surfboard and landed on a shark, which promptly bit his foot — not too seriously since he refused to go to hospital.

  392. July 8, Florida man:
    Florida man says lighting firecrackers under child’s bed is a prank gone wrong

    July 8, Florida woman (I had to share this one):
    A Florida woman has been sentenced to probation after allegedly pulling an alligator out of her yoga pants during a traffic stop.

  394. My Florida man was decent but changing it to woman gave me a doozy!

    “Florida woman hit man with SUV, tried to urinate on deputy”

    ????

  396. March 22- “Florida Man shoved women to get at her egg rolls, police say…”

    According to the article the woman refused to let the man in her house, and he ended up barging into the home.

    I’ve never found a fried, spring roll wrapper to be worth an arrest record. Maybe I could understand if it was a beignets or a funnel cake.

  399. Florida man makes beer run with large gator in his hand.

    This is especially appropriate, I think, since I’m a 911 dispatcher.

    XD

  400. December 5 Florida man abandoned child on roadside because he thought boy might be gay.

    Now that’s a horrible thing to associate with my b-day! FYI, I was raised in Florida (Tampa – St Pete area) and couldn’t wait to escape, but now enjoy the panhandle on field trips.

  401. Well, mine is a bit dark…
    Police: Florida man commits murder over imaginary girlfriend

  402. October 28, Florida man jumps off surfboard, lands on shark.

    Ahahaha

    Thank you for the laughs

  403. High on love: Florida man accused of hiding marijuana in box of Valentine’s Day chocolates
    Feb 5, 2020 · Suspect found hiding in attic

  405. I’m not sure mine is safe for a family-friendly site…????????

    August 30th: “Florida man accused of grabbing his genitals and giving the finger to a man and his 8-year-old son”

  407. June 25:
    Florida man arrested for running naked through Walmart parking lot.

    ???????? this was hilarious—I’m totally sharing this game with all my friends

  408. Wow. So many things that Florida Man did on May 13. Here’s one:

    Florida man turns himself in for killing imaginary friend.

  409. Florida man Austin Harrouff believed he was ‘half-dog, half-man’ in face-biting double homicide

  410. Florida Man Causes Thousands of Dollars Worth of Property Damage Trying to Kill “Demons”: PD

    It’s always demons.

  411. September 30: Florida man reunited with iPhone more than year after he lost it in ocean

  412. Florida man gets probation for picking up, transporting 41 turtles

    …stopped by deputy for running stop sign, deputy found (turtles) in “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” backpack
    …other passenger, when asked by deputy had anything else, pulled a 1-foot gator from her yoga pants.

    Strange AF. O_0

  413. July 10, Florida man:

    On This Day In Florida Man History: Florida Man With No Arms Stabs Man With Scissors

  416. Florida man passed out in Taco Bell drive thru with foot on gas and car in park… which started a fire… which didn’t wake him up. Police were called

  417. April 21st
    Florida man arrested for trying to pull over an undercover detective.
    (Don’t pretend to be cop ????)

  418. Florida Man Who Threw Toilet Through Window in East St. Louis Found With Second Crapper.

    I must have a case of giggles because I laughed way to long at this. 🙂

  419. Florida man shot outside bar after rejecting shot inside bar, officials say
    ????‍♀️

  420. Florida man parks Smart car in kitchen so it won’t blow away

    Naked Florida man starts house fire while baking cookies on George Foreman grill

  421. I was hoping my birthday was going to be something not so bad cause I have a great birthday, 8/8, however on August 8th a Florida man received probation for having sex with a dog. Reading on, the article goes on to say it was discovered by his girlfriend who found the pictures on his phone, of him and other females engaging in sexual acts with dogs. Smart girl that she was, she took the phone to the local police station ( hopefully after she took a long hot shower).
    Double eewww!!

  422. Florida man throws pizza slice at his mom during argument, deputies say

    Tsk, tsk, RUDE. The naughty step for you, Florida Man!

  423. Florida man arrested for having sex with stuffed ‘Olaf’ at Target – ClickOrlando
    Oct 23, 2019 · Florida man arrested for having sex with stuffed ‘Olaf’ at Target. Jeff Tavss, Executive Producer. Published: October 23, 2019, 3: 43 …

  424. June 23. “Florida man convicted of killing former FSU mascot in gumbo spice dispute.” There are others, of course, but that’s my favorite.

  425. September 28: Florida Man Threatens Red Lobster “I work For The Taliban and I Have a Bomb in This Bag”
    Lmao

  427. April 1st:
    “Sheriff: Florida man’s April Fools prank of impersonating policeman goes wrong”

  428. Ah, yes. I love this one.

    My Florida Man birthday story:

    Florida Man arrested for slapping a pregnant woman with a cheeseburger

  433. florida man arrested for botched castration on anotherbman he met on eunuch fetish website ok i need anew birthday now, thusisnot working for me

  434. Published August 19
    Florida man arrested after allegedly shoving steaks worth more than $50 down his pants

  436. Well, yeah… May 3rd:
    ‘You Gotta Smoke A Bowl With Me Please’: Florida Man Invites Police To Smoke Pot While Showing Off His Marijuana Plant

  438. Feb 15: Florida Man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase

  439. Florida man threatened to ‘chop’ house guest with machete after not flushing toilet, police say

  440. A Florida man allegedly damaged a white Cadillac after he dumped a bunch of dirt with a front-end loader when his girlfriend showed up to his job Friday in the borrowed car.

  442. I can actually see this one being true. “Florida man rides manatee, dares police to arrest him, gets arrested”. September 22nd – It’s also Frodo and Bilbo’s birthday.

  443. FM accused of stabbing a woman for underdone potatoes
    FM upset over friend chugging all his beer ,things escalated
    FM slugs an elderly man who asked him to stop masturbating in the park<<ew
    #Best:

  445. May 19: Florida Man Runs From Cops in General Lee Dodge Charger After Setting Fire to His Wife’s Home

    Well, at least he did it with style, I guess…

  446. Mine isn’t fun. It requires trigger warnings just to be posted. If you absolutely must know search August 29 at your own discretion.

  447. Florida man arrested after another sex toy was thrown on the field during Bills-Patriots game.
    October 31st

  449. It works with Florida Woman, too: Florida woman accused of sickening child for 8 years (July 20)

  450. Florida man claiming to be God arrested after touching people, fighting with police, being tased

  451. May 1st:

    Drunk Florida man kicked out of library told cops he was Jason Bourne

    Love it – so funny x

  452. I Love this, going to use it in the next zoom family meeting 🙂

    Here is mine: A Florida man jumped off his surfboard and landed on a shark

  454. This is so fun! My search result: Florida man caught on camera licking doorbell.
    Too funny, should be an interesting place to live.

  457. December 30- Florida man arrested after officers watch theft of car on his Instagram feed..lol

  458. 20th November

    ‘Florida man arrested for having sex with miniature horse’

    ….I wish I never searched this now.

  459. Florida man accused of killing suspected ‘peeping tom’

    Wow, Florida man is wild ????

  460. Naked Florida man armed with a crossbow who claimed aliens were after him got shot by a deputy

    o_O

  461. January 14th

    ‘Kill ‘Em With Kindness’: Florida Man Stabs Neighbor With Machete Named ‘Kindness’, Say Police

    Erm.. That phrase has completely changed meaning for me now..

  462. February 17
    Florida Man Causes Thousands of Dollars Worth of Property Damage Trying to Kill “Demons …

  463. You can do this with any state, though Florida seems t have some great eccentric ones.

    Sept 29

    Florida man arrested for cutting the brake lines of over 100 e-scooters
    &
    Texas man shot fleeing burglar and went back to bed

  465. April 22nd
    Florida man slapped with Big Mouth Billy Bass singing fish after argument, police say

  468. Florida man accused of having sex with ‘Frozen’ toy at Target …. in the article Target had to let it go

  472. May 14 Florida man
    Florida man reportedly tells cops he thought playing basketball naked would ‘enhance his skill level’.
    Ha ha!

  474. Sept 7

    Florida man, drunk and naked, allegedly set house on fire in failed cookie baking attempt

    It… really works…

  475. Drunk Florida man accidentally shoots himself, blames it on robber.

    Are you really sure Florida is the place you want to go????

  476. December 15
    Florida man accused of masturbating in Walmart toy section turns himself in

  477. Florida man bought a giant fan in hopes that coming hurricane would cease if he created a strong enough wind with it.

  479. September 15,

    Florida man suspected of smelling woman’s feet at library …

    Not as bad as some of the others.

  483. Florida man tells neighbors he’s going to kill them with kindness then tries to kill them with a machete he named “Kindness”.

  485. There’s undoubtably going to be some variation from browsers, but I predict repeat headlines due to repeat birthdates…..how’s that go, something like, if you gather any random group of 23 ppl, odds are better than 80% that 2 of them will have the same birthday day. Hmm wonder if there’s a Florida Man story for that?!

  486. Wanted Florida man promised officers he would turn himself in when he was finished with his job. I wonder what his job was?

  487. December 20

    Florida man dressed as Santa caught with molly, ecstasy pills, and marijuana.

    Or better yet Florida man caught putting semen in coworker’s water.

  488. Hahahahahaha…..

    Florida Man Arrested After Offering Undercover Cop A Hamburger In Exchange For Sex Act

  489. Half-Nude Florida Man Wearing Underwear Marked “Breathalyzer, Blow Here” Arrested for DUI- that is a pretty classic headline

  491. May 24 (I picked this one as the other ones were not anywhere near light hearted)

    Florida Man’ uses alligator to shotgun a beer while cranking Skynyrd

    Oh goodness!

  492. 12 Sept Florida man

    Florida man shot dead after asking if bulletproof vest still worked

    oh dear- a bit unfortunate- are you sure you want to move??? Not that I have any idea if Texas is any better! Happy plannig anyway

  493. 31 October
    Florida man arrested after another sex toy was thrown on the field during Bills-Patriots game.

    Oh my..

  494. Hmmm, bit addictive this but ye gods…

    2019- Naked Florida man starts house fire after baking cookies on George Foreman grill

    2018- WATCH: Deputies say Florida man stole golf cart in slow getaway attempt

    I ran away screaming after 21 AUG 2019 Florida Man Arrested After Alleged Botched Castration Inside Home

  496. September 21
    Florida man charged with setting woman on fire after dispute

    Horrific. I’m not that surprised though, since 9/21 is also Stephen King and Bill Murray’s Birthdays too.

  497. April 18 – A naked Florida man in a Publix parking lot kicked trash cans and jumped on and punched cars while screaming “I only had one beer!” cops say.

  502. WCTV › tv › content › news › Met…
    Web results
    Meth smoking Florida man attacks mattress in jealous rage – WCTV

  503. Florida man climbs atop playground equipment at Clearwater park, tells kids where babies come from (for May 21)

    Simply hilarious..great start to day and now I know to ask Florida man if I need to know where babies come from. Who knew?

  505. “Florida man dies in explosion after attempting to microwave a microwave.”

    Oh dear.

  506. Mostly Nude Florida Man Cycling Backwards on Highway in Pink Sneakers and Socks…

    That takes talent.

  512. Florida man saves dog, fends off aggressive coyote attack with coffee cup –
    My kind of weapon

    In the interest of equality –

    Florida woman hops into elderly driver’s lap, tries to steal car

  514. 12 august

    Florida man sprays women with roach spray, break out nunchucks over loud music, cops say
    ????????????

  517. Florida man tries to steal vending machine from apartment complex. Must have been a slow news day in Florida Manlandia.

  518. Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza

    Good game!

  520. When I entered my birthday Florida man automatically popped up.
    June 6 , 2019: Florida man charged with pouring ketchup on his girlfriend .
    2018: police arrest Florida man after zoo animals found in his apartment.

    I love reading Carl Hiassen . He lives in Florida and is a reporter for the Miami Herald. His crazy mysteries are full of Florida weirdness.
    Love reading all the Florida man shenanigans.
    Great game .

  522. Derrick Irving, 36, and John Silva, 28, were both arrested after attempting to steal from a home and then erase the evidence with a fire started by a burning pot of Ragu sauce, police said. (Volusia County Jail) << wha?

  523. March 30: Florida man accused of attacking mom when she wouldn’t dress his mannequin

  525. October 8. Sarasota: Marc Jason Levene, a Florida man, was sentenced to five years in prison for possessing those explosive materials as a convicted felon. He also had to forfeit almost four tons of explosive fuses and flash powder.

  526. My birthday was apparently pretty busy.
    Florida man with ‘half a head’ arrested on attempted murder charges
    Florida man kills family friend for ‘trying to pick up’ his imaginary girlfriend (yikes)
    Shirtless Florida man removes 9-foot alligator from swimming pool

    These are hysterical.

  529. Florida men, one disguised in bull costume (!?) allegedly tried to burn down ex boyfriend’s house with spaghetti sauce.

  533. January 26 – Florida Man Finds a WWII Grenade, Places It in His Truck, Drives to Taco Bell (as one does)

  534. July 17th, “Police: Florida man’s murder was really elaborate suicide by balloon”

    ????????????

  535. Kevin, Gesa , happy birthday. We have the same birthday June 6th.
    There are a lot of June birthdays.
    And we love Ilona Andrews.

  536. February 3 – Florida Man Who Had Sex with a Dolphin Says it Seduced Him. Uh, yah. Right. Are you sure you want to move there? 😉

  537. Here’s mine – 19 june

    Florida man sets mousetrap to catch mail-stealing neighbor, snags mail-leaving postal worker instead

  540. “KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS — Florida man stabs neighbor with machete named Kindness.” ????????????????

    And happy belated father’s day to Gordon!

  541. Ya’ll are much braver than I. I love the Gulf Coast and once lived close enough to visit Galveston and Padre Island frequently. But after experiencing my 4th hurricane, I decided to leave the area. I cannot imagine buying a home in Florida, the insurance rates alone would be more than I could afford. I wish you well in your move and will help with your expenses as I buy your books.

  543. January 19 – FLORIDA MAN TRIES TO ORDER BURRITO AT BANK DRIVE-THROUGH, THINKS IT’S TACO BELL

  546. August 10 – Florida Man Arrested for DUI Says He Smoked Pot to Prepare for Jesus to Return

  547. DECEMBER 23
    Police: Florida man arrested for passing out marijuana ‘because it was Christmas’.

  550. 13 Nov Florida man dressed as Fred Flinstone pulled over by police for driving a “footmobile”

  554. Dec 24:
    –A Florida man that was arrested this past weekend after crashing his Dodge Challenger into a strip mall says that he was “time traveling.”
    –Florida man busted for handing out pot ‘because it was Christmas’
    and because the women are crazy too:
    –Florida woman with plastic gun robs mail carrier, rides off on tricycle, cops say

    Thanks for this. I’ve been crying for the last hour from laughing so hard!

  556. Florida Man claiming people were “eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase

  559. 9/4 Florida man parks Smart car in kitchen so it won’t blow away

    9/4 Naked Florida man starts house fire while baking cookies on George Foreman
    Grill

  562. July 2nd-Florida Man Accused of Putting Semen in Coworker’s Water

    Um…ew lol. But that was the first one that popped up!

  567. February 6th.

    Florida man tries to run over son who wouldn’t take bath, deputies say.

  570. Shirtless, bootless Florida Man drives motorcycle down I195 while laying down and driving with his feet, ????

  571. These are really a hoot!

    Mine is: November 12th, Naked Florida man revealed on video sneaking into restaurant and munching on ramen.

  577. Also on my birthday
    Florida man tries to break into jail, gets caught in the razor wire

    Florida man found posting detailed bomb making instructions on web sites frequented by extremists and terrorists

  578. “FLORIDA MAN FLASHES BUTTOCKS AT IHOP AFTER IMPERSONATING A POLICE OFFICER TO GET FREE FOOD,” & OTHER THOUGHTS ON FLORIDA AS HOME

  579. Florida Man Makes Himself A Snack While Robbing Taco Bell

    That’s not too strange. I would do the same thing. ????

  580. Florida man back in jail after not paying for taxi that picked him up from jail…
    lol

  584. “Florida man arrested after witnesses said he practiced karate on swans” Good God.

  585. April 26
    Meth smoking Florida man attacks mattress in jealous rage – WCTV

    Not surprising….

  586. Hahaha. Best thing all week!! March 13

    one dressed in bull onesie, attempt to burn down house with Ragu sauce

  588. Mine popped up with a coiple of alligator stories. This one shows just how tacky some people can be, though the story joted the shottun looksmlike itnis pointing AT the couple. That is one of the first things I checked (yes firearms safety is a big partnof my job) and aboutbthe only think they did right was jotnpointbthe gun at themselves…. although who knows where the muzzle is actually pointing and who might actually have been in danger….

    https://floridamanbirthdaychallenge.com/floridaman/february-9/

  593. Florida Man Arrested After Praising the Lord While Highway-Surfing His Cadillac
    The 70-year-old said he’d “rather go to jail than go back home” to his supposedly demanding wife.

    10/12

  594. Here is mine:
    Florida man in stolen ambulance leads law enforcement on multi-county chase

  595. September 21 Florida Group Home Worker Arrested for Leaving Man With Down Syndrome to Die in Hot Van While He Napped.

    That is sad.

  596. I had multiple funnies;

    Florida man accused of forcing small alligator to drink beer …www.boston.com › news › world-news › 2019/10/11
    October 11, 2019. PALM CITY, Fla. (AP) — Authorities say they’ve arrested a Florida man who provoked a small alligator into biting his arm and poured beer into …

    OR

    Man Arrested For Pelting His Mother With Sausages, Cops …www.thesmokinggun.com › buster › bradenton › man-l…
    October 11, 2018 … Ah yes, a good portion of millennials are just like this guy. Unemployed, lazy … Florida Man, not the hero you want, but the hero you need.

    OR

    Florida man wore female underwear, tried on baby clothes …

    OR

    Naked Florida man steals yacht’s flag

  597. April 25, Florida Man

    A Florida man was rescued after trying to ride a hamster ball to the Bahamas …

    • Darn “auto-corrupt.” That was supposed to tead “Meth Gators,” from flushing drugs down the toilet.

  600. May 23

    A Florida Man Was Arrested After Telling A Playground Full Of Kids Where Babies Come From

  601. Florida man stands in fire and chants gibberish. Mushrooms made him do it, says cops.
    My goodness, this game will become addicting….so many birthdays to try out.

  607. March 22nd Florida man

    Florida man shoved woman to get at her egg rolls, police say …www.miamiherald.com › news › state › florida › article228292044

  608. Floridaman punches Jimmy John’s employee because his sandwich took too long, wasn’t ‘Freaky Fast’

  610. Florida man tried to steal vending machine from apartment complex… maybe he had the munchies or it didn’t give him his change?

    • Oh this one is even better! Florida man loses his shorts while breaking into a car dealership (November 18)

  611. Florida man reportedly tells cops he thought playing basketball naked would ‘enhance his skill level’

  612. “Florida Man Shoved Woman Because He Wanted to Eat Egg Rolls in Her House, Claims She Slapped Him”

    He must really, REALLY like egg rolls ????

  613. OMG, such a fun internet game 🙂
    I landed on: Florida man entices gator to bite him; pours beer down its throat, police say

  621. I love Florida Man stories…

    “Florida man accused of having sex with ‘Frozen’ toy at Target”

  622. I got a couple of good ones

    January 25th Florida Man arrested for pointing lasers at planes

    or

    January 25th Florida Man arrested for attempting to “barbecue” child molesters.

  623. July 25 Florida Man:
    Florida man allegedly stabs alligator to death, tries to sell the meat – CBS News

  625. Florida man accused of forcing small alligator to drink beer (Sunday, October 13th 2019 )

  627. Florida man attempts to hide underwater from cops, gets arrested after coming up for air, police say

  630. Florida man arrested after praising the Lord while highway surfing his cadillac.

    This is fun!

  633. I have two amazing results…

    1. Florida man arrested for having sex with miniature horse on multiple occasions.

    2. Florida man arrested after police find drugs hidden in his belly button

  634. Police: Florida Man Found Asleep In Taylor Swift’s Bed Charged With Stalking

    also

    Florida man accused of shooting duck with bow and arrow

  635. May 1 Florida Man

    ‘Satan is still in me:’ Florida man stabs roommate in attempt to release Satan, turns knife on himself
    Man tried to make victim suck ‘worm’ out of his blood

  636. 14 June – Florida man accused of chewing another man’s face…….EWWWWWW!!!!!

  641. “Minutes after being released from jail, Florida man arrested in the parking lot for breaking into cars”

  642. February 29th

    Florida man claiming “people were eating his brains” leads police on insane golf course chase.

    Yep, sounds like something someone with half a brain would do.

  645. Florida woman escapes 600-pound camel in Louisiana by biting its testicles.

    The camel was at a truck stop. And it sat on her.

  646. Thong-wearing Florida man arrested while building shed with garbage on stranger’s property
    Or

    Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza

    I really couldn’t decide. Sorry.

  648. December 25 – Florida Man Had Exciting Year: Looking Back at 2018
    A 52-year-old Florida man used a stolen identity to pay for $40,000 worth of dental work and to buy a $10,000 puppy, the Volusia County Sheriff’s Office said. (WFTV.com)

  650. February 19th,
    Florida Man Arrested for Trafficking Cocaine-Stuffed Launchables in Ford F-150… O.o … Fuc** ** tongue twister ????

  651. Wanting to be an equal opportunity searcher:
    *Florida woman threatens hair salon with machete, poops in patrol car, deputies say Authorities took the 43-year-old to the Lee County Jail where she faces two counts of assault on a person 65
    *Florida Man Challenge March 5. A Florida man was arrested after asking officers if they found all his pot.

  653. Couldn’t find any laughs. Every one I found was just heartbreaking —
    like “Florida man arrested for animal cruelty fo dragging shark behind his boat.”
    That was the mildest one.

    The noon news here could be in reruns for a year and no one would know. Every day it’s the same ( except the corona count keeps going up and the testing locations open at 9:00 and are closed by 9:20. Each location in Lake Co. Fl. gets only 20 tests a day.)

    Instead of Florida man, we get an hour of “Datona man stabbed…” ” Orlando man shot…” on and on. Nothings’s worse than being stuck in Dr’s waiting room while the news is on.

  654. December 26 – FLORIDA MAN BIRTHDAY CHALLENGE
    Police: Florida man worried about vampires intentionally burns down his home.

    That’s a really bad move, there goes your threshold!

  656. Florida Man Tells Cop ‘That’s What She Said’ After Being …

    or the second one:

    August 29 Florida man accused of grabbing his genitals and

  658. Florida man who carried alligator into liquor store doesn’t remember the incident

  659. Oh man what a fun game….

    March 4, Florida Man

    “Florida Man Arrested for Throwing Cookie at Girlfriend”

    This one was for March 1 but showed up as well…

    “Florida man who allegedly threatened family with Coldplay lyrics ends standoff after SWAT promises him pizza”

  660. November 15th- Florida man accused of putting semen in coworker’s water
    Robert Tyson faces two counts of poisoning water with the intent to kill or injure.

  663. Oh my goodness! Are you sure you want to move to Florida?!?!
    5/18
    Florida man bit on tongue by rattlesnake he tried to kiss

  664. August 25, Florida man sprays women with roach spray, breaks out nunchucks over loud music. Lol, oh Florida.

  665. January 20 florida man

    Florida man attempts to hide underwater from cops, gets arrested after coming up for air, police say

  667. August 20 Florida Man Arrested For Botched Castration On Another Man He Met On Eunuch Fetish Website (OMG OMG??)

  668. My daughter got a better one from California –

    California man charged after allegedly stealing hearse with body inside and leading cops on a wild car chase.

    Her Florida one was

    Nearly nude man rides bike backwards on I-95.
    There’s a video to go with it of him in his speedo and sneakers.

    Or maybe it’s just that having lived in Florida once, a man in swimwear on a bike is an everyday occurrence.

  670. May 30 Florida man arrested after driving off from deputy, calling 911 to rub it in

  671. Florida man hits pregnant girlfriend with bag of tortilla chips over baby’s paternity

  672. Can’t post my Florida man birthday headline – not appropriate for all audiences. Still laughing, though.

  673. December 6

    Florida Man claimed “voices” told him “everyone in the world would die” if he didn’t kill his daughter.

    Yikes.

  674. Search Results
    Web results

    Police: Florida man wrecks liquor shop, blames ‘caterpillar …

  677. August 8, Florida man gets arrested for sex with dog

    Florida man asks employee at Walmart for anything that would kill 200 people…

    Are you really sure you want to vist?

  680. 6/3 Florida man

    Was arrested for throwing hamburger at pregnant woman then knocking her to ground.
    “I have problems and one of them is no cheeseburger “

  684. 26 August
    Florida man claiming to be God arrested after touching people, fighting with police, being tased

  685. In the ultimate “dick move,” Florida man kills his roommate and dog while trying to commit suicide by running car in garage

    • The headline (quoted) is funnier than the reality.

      Well, if you move there, you’ll have plenty of inspiration for weirdness in your stories. Imagine if only a fraction of this stuff makes it to the headlines.

  687. December 30th

    “Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House”

    I can see how that might happen…. LOL!

  689. “Florida man accused of cutting off penis of ex-girlfriend’s boyfriend.”

    Oh my gosh, I could not make this stuff up!

    • Hi, Stephanie, You and I must have the same birthday (19 Oct). Happy early birthday to a fellow Libra!

  690. September 21st, Florida Man

    “Neighbours complain about Florida man doing yardwork naked.”

  692. Sept 30th – Dude Punches Shark To Save Dog

    At least it was for a good and honorable reason!

  694. Of course I would get this guy –

    August 5th, 2018: Florida man arrested for attempted striptease at restaurant “When the woman asked him to stop, Jordan insulted her and threatened to fight her husband, according to court records”

  695. Too funny: March 9: Pregnant Florida Woman Reportedly Stabs Her Florida Man For looking at Photo of Another Woman

  696. October 5:

    A Florida gas station owner wants people to stop warming their pee in his microwave

  697. Florida man drove naked with wires on his penis. Is it weird I that Inwould have liked to have seen that? I wonder how he attached the wires …..

  698. ????????????

    “Unable To Wait Until July 4th, Florida Man Blows Off Fingers With Firework A Day Early”

  701. BDH woman’s brain starts melting into goo after trying to read too many Florida man headlines

  704. “Florida man claims to be ‘agent of God’, carries rattlesnake on-NBC2 News”

    This game is hilarious! I love it!

  706. Florida Man Arrested For Sexually Assaulting Stuffed Olaf In Target Store

  707. Florida man tells TV reporter he buried dead friend in yard: ‘I made a bad decision’ 4/16

  708. 21 May – Me
    Florida man climbs atop playground equipment at Clearwater park, tells kids where babies come from

    14 Jan – Husband
    Kill ‘Em With Kindness’: Florida Man Stabs Neighbor With Machete Named ‘Kindness’, Say Police

  710. https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://floridamanbirthdaychallenge.com/floridaman/april-29/&ved=2ahUKEwj2oPWjwJ_qAhXsknIEHbiRCZ0QFjAAegQIAhAB&usg=AOvVaw0tfxFVhxdAbsTiHbSNcadz

    https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.clickorlando.com/news/local/2020/04/29/florida-man-takes-upskirt-photos-of-woman-at-gas-station-is-caught-by-investigator-nearby-deputies-say/%3FoutputType%3Damp&ved=2ahUKEwj2oPWjwJ_qAhXsknIEHbiRCZ0QFjACegQIBRAC&usg=AOvVaw1bC3Fm8E-HlcXQYHcoyjag&ampcf=1

    Florida men seem to be losing their minds on my birthday so I just sent you one for this year and on for last year.????????????

  711. October 19th – Florida man accused of cutting off penis of ex-girlfriend’s boyfriend

    I would not have believed this until I did it. Poor Florida Man and all who know him!

  718. Naked Florida Man Performs ‘Strange Dance’ at McDonald’s Before ‘Trying to Have Relations With a Railing’

  720. November 26, FLorida Man

    Florida man charged with stabbing a woman with a fork over underdone potato

  721. June 16, Florida man throws samurai sword at sheriff’s deputies

    A Florida man is in jail after law authorities said he threw a samurai sword at deputies responding to a domestic disturbance call.

  722. Mar 21, 2019 · The March 3, 2019, video , posted to the Florida Man twitter page, has been viewed more than 250,000 times. One person replied.

    • WTSP › news › weird › wtflorida
      Web results
      Nearly naked Florida man rides bike backward on Interstate 95 in Miami | wtsp.com

  727. Florida man rips hole in store ceiling, steals 70 guns and escapes on a three wheeled bicycle.

  730. Florida man in green pajamas decides to eat pancake breakfast in middle of busy street

  733. LMAO. Mine was “Florida Man, 62, Strips, Performs “Strange Dance” At McDonald’s. Then Tries To Impregnate A Railing.”

  734. Oh dear….

    Florida Man on my birthday (Dec 1st): Florida man offered to pay officer with hamburger for oral sex, police say

    ***foreheaddesk***

  736. January 7th
    A Florida man denied syringes were his after jail officials found them in his rectum during a strip search.
    ????????????

  737. December 7th Florida Man: Florida man tried to pay for McDonalds with a bag of weed. Too close to real….

  738. Ha! Sure I can’t be the first to point this out, but you realize when you move, Gordan will become a Florida Man” 🙂
    Resist the crazy, Gordan! Hahaha

  739. On October 3, 2018, a Florida Man was arrested for making custom grills out of his house, according to WGNO. Apparently he didn’t realize that doing dentistry from your home was a bad idea, saying that “he considers himself ‘more of a jeweler. ‘”Oct 3, 2019

  740. Oh God ::wheezes laughing::

    July 2 – Florida man sits on gun, shoots himself in penis

  741. Florida man rigged door in attempt to electrocute pregnant wife.
    Wow, that is super dark.

  743. OMG… Please, please please, Can we have a short story of Curran, Kate and Conlan on a vacation in Florida???? I can’t even imagine the craziness you could come up with when you have these kinds of inspirations to pull from!!!!

  744. January 16

    Florida Man Says, “Jesus Told Me To” After Driving Ferrari Into Water

    He also told police, “Jesus made me the smartest man on earth and it’s so hard to have this much responsibility.”

    Thanks much for the laugh. Looking forward to sharing the game with my husband.

  745. MARTIN COUNTY, Fla. (WFLA) – A Florida man was charged with battery after he allegedly slapped his girlfriend in the face with a cheeseburger, TCPalm reported. Kyle Jamison Jones, 30, was arrested on May 4 after his 28-year-old girlfriend reported that he attacked her while she was sleeping

  746. May 27: Florida Man Arrested for Grand Theft After Trying to Walk Out of Store with AK-47s Stuffed Down His Pants

  747. May 25, Florida Man arrested for teaching kids where babies come from… at the top of his lungs

    … he was just doing a little PSA. I would’ve donated for his bail

  749. Florida Man Charged With Picking Magic Mushrooms While Carrying An Alligator

    …I have many questions

  750. Florida man arrested for loitering in neighborhood says he was checking security systems for President Donald Trump

    what a fun game! evil laugh

  751. July 3 Florida fisherman reels in big package of marijuana

    alternatively, for the strict Florida *man* format

    July 3. Florida man dies in explosion after attempting to microwave a microwave.

    Florida is wild, yo.

  752. Drunk Florida man kicked out of library told cops he was Jason Bourne

  754. November 24:

    Florida man tried to break into car filled with cops, officials say

    Florida man attacked by a ‘crazy squirrel’ gone nuts. And it was raised by a neighbor

    Florida man uses fake ID, steals $41K in dental implants, $10K for French Bulldog

    Florida man arrested after telling cop his name is ‘Ben Dover’

  755. FLORIDA MAN FLASHES BUTTOCKS AT IHOP AFTER IMPERSONATING A POLICE OFFICER TO GET FREE FOOD

  756. April 1 -Florida man facing charges after firing at roofers who interrupted his argument

  757. Hilarious!

    October 9th, Florida man.

    A Florida Man Is Arrested For Trying To Get A Caiman Drunk

  758. May 26 Florida man attacks his mom with spaghetti because “demons were in his head”

    BAHAHAHA

  759. Florida man January 12 Florida Man Tells Neighbors He’s Going to Kill Them With Kindness Then Tries to Kill Them With a Machete He Named “Kindness”

  760. June 28 – Florida Man Back in Jail After Not Paying for Taxi That Picked Him Up From Jail… 🙂

  761. First headline reads: “Florida man charged with battery after slapping girlfriend with CHEESEBURGER, deputies say.”

    There was also “Fugitive Florida man on bike hoped ‘hideous’ blonde wig would help him evade deputies, police say.”

    ????????????

  763. “Florida Man says his Turle Army will Destroy Everyone.”

    Wow.

    First result on the page and on my real birthday. I think I win this game…

  764. March 21st: Florida men, one dressed in bull onesie, attempt to burn down house with Ragu sauce, police say
    ????

  765. May 11 FLORIDA MAN ARRESTED AFTER HIDING LEGLESS, FUGITIVE GIRLFRIEND IN STORAGE BIN

    Words.Fail.

  766. NAPLES, Fla. – A drunk and shirtless Naples man was arrested at an Olive Garden Sunday after shoveling spaghetti into his mouth.

  767. If I read it in a novel I wouldn’t believe it…

    June 26th – Florida man accused of killing dancing flamingo is hit by truck and killed before trial

  768. December 30th: Florida Man Screaming About Vampires Allegedly Sets Fire In His Own House

  769. “Florida men, one dressed in bull onesie, attempt to burn down house with Ragu sauce, police say”

    This was the best idea, I can’t stop laughing , thank you

  770. October 31st: “Florida man takes epic mugshot after driving naked near school with wires attached to penis”

  771. Florida man tells cops playing basketball nude ‘enhances’ skills
    My favorite for mine because HELL NO I don’t want your privates on my person!!!????????

  772. Florida man climbs on playground equipment to tell children where babies come from

  773. January 12: Florida woman breaks into police station, eats officer’s dinner, police say.

    Florida man accused of stealing golf balls, beating golfer

    Florida woman shot after performing sexual act for Pringles and $5, deputies say.

    Police: Florida man threatens to kill neighbors with “kindness” (he named his machete “Kindness”)

    Florida Man Gets Death: Thought Man Wearing Alabama Cap was the Antichrist

  774. I hate that y’all are leaving Texas. I’m glad you are happy and enjoying new plans. Hugs.

  775. October 7th. Florida man accused of pouring beer down gators throat after enticing it to bite his arm.

  776. Florida men is accused of pouring beer into gator’s mouth after trying to entice to bite his arm

  777. A Florida man claimed to be threatened by vampires when he was arrested for dancing on top of a police cruiser.

  778. September 22, “Florida man rides manatee, dares police to arrest him, gets arrested”

  779. October 24 – Florida Man Arrested For Sexually Assaulting Stuffed Olaf In Target Store

  782. November 1 – Deputies:Florida man groped princess at Magic Kingdom

    What?! How does stuff like this?
    This is a fun game though. I’m going to share with the fam!

  783. I don’t have to look mine up as you and I have the same birthday. Thank you for doing all the work for us January 1st birthdays.

  784. December 28: Florida man drops stolen TV from get-away scooter.
    Ilona both of us are Capricorns!

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