It’s time for that post again.
It is no secret that the news cycle feeds us endless bad news. I haven’t checked mine this morning but I know what I will find: war, natural disaster, climate calamity, unemployment, retirees in poverty, a story about someone who had symptoms for a while ignored by doctors and now they are dying, and political think pieces that promise that collapse of everything we cherish and love is definitely imminent.
All the missiles in that negative barrage have one thing in common: they are uncontrollable.
Suppose something bad happens in your life. Some things truly make us feel helpless, like health problems, for example, but for the purposes of this post, let’s imagine something relatively minor. You broke your favorite coffee mug. Your tire went flat. Your dog seems to be lethargic. You can act on all of these events. You clean up the ceramic carnage and replace the mug. You put on your spare or spray one of those cans into your tire and go to the autoshop to have it replaced or repaired. You drive the dog to the vet and an hour and $300 later find out that they are being dramatic.
Whether or not the outcome is satisfactory, you’ve acted on the problem. You made an effort to control it. We cannot control what we see on the news. We cannot act on it. The most we can do is donate a little bit of money, but while that relieves a little tension, it mostly doesn’t help.
Over time, the exposure to this uncontrollable flood of negative news does three things to our worldview:
- Negativity becomes global. Everything everywhere is bad. In reality, for most of us life is a mix of good and bad things. But when we are fed the constant flood of negativity, we develop blinders. We stop noticing the good things.
- Negativity becomes normal. Meaning, we expect everything to be bad all the time.
- Negativity become internal. It’s not just the world that is hopeless. It’s us. We become hopeless. There is no point to try and change things in our personal life, things that we actually can and should control and act upon. We stop trying. This is called learned helplessness.
It’s a bad place to be. We start wondering if anything we do actually matters. It does. If you are wondering that right now, what you do absolutely matters.
There are three things you can do to make this better.
Turn off the news. Seriously. Remember, this is an algorithm. Once you read one negative story, it will try to feed you more. It’s insidious but stupid. For some reason, Meta decided that I am having fertility issues. It is shoving the fertility treatments at me in between crochet videos, bless its heart. I’m like, buddy, you’re not just barking at the wrong tree, you’re not even in the right forest.
Note good things in your life. When something good happens, pause for a second. If that coffee tastes delicious, pause and note it. If the silly squirrel on the tree made you smile, note it. You’re training yourself to notice good things again. It works.
Make something. Here is the thing: when I have an existential moment, I make a hat. They are fast and easy to knit or crochet. And at the end, I have a hat, a tangible object that I created, a proof that I made a difference. I put my hat on my head and it’s pretty and warm. And then I put my hat on my husband and force him to take a picture. Hehehe.
You don’t have to make hats. You can draw something. You can make breakfast. You can clean a cluttered shelf. Anything that will have a simple visual impact of your work. It’s proof of you making a difference. You are not helpless. Even reading a book will help, because it will take you out of your life for a few hours and at the end, the final page will give you a sense of accomplishment. Make a list somewhere and write a title of the books you finished.
Hang in there, BDH.
And if you would like some better news in your life, this channel usually does the trick: That Good Girl News.
My viewing of the news in general has been limited. Hard times
Hey I think I am #1!
First confirmed 🥇!
I never watch the news anymore but I still get feeds. I saw today Kris Kristopherson had died. (I got electricity back Tuesday and internet back last night.) My mother (who died in March) loved his song Why Me, Lord. At first it took me back and I was upset but then I thought about it and thought and now she can hear him sing it in person. Negative thinking happens but if you can find a positive angle it helps.
I quit watching TV news long ago.
This time of year I’m good. I’m cleaning up my yard and getting ready for spring planting. I’m putting my vegetable beds to sleep and planning for spring. I’m excited about Halloween and thinking about costumes and decorations.
Next month tho. Yes, Thanksgiving, but that’s mostly cleaning the house and fixing stuff which is not my favorite thing. So I do 30 days of thankfulness. Every day I’m forced to think of something good in my life. and it helps. Some days it’s hard but then my dog will be derpy or my kitten will be cute and it helps.
Hats are good. I’m working on a sweater.
That’s so spot on.
Create something, notice beauty and above all else move your body.
It’s that or insanity.
This post is basically all my CBT sessions condensed. Another thing you can do js write down or say something positive about yourself even if it’s as simple as “I am a nice person, I was polite today when I thanked Ilona for her post. I was friendly and shared my experience.”
I hope everyone can lessen their anxiety and feel a little better today.
I do my best to limit my exposure to negativity because you are absolutely correct. It feeds on itself and can become a cycle that is hard to break.
Positives in my life: playing mah jongg with my girlfriends while we drink wine and share our lives, hanging out with my partner while we both read books with music in the background, playing golf despite having physical challenges, seeing the results from getting exercise even if slowly but best of all is having loving and supporting family and friends.
My partner calls me his GHF (glass half full) girl – it’s a lovely compliment. 😊
Love.
It’s been a rough time and I really appreciate your post and kind words, suggestions.
💗
Thank you. This is exactly what I needed to hear right now.
Deep breaths and off to do some knitting.
I stopped watching and reading the news a long time ago for just the reasons you list. Good friends who follow the news let me know when there’s something I should read and I appreciate it.
I have learned that crafting, even for a few minutes, lifts my spirits, and I mostly work on small projects (hats, cowls, scarves, and lapghans/baby blankets) for our local Warm Up America chapter here in Northeast Ohio where winters are long and cold.
Recently I made a tiny and basic Emotional Support Chicken. Not the fancy version trending now, but this one http://www.mamainastitch.com/poppy-chicken-knitting-pattern/ with cotton dishcloth yarn and size 5 needles. Chicken Little (because the sky is falling 😁) is only about 3″ wide and rides around in my pocket. A friend having some health issues admired her, so another is on its way to her. Little things, but they help others know someone cares.
Thank you for this post, I think many of us appreciate the reminder to appreciate what we have and make a difference any way we can.
Both Ilona’s and yours–does this mean I need to learn how’s to knit bc I want this chicken?!?
Omg! I don’t knit but that’s so cute ! What a perfect baby shower gift etc…
Yes! Celebrate the good and the happy. All the small happies. The ability to sit in my cozy chair in the morning and leisurely sip my coffee before work. The feel of a cool breeze. The smell of a favorite candle. Listening to my favorite music.
The neural science of gratitude is fascinating if anyone is looking for a rabbit hole to go down.
Do a nice thing for someone else. Small, ninja kindnesses: The sneaky kindnesses that no one knows you did. Who brought the chocolate? Who swept my porch? That kind of thing. Of course, random acts of chocolate are always good.
I have a feeling the BDH is all over the whole read a book to feel better. I think we had a discussion on BDH comfort reads. One of mine is Innkeeper.
Celebrate ModR’s new avatar. Because that is ALWAYS fun.
Hehehe I went with Modacula again 🧛♀️
That! I want one!
Modacula knows all sees all within the BDH. Watch out! 😁😉😶🌫️
Thank you, Ilona – wasn’t there a god of small happinesses?
Yes! OMG that’s such a good article, I reread it often! https://ilona-andrews.com/blog/the-god-of-falling-short/
+1
Yes – needed this again!
A great reminder of the insidiousness of negativity, thank you! I’m going to forward this to one of my doom-n-gloom friends and then…. I’m going to pull out a skein of carefully hoarded yarn and go outside to find a sunny warm corner to sit with my tea and make something pretty. 🙂
As I sit here at my desk shaking over work stress, this is a wonderful message and a fantastic reminder. I need to focus on small positive events. And maybe do a craft. I am horrible at handwork but it might be time to try to relearn to knit and/or crochet again.
Thanks and have a wonderful day!
Oh, it absolutely does not need to be good or “productive” or commercially viable! That’s another thing that can be very skewed nowadays because of social media, monetising hobbies or having to produce things at a certain level.
I have two left hands, as every adult delighted telling me in my childhood, and still joyfully apply myself to the ugliest, most “Look, I made brown” paintings.
Lately, I’ve been doing it whilst streaming theatre plays (the National Theatre At Home website is amazing https://www.ntathome.com/products) and the combination scratches so many brain itches!
+1 to these comments about hobbies not needing to be “productive”
In the the US, at least, we’re so programmed that everything has to be worth money. It’s such a relief to have a hobby that is for nothing more than the pleasure and relaxation of doing a thing.
Happy hobbies, everyone!
I hope you feel better. Remember that you count and have a right to happiness in your life. Seems like there will always be people at work who will play power games to make themselves bigger and are happy to make everyone else miserable. I’ve certainly met a few over the years! On crafts, you might try making potholders. You can get a kit or buy cotton yarn and knit or crochet them. They are a fairly stress free project!
I’m a terrible crafter, but occasionally I pull out the adult coloring books that have mandalas and graphic designs and my colored pens. Doodling and coloring becomes meditative without feeling the pressure to ‘finish’ a bit g project 😊
Last week I cleaned up the piles of paperwork that were sitting on various surfaces, including the dryer. Now there is a glorious empty space on the dryer, and I have said “Behold, the beautiful empty space!!” several times since then. It does make a difference!!
Your hat model is cute, whether he wants to be or not! Love that shade of blue, and the hat looks very cozy!!
I so need to do this. Every year I say this would be a good winter project when it is cooler, gray and gets dark so early. And I don’t do it. Things have piled up. Maybe now, when I am trying to dodge political ads, would be a good time to just turn on some favorite music or an audiobook and sort and file or throw away. Something constructive.
I actually think things are looking up, except Kris Kristofferson died. He was 88 and had done a lot. I think it depends on what you focus on, and I know the people affected by Helene are REALLY focused on their situations.
This is such great advice. Every night my kids (they’re young adults now, but they still want to do our goodnight ritual) and I say, “what’s a good thing that happened today?” My son often starts with, “we didn’t die”, and we all agree that’s a good thing. Then we find the actual good thing and share it — sometimes it’s just “I got to that chore I’ve been putting off”. The effect of this nighttime ritual is that we actually look for and notice the good things because we have this assignment. I also keep a journal where I write the good things down — I’ve been remiss lately, but I plan to get back to it — and that has the same effect of calming me and making me notice the positives and that breaks the chain of negatives.
Thank you. I needed that today. And now I’m telling myself I that actually, today was a good day and even though I’m stupid tired now, it was fun!
We are lucky bc we are waiting for Baby2 — my niece’s second baby, after Grumblebaby, who is now 3yo.
So there will be joy shortly.
New life, whether human or animal or flower, is always great on your life.
I totally agree, the news cycle is insidious. Prices go up they go down. We all have to deal with it. I don’t need to be told the world is ending every 5 minutes. It’s like Kate’s Wedding, life doesn’t stop because the someone is coming to destroy Atlanta, lets all eat some cake.
I love that channel with the good news, have been following for a while.
I wish Instagram and Facebook had filters to shut down bad news. I’m not insensitive to the hardship that the floodings bring, but I’ve been intermittently crying all day for the many many clips thrown at me. And like you said, there’s nothing substantial we can really do about it. I tried letting go by working in the garden today, but the negativity is clinging.
Thank you this timely reminder! This is why I am so grateful that I have the support of my church for our weekly food pantry. I love seeing the faces of the clients that shop with us, seeing them take the donations we collect from our local stores, and seeing the volunteers enjoying serving our local community,
And, speaking of making I have been going through my craft room, creating fall jewelry and felt succulents for my vintage pots….
I love that hat! Not just the design, but the color.
I haven’t watched the news on tv in a long time, but I do check it on social media. I try to be aware that scary headlines get attention and help media companies stay in business, but I do also try to stay informed. I don’t want to bury my head in the sand.
One area I definitely don’t worry about as much anymore are the alarmist headlines about foods or beauty/skincare. I started following a lot of scientists and doctors and have learned that basically most health documentaries on Netflix are cherry picked BS and most articles on these subjects are either written by people who don’t truly know how to interpret scientific studies or the nuance is just not there. Fear sells. Anytime a scary new headline comes out now in those areas, I check with those scientists for the actual data and what’s going on to see if it’s worth worrying about.
I haven’t watched the news in over 20 yrs for exactly the reasons you list. The 4th estate feels goods news is not worth reporting. Add in the bias of the reporter/organization and what is said is not the exact truth either.
If someone really can’t live without the news that’s their option, I will read a good book instead.
Right now, I’m having a hard time. My entire department got laid off, and because where I live the notice period is 3 months, we get to go to work for those 3 months, knowing there is unemployment ahead of us, and still try to summon the motivation to actually do your job. The only two that escaped the purge is the one that mothers the entire office floor, and the guy that’s the heart of our team. Everyone one feels awful, and for some reason, despite living with this for almost a month now, this week it hit everyone hard. I’m having massive anxiety, people are mad, irritated, sad, just terrible all around. So we spent a lot of our working hours today talking about insurance, my teammate’s supernatural ability to get asked out on 3 dates by coworkers on the same day, cats, our company’s utter incompetence at communication, competed on the most awful things we stepped in barefoot (I won, still-warm cat puke is hard to beat), sent each other job openings, and showed off the stress shopping we did. All of that is to say, life may be awful, but it’s good to remember that we have company in our misery, and that just makes it all a little easier to bear somehow.
Does the company expect any work from your department? I would be cleaning out my desk and spending every moment trying to find a new job.
I watch the local news mainly to learn about what’s going on in the community and find out about the weather. I also go to two online sites when I want to find out more information. I am not on social media because I knew it would drain me.
If I start to feel yuck about things going on now, I remember my mom telling me to get my mind off the negative that’s everywhere. I remember asking her what I should do. She said to do something that distracts the mind. So, I did. I read a lot. When that wouldn’t work, I would sew, cook, clean, and/or bake. There were times I just go outside, take a deep breath and hear the birds sing. I still do all of that to this day. It works to keep my mind calm and at peace. 🙂
Thank you for all the positive difference your work makes in my life!
Hi Ilona, have you heard of the game Reka? It’s in early access so it’s a bit buggy, but I’m super curious as to what your opinion on the lore and cultural accuracy it might have. (Also if you’d find it fun, I find it quite endearing in a goth-y way).
I haven’t watched the news for many years now. It was too negative for me. At first, I felt guilty for ignoring it. Like I wasn’t being a good national or world citizen by not following it. But when you realize we only get a small portion of what goes on and we have no choice in what it is, it’s easier to ignore it. I wouldn’t let a random stranger put an unknown spoonful of something in my mouth, why would I let them put something in my head? If I want to know about something, I do my own research.
I also don’t scroll through social media. This is as close as I get to scrolling. I will go on FB and go right to a is particular place I want to see, but avoid the rest. If you do like to use it, block or hide all the negative people. Even if they are family or friends, if they are very negative, don’t feel bad about hiding them! You can always go look at the people you blocked and you won’t be bombarded with all their stuff when you aren’t prepared.
Sometimes, blocking negativity even means cutting yourself off from people who aren’t good for you. If you need to, do it.
Remember, it’s not selfish to prioritize your own mental health. The world will still be there when you’re ready.
I needed this today. Thank you.
I have a new puppy.
How can you be negative when you watch the world through a baby’s eyes.
Dark area…scary.
Sleeping wasp that stung my paw…ouch, ouch, loud scream.
Vet lady…nice liver treats and belly rubs.
Small bird…wow. Seagull…bit frightening.
People I’ve not met before…rollover and have my belly rubbed.
Other dogs…sometimes scary but sometimes exciting.
Flower pots and dirt…yummy.
Feathers…leaves…flowers…this place is endlessly fascinating.
praying for Gordon’s family, praying for everyone affected by Helene. Donating plasma this weekend.
peace everyone
I learned when the DH was in Iraq to step away from the news. I check the local news sites online because it was better for my bloodpressure.
Today I took the rug shampooer to the trash. I left it available with a sign that it works. But this thing has been cluttering my parents’ closet for years. They no longer have carpet. We replaced it with tile and vinyl when we moved here five years ago. My mom wanted to keep it. To maybe shampoo the rug someday. Right. There it sat, taking up space and being IN THE WAY of things we needed to put in the closet. It is now gone. It is a very small thing in my very busy life where I have to take care of many little and many big things. It will matter only the tiniest bit. But it is my great and wonderful accomplishment for the day. It will not solve any world problems. It will not get mom her shower for the day, it will not fix meals, it will not mean the dishes are washed. BUT IT IS GONE! 🙂
Yes! Did this with 2 window air conditioners that died years ago and have been sitting in a corner for over a year. Feels so good. More needs to go but this was a start.
Thanks, I needed the reminder 🫂
That was some good advice. It some times helps a lot to focus on the little things you. Not everything has to big gestures.
And a smile for a neighbour or the person in the store goes a long way.
I had to shut the news off because I couldn’t take even one more bit of news out of the ME. I couldn’t handle it. So I shut it off and have been meditating and reading and doing all the things that don’t involve news.
Excellent advice. I agree wholeheartedly. Yes to hats!!! And remember whether its — news or meta or the dark web, they are all making money from fixating your attention on misery to keep you coming back for more. The way you can fight back is give them fewer eyes. While doing what you can to make your corner of the world better.
That hat is beautiful.
This is great advice and something that I really needed to hear. Thank you
This was me yesterday. I want to change the light bulbs on the back porch, they broke off. They were full of water and fused to the outlets. Removed the fixture. Bought a new one. Had it all connected when I realized the screws to connect it to the eaves were all wrong.
Drove all the way back to the hardware store. They don’t have anything to make it work. In a snit, decided to weed the driveway. That way I could see myself accomplish something. Five minutes later it started raining.
Finally went back inside and swept and mopped. The hand vacuum, which is battery powered, died. Both of them. Gave up on that and pulled out the big plug in. Finally, accomplishment.
Thank you for writing this thoughtful article. Sometimes, when it seems there are not enough good things to look forward to any more; thinking of your books that will be coming out makes all the difference.
You and your work matters.
My 93 year old aunt lives in East Tennessee/Johnson City next to the Nic…. river that flooded. It lies 83 feet from her front door and that is mostly vertical, so the river stopped at her front door steps. She is one of the lucky ones who has power. The two bridges near her house are out so she is homebound. She has water and food for two weeks, and my cousins are in touch daily with her and hope to get to her soon. I have been so consumed by this catastrophe with how many people are in need and how bad it is. I hope FEMA will find more funds to help people. It’s heart breaking. In the meantime we are making donations to one of the organizations that Illona posted and trying to focus on other things. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE REMINDER about negative news and how it does get fed back to you via your computer and how it can make one feel so depressed. I love all your suggestions and can’t wait to check out the Happy Girl You Tube site. I love to cook and love comfort food so fell in love with this super EASY Marinara recipe and made it in 10 minutes this week. Easiest one EVER and also love the review suggestions
https://www.foodandwine.com/recipes/tomato-sauce-onion-and-butter#:~:text=This%20Tomato%20Sauce%20with%20Onion%20and%20Butter%20recipe%20by%20Marcella
I hope your family in West NC has been in touch and are ok!
Take care!
I agree with this post a lot, and this is why I’m currently rereading both Hidden Legacy and Innkeeper, they’re books that I enjoy!
I also have some Fall Fiber Festival plans for this weekend, meaning I have a list of knitting patterns I’m seeking yarn for, and a top whorl spindle on my list. (I figured you could appreciate the excitement of this plan 😂).
I like your? Gordon’s? hat a lot too, it’s a beautiful colour and the pattern reminds me of my Nan (she taught me basket weave stitch when I was a child, and this makes me think of it).
I went to visit my daughter. We had lunch. I had brought her a bike from my aunt, and she gave me a jar of mint and apple jelly she had made and a hat she had knitted. It was lovely, all of it. No bad news, just chat. I will do it again this month!
True – I make up cycled feedsack tote bags from my chicken food. I also watch our ducks having a bath on the paddling pool we have for them – hilarious
There’s a newsletter called Fix the News that researches good news from around the world–medical advancements, human rights triumphs, environmental wins–and delivers them to your inbox every week. A lot of them are things that are basically not reported in our mainstream news cycles, and sometimes they’re huge deals! And there are actually so many good things happening all over! I haven’t been a subscriber long (no affiliation, just a fan!), but I love how it shifts the lens and the focus toward agency and hope.
Thank you
This post made my day a little better and I’m going to try and take your advice to heart. Thank you.
Here’s one: The average age of virginity loss is now 17 for females and 18 for males. The US teen birth rate (births per 1,000 females aged 15-19 years) has declined 78% from 1991 to 2021. Smoking is at an all time low and continues to drop. Gen Z alcohol use is MUCH lower than every generation prior to them. They also have the lowest credit card debt numbers of any of the last three generations. I’m proud of this new generation, they are giving me hope.
The flood of negative news is nothing new, because ‘bad’ news sells. A bus never just leaves the road; it PLUNGES over a cliff!! Even if said cliff is just the edge of the pavement. Man, that was one steep edge….. Not to ignore any tragic outcomes, but yes, stopping to smell the roses is worth the couple of seconds it takes to pause & enjoy something pretty. Right now where I live the leaves are rapidly turning color & falling. Fleeting beauty, treasured because the time when one can enjoy it is so short. Most people have a favorite season. Mine has always been autumn. There is just something about that crisp air that makes me feel alive.
Love this, thank you!!! was cleaning up things in the yard after the storm and saw an amazing butterfly just hanging around enjoying life (and letting me get pictures). it sometimes really is all about the small awesome things.
I also love the fact there’s a butterfly called ‘Red-spotted Purple Butterfly’ that is mostly black with this electric blue when it opens its wings (had to Google the name after i took pictures)
forgot to add the butterfly picture!
https://imgur.com/a/got-awesome-visitor-yard-red-spotted-purple-butterfly-l18uHng
Gorgeous!
also see web site:
reasons to be cheerful
Thank you Ilona, this is quite helpful.
I’m pregnant and once I downloaded the pregnancy apps, the algorithm decided I needed to be shown everything that could go wrong in a pregnancy and during childbirth. It was my worst nightmare come to life specially as I’ve had multiple losses in the past. It horrified me so much that I, for the first time in my life, deleted all my SM apps as to get as far away from it all as possible.
Life without the constant negative feed has been so peaceful. During the past 4 months I’ve found time to read more, and like you said take time to notice the little everyday joys in life.
I’m now tempted to take up crocheting. I read that its a calming activity. Perhaps I will be able to learn to make a tiny plushie in time for the baby 🙂
((Hugs for your losses))
Lovely, much needed reminder! Like the post about the God of Falling short, it’s right on the nose. It reminds me also of a quote by Mr. Rogers about how to look at bad news around us… “When I was a boy, I would see scary things in the news. My mother would say to me look for the helpers. You’ll always find people who are helping.” Let’s be helpers.
I can’t knit to save my life but put a needle and thread in my hands and I’m a happy camper.
And I LOVE the good news girl and have been following her for a while. @davidzinn is another that never fails to make me smile. And if you really want a lighthearted story and could use a virtual spa trip, try https://www.instagram.com/reel/C-QLgGRoDzI/?igsh=MWk3MnRkYmJramJycg==
“Look for the helpers”. THIS.
Thank you, Ilona, for taking the time, effort and compassion to lift up the Horde when you have been working through life challenges as well! You are truly a gift to the Horde (and those the Horde loves) – as lifting us up helps us lift others as well!
Sending peace, health and safety to the House Andrews, Mod-R and the Horde!
Gordon’s eye-Brows!! Some coward called code enforcement on some neighbors and us: this time we got a reasonable & helpful officer. Various issues kept me from getting further along on yard maintenance since 2 car crashes in 2017, less than 4 months apart. So after pulling the sowthistle in our yard with the new buffalo hide gloves, I did those in my older neighbors’ across, north, south the alley across the street, and the more senior lady at the kittycorner corner, and tried to reach over her fence for the ones there(locked & unclimbable for me). I’m giving the new couple some time to settle into their recently bought house, that the frontyard was done 5 weeks before they arrived, but have let them know that their backyard needs my gloves & work. Instead of lashing out at the suspect, have done what needed doing, with what I had, to help with the most wicked weed, so that everyone can do the less injurious weeds themselves. Didn’t ask for funds, but accepted what anyone offered. Got my vitamin D, got more neighborly, and soon will do more to further the butterfly/hummingbird/bee environment in the frontyard, in the few hours a day my body would permit. Hope this makes for more smiles! : ))
I hear that!! During the previous pres election, I stressed to the max, lost some 50+ years friendships and said never again. I stopped watching and reading the news six months ago. I read the odd bits that catch my attention daily and that’s it. Let me tell ya, it’s great. Somehow I still manage to keep up with most world events just scrolling past them. It’s quite sufficient and I’m not stressed out.
Good advice, yes. I’m glad you’ve relaxed at least a little.
I subscribe to several of the good news sites around the internet.
I have Sunday for one of the groups on DailyKos, and between blathering about my daily life and a relatively long list of links to different stories I find on those sites, and recipes from several different places, and the occasional bit of archaeological news, I never have any difficulty writing my diary.
Love the hats! I recently finished a hat that was my longest standing UFO (unfinished object): a hat which was my mom’s 3rd attempt to teach me how to knit.
My mom passed 19 years ago, so this hat has been lurking in my craft room for almost 20 years. Anyway I got some good knitting advice and finished it. Possibly the last thing I will ever knit (I’m more of a fabric person) but it is done and will always remind me of my mom. And keep my head warm. Both good things.
Thank you for the post. I rarely watch the news because of the negativity and hopeless feelings it gives me. the first hurricane pictures I saw were the ones you posted and I felt extremely oblivious. your post reminded me of why I limit the bad news intake. your books always make me happy. in between your releases I read them all over again.
I crochet when I want to uplift my spirits and I don’t watch the news ever unless it’s to get an update on a storm (I live in Florida). I recently started crocheting flowers and giving them to my friends to spread the joy. I did tulips for a friends birthday last week and a red rose for someone who has always been loving and helpful today
Thank you; I really needed to hear someone to say what I was thinking. Take care. I’m going to try to finish knitting something. Peace be with you and yours.
Thank you for this. PSA. I don’t watch news, at all. I scan home pages (yahoo usually, sometimes MSN). Mostly to make sure anything I think it truly worth reading (re Hurricane Helene) is found and read or at least, noted.
No TV. No news channels.
Then I spend my day, in between work and cat videos, being grateful and noticing beauty.
This is my life and spiritual practice. I would not survive if I consumed a diet of news.
I’ve been watching reruns of comedies instead of the news. I’ve been sewing like crazy and going on walks. It really does help to take a break from the news sometimes! For good news, people are still having baby showers, my neighbor’s day care kids are happy and greet me when they see me doing yard work and my doctor said to come back in a year! I hope everyone can find joy in their lives wherever they can find it. It really helps when you point out ways we can feel more positive about life in general! Thank-You! Also, I love the hat!
Life is short, live it.
Love is rare, grab it.
Anger is bad, dump it. Fear is awful, face it.
Memories are sweet, cherish them.
Another source of good stories! https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/
I can do the news. I also have a clear idea of what I can control and what I can’t. it’s part of my coping toolbox for anxiety. I look at what I can’t control as interesting and try to weave it into my “people are fascinating and complicated with long memories” fabric. i like thinking about what drives the emotions and what built that foundation. I think about how people cope with their rage and pain and desperation and greed.
And of course, while I can’t remember hearing this advice directly from Mr. Rogers I am always looking for the helpers.
I stopped watching the news years ago and have never regretted it, not even once. If it’s important, a friend or family member or the work grapevine will tell me; but they will share it with appropriate gravity and/or emotion (whether that be joy or sorrow or outrage or laughter). One of the things I hate about the news is how they blow small things out of proportion and big things get beaten to death, the same information rehashed a million times because there’s nothing new to report but the viewers are obsessed with the possibility of some new tidbit. Everything is ground down into an anxiety-ridden monotone sludge. Yuck.
I often give feedback about ads I don’t want to see and after a few corrections I do see a difference. Sometimes you have to bop the algorithm in the nose.
Donating does make me feel better because I know that I’m not the only one and I picture our donations linking us together in a human chain of love and caring.
I have a friend who makes hats for homeless people (he’s in Oklahoma and they have a program). Other friends donate yarn to him.
Your books both provide distraction and teach solid values even while entertaining us. (Not in a preachy way) They are a lifeline.
when times are challenging and I start to feel overwhelmed, I find it really helpful to go for walk and just clear my head. I focus my attention on the nature around me and think of ways I’m blessed. it helps to keep me grounded. yeah things can get hard but everything is temporary. 🫶
Trying to get over a very bad period of my life, I thank you for your words with all my heart.🙏
Best wishes to you. You are not alone.
I stopped watching the news, and carefully curated my instagram feed to only be about non threatening, fashiony cool nerdy stuff (it isn’t foolproof, but it’s a start) but even so, this blog post warmed my heart, made me giggle (the hat is really nice) and made me tear up a little.
So, now, I’ll share my good news, as well. I petted a really cute dog at the coffee shop, my own husband is giving its all to building us our dream flat (well, he is currently tearing walls down but all the same) and my own business is okay, even though these are difficult times all around the world. I really enjoy listening to the GA version of Kate Daniels while scraping ancient and ugly wallpaper off my future bedroom walls, and re-re-re-re-reading Hidden Legacy as a little treat.
Nothing is perfect, nothing ever will be, I’m thankful for your books and blog posts, as they bring me strength, joy, and escapism 🙂
Thanks for this! I keep a gratitude journal and that helps because I am noting things through the day. And I occasionally have a news-fast 🙂
Thank you for sharing this. I’ve been having a really rough time lately, general life stuff, and trying to be positive just seems like a step too hard right now.
Before I read your post, I had just cleaned part of my kitchen, and now I’m desperately trying to get to sleep. Here’s to having some kind of good day ahead(?)!
Sorry if this post makes no sense, it’s after 2am here, and I think I’m semi-delirious.
I’m so sorry, Kat! Insomnia is such a torture, and it’s unbelievable how many things get affected once you can’t rest properly.
I hope you manage to reset and sleep will come!
When I can’t sleep I try concentrating on mentally playing a waltz in my mind. I know it sounds odd but I personally find the waltz tempo calms my heart rate and it keeps me from dwelling on stuff. Donna’s Waltz by London Barndance Company is one I memorized. There are lots of them. I hope you are having a better day!
Amazing and encouraging advice. Thank you for reminding us that there’s always good and bad and that we can survive it by not fixating on the the things we cannot change and instead change what we can in our own corner of influence.
Due to liking a quote from Epictetus, I’ve gotten interested in reading on Stoic philosophy. Here is one in which he addressed that subject:
“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” Epictetus
Eh, I wasn’t going to add this one, but I find myself forced to:
“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can’t control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible.”
Dear Ilona
You are so right! The news is full of bad things and it seems there is even more war all the time. Only depressing News.
What also helps me (I am not crocheting): I am doing yoga. I started in Corona when I felt always stressed and so tense and helpless – and in Germany we have a wonderful Yoga teacher doing Yoga in Youtube (Mady Morrison). She is super positive, and every time she ends in telling you to Thank yourself that you took the time to do something good for yourself. I am computer scientist, very rational and found that a bit strange at the beginning. Now I love it, and enjoy the positivity.
Whatever helps you to notice the good in the world, take the time to do so.
Cheers from Germany,
Ami
Thank you! This helps💗
THANK YOU!
And, for most of us in the BDH, we can vote.
Not just for the national offices, but for our friends and neighbors running for local offices.
It is a difference we can make collectively.
My neighbor and I coax each other to go swimming at least once a week and congratulate ourselves when we make it to two days. It is an indoor pool, but sometimes that water feels darn cold when we get in, but the sauna after makes up for that! We are both retired and she uses a walker. It is our joyful time together!
Thank you! That was a much needed post!
What a good reminder. We all need those once in a while. Happy Friday!
Love the hat. Is the pattern available somewhere?
The Salvation Army used to give out a pattern for a watch cap.
That pattern was a translation from a Russian site, but I found one very similar on ravelrly. https://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/winter-cable-hat
Sorry to bother you with that, but what about the hat Gordon is wearing in the picture?
The one that looks like it is a waffle stitch pattern?
I looove that pattern so much!
Is it available somewhere?
https://nimble-needles.com/stitches/the-waffle-stitch-knitting-pattern/
This is the stitch. It’s a multiple of 4. Gordon liked the reverse side better, so it’s actually inside out.
Take any pattern for a hat that you like and make sure that you cast on 4x stitches, so let’s say 80 stitches for worsted. Do a rib of your choice, and then just do the waffle stitch to required length, and then start decreasing.
Here is a free waffle hat pattern that is very similar: https://thirdbaseline.blogspot.com/2008/01/back-in-yarn-stash-again.html
thank you so much! :)))
I have been watching Dr Glaucomflecken short videos on YouTube to cheer up a bit. He makes very funny skits about hospital life, the many specialists doctor who have each a particular cliché character, which seems to be the same in every hospital. He also explains clearly American the insurance system in the same funny way (and I’m really horrified by what I learnt. Thanks my parents I’m European).
Hope it can also make other people laugh.
Thank you so much for this post. It’s so timely for me. The world seems to be drowning in misery & terror at the moment & I’ve felt so helpless, but equally I’ve not felt comfortable ‘ignoring’ someones’ pain. You’ve helped me to reframe how I’m feeling, so thank you.
We can drop those hats (sweaters and blankets) off at a homeless shelter
here in Canada, and they help folks keep warm and make them smile a bit.
Winter is coming.
Thank you. I needed the reminder.
Thank you for the warm feeling in my heart and the smile I have on my face right now, Ilona. I don’t know how you always manage to ost these types of things just when I need it the most, but you do. You guys most definitely make a difference too! 🥰💕💕💕💕💕
Thank you! Love the hat!
Exactly what I needed.
I read somewhere that resonated with me, and that I still think about.
We were never meant to know everything going on everywhere. Just think… Before the 1900’s, we mostly just knew what was happening in our village, our neighborhood, and maybe because of a newspaper, we could get the news that was happening on a limited basis around the world. All this instant knowledge of all the terrible things happening world wide is so bad for us.
Thank you for being a positive light. I feel like you helped get us through the pandemic with snippets. You make so much difference in our lives.
Thank you so much for being a light in the darkness! I needed this post today.
Loving it! Hat and advise:) Thankful for this channel.
100% whole heartedly agree. I had my first baby in 2020 right at the start of the pandemic and the constant barrage of negativity made my postpartum depression and anxiety spiral out of control. I quit watching the news and shut out the world for a while and it was the best thing I could have done. even now I tune the vast majority of it out. I don’t have the capacity to be angry over everything all the time so I make my positive impacts where I can and focus on my family and friends.
Love the hats! I’m a crochet girly myself and now I’m thinking my kids need cute matching hats for winter 🙂
While I believed the news right now it’s really important, this post is amazing and wonderful and I can’t thank you enough for it!
Thanks. I needed that.
❤️ genuinely helpful.
That good girl is also on TikTok. Jenn is a delightful person.
Hats are one of my go to coping mechanisms too! I always have a few projects on my needles, but there’s nothing like a hat when you need to feel you’ve accomplished something in a short span of time. Getting outside is good too. As the kids say these days, touch grass.
Lovely. thank you Ilona, you help in many ways. A very, very good read.
Beautiful hat. I also like the version with the pompom. And the color is perfect.
I love this post! 💕 and for me it is knitting socks 😅
Great tips on dealing with negativity! I read books to escape the craziness and negativity. And I reread favorite books (including yours)! So thank you guys also for all your amazing stories that help us get through everyday life! Sending lots of love and hugs your way!!!!
You are so right ,turn off the news.
After more than 4 years I managed do come down with covid just after Helene hit. I was pretty out of it for the first couple of days but since then I’ve rediscovered a pleasure I had forgotten. Reading and nothing else. No music. No TV. No conversations. No phone. No tasks. No distractions. No interruptions. I had somehow forgotten how peaceful and centering this is. I have gotten used to reading amid chaos.
When did our world become a place where sensory overload was the norm?
Covid forced me to slow down and has given me a lot to think about.
Thank you. This is a good reminder for me to unplug and get outside more. Also to check in with my family and friends.
Excellent post – love the hat!
The model may not give it back!
Studies have proved if you do something 21 days in a row it becomes a habit. So I totally agree do something that makes you smile every day and you will feel a lot better. I read somewhere that if you say an odd word like “pizza|” every time something makes you smile at the end of the day you will be surprised how many times you said it!
With a small addendum here that if you are neurodiverse, this habit forming may not come this easily or even at all 🙂.
No one needs to beat themselves up if things are still frustrating after a while.
Thank you ModR for this addendum and reminder!
Anyone have any good news news channel that can go in my news feed? So need it right now.
Thank you. These days it’s easy to be overwhelmed by the negative. Your advice reminds me to seek the positive. I also get joy from knitting.
Wonderful, as always. Retired now. Make hats! Lots of hats! Donate to charity. About never feel negative. Adding to the world in a positive way.
Giving up the news and (almost) all social media is one of the best things I’ve ever done for myself. I did it for physical health reasons, because my adrenal system isn’t being its best self since I had Covid, but the benefit to my mental health has been (unsurprisingly) profound. I still give money to organizations doing the work that needs to be done, and I will continue to vote conscientiously, so I really don’t feel like I’m shirking any responsibilities by not standing in front of the fire hose of despair and negativity every day.
Thanks from me too, I try to think positively and practice mindfulness every day. I am a crafter too, cards, diamond dots, cross stitch and other stuff. I am going on holiday on Sunday so this week is more joyful than most!
Thank you for the reminder. Its one of the reasons I love romance novels because if the HEAs. I get harped on by folks who read more “lofty” novels, but I often remind them I do read/watch the news and that is depressing enough. Let me have my happy 😊.
Now I have to teach this to my ADHD/ anxious 10yr old. In an effort to keep the kids up to date part of social studies requires them to read/or watch the news and write a few words on what they saw. I try not to shelter him too much but I’ve been steering him to science section mostly about space because trying to explain politics to a kid is rough.
We’ve already had the inevitable face off with racism earlier than expected last year, so I’m trying to keep his little fast moving mind and big feelings as safe as I possibly can for the next few years at least.
Go Mom! You are doing a good job. Keep reading whatever you want.
I have forever believed that the 24 hour news cycle…SO MUCH information – most of it about which we can impact not one bit….our psyches were never meant for this. So yes….stay sufficiently informed to educate and “protect” yourself….but otherwise TURN IT OFF
Thanks for this, Ilona. I needed it. We got chomped by Helena, and we have no idea when we will get power. But my parents and family are safe, and this Apple whatzit chai is good
I don’t watch the news regularly. I see stuff online and it’s depressing. I am visiting a friend i Toronto for her birthday and she surprised me with a knitted beanie. It will come in handy when I visit Quebec City next week.
Creating stuff is a wonderful way to de-stress and walking outside is also another way – leave the headphones on and listen to nature and the sounds of life.
My husband worked for newspapers for over 20 years which is how I learned this.
No one in the news business is kidding when they say “If it bleeds, it leads.”
Blood, tears, agony, and tragedy are what sell so that’s what they push.
School board hearings or your local zoning committee meeting even though that matters far more to your daily life than an earthquake a thousand miles away?
BORING!
What’s more is that each news outlet has a daily budget meeting where the editor (it doesn’t matter what form the outlet takes: digital, radio, tv, print, daily, weekly, monthly, etc.) decides what is going to fill the news hole.
A big news hole equals more news, preferably dramatic and bloody.
A tiny news hole equals less news and it’s even more important that it be dramatic and bloody in order to sell newspapers or grab eyeballs or collect clicks.
Because so much news exists, a given news hole — every single day of the year — can be filled five to ten times over.
That’s why your editor picks and chooses based on what they think will sell newspapers or tv news or online sources.
Never forget: if it bleeds, it leads.
A lottery winner (bad lotteries like a cancer diagnosis at age 15 are tremendously rare and thus tremendously great at selling papers) is far more interesting than an also ran.
thank you. it is so easy to hear the news and feel overwhelmed. I needed that reminder. now I’m going to listen to “Clean Sweep” and knit a hat.
Love Gordon in the hat! It’s always better to laugh than cry.
You are SO right! Those are basically the things I did in order to “force” a more positive outlook on myself as I battled cancer 13 years ago. IT WORKS! I’m here, still kicking, and still enjoying my life to the fullest, no matter what else gets thrown at me.
I love the hat suggestion. For me it was jigsaw puzzles, and other people will have other stress-relievers.
I hope you have a wonderful day, an excellent week, and a happy month, free of excess stress.
Thank you for your post. Perfectly timed and incredibly helpful. existential dread has always been a bed-fellow but this week it’s eclipsing all else. The world is better having House Andrews in it, which we all already knew but …Thank you for your storytelling and for your non-fiction writing like this post.
Excellent Advice!
I love this! I too stay away from the news. I only follow folks on fb who are fun, funny and putting positivity in the world.
Love the hat! I noticed the little white ball is no longer on it when Gordon modeled it. heehee!
You might want to buy Factfulness by Hans Rosling. It has loads of facts that prove that the world is a better place than you think. I dip in whenever I am down and it cheers me up.
Michaels recently had all yarn on sale 30% off. I took that as a sign and bought plushy soft yarn in fall colors. Enough to make a throw for the end of my bed. Not as portable as a hat but still keeps my mind busy and happy.
Thank you for the reminder.
That’s why on bad days, I will re-read Magic Claims or Sweep of the Blade. The triumph at the end just makes me happy.
♥️
Super useful post. Thank you.
For news I stick with the national paper I’ve read since my youth. It has lots of “joy snacks” that show up in my feed, like the neighbors in WNC who used tulip trees and planks to replace the washed-out bridge over a creek, so folks could at least get in and out on foot or bicycle. The headlines in general are much less click-baity than on social media. This way I only read the stories I’m up for that day.
No anti-social media for me for the last few years, and I don’t miss it even a little bit. Effective moderation or I’m out of there.
I also try to focus on the good things. I did have to take the dog to the emergency vet, but, she didn’t bite anyone, I did have the funds to pay for it, and some fluids and medications and she’s back to her queen of the universe self. Nephew is a first responder in the hurricane zone, but he’s safe, and all his rescues have had good endings. Other nephew had an adorable father/son moment where he taught his 4 yo expectations, consequences, and taking responsibility for your actions. So proud of the daddy he’s turning put to be, and so proud of the great nephew for learning that lesson. So, no bad news for me, and focus on the good stuff.
Thanks for this great post. Cooking and baking for friends and elderly neighbors is a great succoring for my soul in the midst of chaos and fear.
Thank you
You are a wise person.
I go for a walk. If you’re lucky enough to live somewhere that has sidewalks or parks, get yourself out there. I put one foot in front of the other , mull over the latest family crisis, work out my arthritic hip, enjoy a gossip session with my neighbor, and check out the local weather in real time.
The universe tends toward entropy, but, there are ways to slow it down a little.
I subscribe to the Good Girl news channel. it does help
You make really good points about not watching too much news. I limit exposure. I want to know what’s happening, but since they repeat it over and over and often feel the need to tell us what we just watched for ourselves, I am careful about who and what I watch. I also like your idea to do something creative. Today I tried and Italian bread recipe. The loaves LOOK good so I’m hopeful that when they cool enough to cut, they will be tasty. I say that because I tried a honey beer bread recipe and was disappointed.
my while family are news junkies so these times can be difficult. I tell my sis just live by the,serenity prayer. if you can’t change it, stop stressing.
Thanks, I needed that.
I don’t have the attention span to create but put on some music and have a dance party of 1 cheers me up
+1🙂
When I am looking for something to read that feels like visiting with my best friend, I always choose an IA book. Your works ALL have at least one major “feel good” moment, and do leave me feeling better. Thank you for this posting today, and also of course for all of your wonderful books! I have had times where I found myself swirling around the negativity drain, but reading a novel you wrote was the lifeline that kept me from going completely under, and left me in a much more positive frame of mind. 😀
Yes. This. Thank you. 🫠
Even better yet, donate the finished hats to those who need them! Doing something that helps someone else always makes me feel better.
Thank you so much for this reminder! I HAVE been feeling like I’m in a doom and gloom spiral. Everything I read online seems to make me think that the world is ending and I have no hope. I temporarily escape into books (usually my tried and true favorites by HA b/c they are a reliable good time) or look at cute puppy photos on Instagram. But thank you for the reminder to break the endless loop of negativity! And you’ve given us some actual, tangible suggestions, not just meaningless platitudes that are typical of social media these days.
Keep fighting the good fight!
lol, yeah, I read books, do badly written poems, oh try to draw images (really really bad drawings) or sing along with my i pod, laughing at myself cause I couldn’t hit a high note even if you goosed me.
don’t watch TV any more or even get the newspaper, just got tired of the negative news.
Thank you so much to House Andrews for my dose of positivity! Your blog is a shining ray of hope and goodness in this bleak bleak world…. Thank you!
Thanks, I needed that 😁
Thank you for the reminder. My husband tells me to stay off social media and to take breaks from it, because what you click on becomes what they feed you. And I definitely need to stop feeding the negativity wolf, lol.
Read a text by Bjorn Lomborg
Based on “this is my long run forecast in brief: the material conditions of life will continue to get better for most people, and most countries, most of the time, indefinitely. Within a century or two, all nations and most of humanity will be at or above today’s western living standards. I also speculate, however, that many people will continue to think and say that the conditions of life are getting worse. Julian Simon 1932 to 1998 professor of economics university of Maryland.
“Fix the news” (https://fixthenews.com/) is my go to for this. Actual news stories about progress in the world not just feel good fluff. Successful environment projects, progress in human rights, improvement in health outcomes. It really helps to know that sometimes things work.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Great reminder. Thank you.
Shout out to Fix the News, dedicated to bringing forward actual good news stories from right around the world. 2024 has the lowest murder rate for the US in 20+ years, apparently!
I would love to see a news/video channel named “The Good News Channel” where all the good news and socially uplifting news stories of the day are listed and promoted.
Maybe it would reduce the negativity that surrounds us on a daily, and hourly, basis.
“Surely,” you say, “there must be good news out there, somewhere, right?”
There is good news out there, but you must find it. You must convince the AI that you want to see it, but AI is largely programmed to flaunt the mostly eye-catching, and mostly negative, news.
F******k still tries to convince me that funny animal videos aren’t cruel.
I’ve actually started viewing the people giving away lawn and garden care for free to people who cannot afford it, just so the neighborhood gets a small facelift — it’s certainly uplifting for me. I know that the YouT****s are gaining followers and some subscribers (and donations) as well, but just seeing a chaotic disaster of a yard turned into a orderly, green oasis calms me.
I hope your extended family in NC is well and recovers quickly from the hurricane forced flooding.
Take care. Good tidings. Nice hat!
My late mother had suffered from this learned helplessness. She developed fear of burglars, cancer, me driving bigger distances etc. So she lived in panic. Horrible.
I really appreciate that you too the time out to help out this issue in perspective. The amount of negativity around is taking a major toll on many people. I have read and enjoyed all your books and Kate Daniels is my go to series when I want to replenish my energy.
Lots of ❤️
Thank you very much! You popped this one right where it counts! Turn off the stupid bad news! And yes, Create something that makes you happy! I’m 73 and I also have been brought down by STUPID BAD NEWS!!! Then my husband and I chew on it, and bum ourselves out. Thus this reminder of what to do is very welcome. Thank you very much.
Thank you. This is something we all should know and do know, but reading it put so succinctly makes me reassess. Despite losing my (ancient according to my brother) mother recently, learning a cousin has terminal cancer, and having to move quickly, there is so much good, I’m down to one box to unpack, I have a lovely apartment built in the house of friends, my cat loves the new place, and everyone in my family is as healthy as we can expect at our age. Also, after weeks of rain, it’s a beautiful fall day. Thank you. I will keep this message in the front of my mind.
Best advice EVER!!! Thank you House Andrews for keeping us on the right track.
Here it is baking and reading, rereading and rereading Dina and Kate’s stories in a loop that keeps the whirlpool of ick that cannot be controlled outside of my space!
Coincidentally, I started crocheting a hat the night before this was posted, for these very reasons. To add extra “something positive” oomph to it, I’m making it as a donation item – winters are long and cold where I live and people need cozy hats. It’s working for me!
I repair vintage sewing machines as a hobby. I just experienced some overwhelming stress. I stopped what I was doing and spent an hour working on a 70 year old Pfaff. My world is now a better place.
I’ve read and reread all of your books. They are some of my favorite ‘comfort’ books when times are bad or just really stressful. Thank you both for your efforts.
Try to maintain a growth mindset, not a fixed mindset. And definitely do not go into the shrinkage mindset, which can be summed up by. “We are born alone, and we die alone. In-between it gets worse.”
I missed this at the original posting but it found me today… thank you.
I’m headed off to do and complete a task which will bring a sparkle to my day and time to go visit the Baylor family later. 😉
my family LOVES the drama. the Sky Is Falling is their favorite. No. just No. “oh, but don’t you want to panic and dwell on the ugly with us?!” No. I pay my bills, I play in the garden, I kill zombies, I fight with my cat over the knitting/quilting. leave me alone.
Thank you Ilona, I actually needed the reminder 🙂. Will go back to reading a fabulous book right now.
And if the state of your home is feeding your sense of helplessness May I recommend “unfu*k your habitat” – I found it a life changer: https://www.unfuckyourhabitat.com/
Thank you for this little hopeful and useful snippet! I needed reminders of how better to navigate the negative tsunami that is this election cycle (and everything else). I won’t be doing a hat since I never learned beyond baseline straight across knitting but I will paint a picture and try to remember to look towards the light. Thank you and thank you for all the wonderful books you have written that have helped me get away from some of the ugly and stressful parts of my life.
Thank you for this post.
I’ve only taken news in small portions for years as i felt the negative impact it had on me, but i never understood exactly the how and why of it. And even though i sometimes did the things you recommended to get out of the bad place, it was instinctive and not a rational/logical approach so this will make a big difference.
Thanks to the other posters too, Katie R’s post especially.
Everything you say is great! It’s what we tell ourselves to remember to do self care as we do our job….volunteering to help others during their worst times. Smile, move, create, reconnect daily with family and friends. I meet the nicest people, both clients and fellow volunteers. I am doing this virtually along a team of 70 from all over the country, Mexico Hawaii to east coast. We are spending hours each day volunteering and helping folks affected from the Helenes and Milton. It keeps me from watching the news! I will be on this job for several more weeks.
It is cutting into my fantasy reading and painting time, LOL But after three weeks, I am finally making sure to take my breaks and talk with my family. Lucky for me, they support me and surround me with love and care during the worst times when I am going 14 hour/day. So self care includes listening to the Innkeeper series to help laugh during this time. And break out my watercolors for fun. Folding clothes. Thank you for this spot of self care attention! My self care time included reading weeks of your blog posting in my email today.
We all need to remember self care. I too love concrete activities that I can see a beginning and end. So I volunteer. We all give gifts of ourselves to others, an ear, time, energy and love, a knitted cap, a clean counter. Gifts of yourself, there are plenty of ways, large and small, far and near. It is all good.