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ILONA ANDREWS

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Hagy Bird

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I had an interesting birthday. Hilariously, the set of candles that was supposed to spell happy birthday instead spelled out that which you see above, and that is an excellent metaphor for how it went.

Gordon bought me yarn.

Kid 1 bought me soap, cosmetics, a blanket, and a lovely aerogarden among other things.

Kid 2 bought me a mannequin for my knitting and a shotgun. Mossberg. Very nice.

Also, someone sent me this.

It is very pretty. One side is clear, the other side is floral fabric. The inside of the floral fabric is purple with gold polka dots. A quick search online identified this as a floss bag for embroidery.

This shall be a yarn bag instead, and I love it. But it came without a card or any sort of attribution. So thank you so much to whoever sent the bag. Since we don’t know who did it, I will pimp the maker of it instead. It was made by Lake Wind Studio.

Well, I am off to work on edits of Ruby Fever and Sweep of the Heart. I will also be looking through your questions that Mod R is helpfully compiling. Gordon and I hope that your holidays went well and brought you peace and a much needed chance to recharge.

Signing off,

Your Hagy Bird.

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Comments

  2. Hagy Bird. Amazing LOL! I love ALL of your presents and will have to check out that “floss” bag for when I finally have time to take up embroidery and cross-stitch again!

    • Damn supply chain issues. All out of p’s and t’s, and you must have gotten the last ‘h’, ‘a’, and ‘y’. Just imagine what the next person’s birthday candles will spell.

  5. Happy birthday! Mine is on Saturday so I pointed out which underwear and socks I wanted and which chocolate truffles and have left my family to sort it out – except for my mum whom I helped to pick me a birthday card ????

    • Ilona, we hope that your birthday was the first day of a fabulous year!
      Our “Hagy Bird” was the year that my brother (in jr high school, maybe 1972) was writing “Happy Birthday Mom” with CakeMate on the top of Mom’s cake. He made an error, probably “Ho.” In frustration, he wrote Shit, then made it Hot Shit. Then he added Mom. My sister & I cracked up. We all agreed we should use it.

      We have a couple of great pictures of Mom laughing hysterically. We had such a great time laughing about it. It’s a wonderful memory.

      Years from now, you’ll still be laughing about Hagy Bird.

      • For my 42nd birthday my husband made me a cake and wrote Woohoo 42! It was a very humid day in May and by the time I woke up some critical letters had slid off and his message read Ho 42. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed that hard at anything.

  8. Did I read this right? You got a gun for your birthday? I did not know you all were sport gun people. Just curious. No judgement implied.

    • A while ago we did some research and watched a lot of competitive shotgun shooting. I really wanted to try it and said so at the time, so now we have a shotgun for me to practice with once omicron dies down and I can go to the range. 🙂 It is highly unlikely that I will hit any targets, but you never know.

        • Tell me about it! They make it look like they’re on a smooth, even, trajectory and then you squeeze the trigger … and the danged thing zig-zags out of the way! How go they DO that?

      • Didn’t realize there was competitive shotgun. Usually think of rifle for accuracy. If you enjoy target shooting, there are pellet guns that are target equivalents to a .22 rifle for a bit less noise, cost, and risk. They are fun (and there are competitive events with them).

        • Skeet shooting and trap shooting. Both involve hitting fast-moving objects well above the ground.

          • ah yes, forgot about those. My parents grew up on farms, very rural – my grandfather required my father (and his siblings) to use single load rifle for all shooting, including birds, to force them to accuracy (plus who wants to pick buckshot out of dinner). His brother was told to hide his accuracy on target shooting during basic training to avoid being a sniper in Vietnam. I picked up an air rifle in high school for first time and was outshooting boys who had been shooting all their lives in a month – the coach was convinced it was genetic.

            • LOL, my brother used a shotgun for squirrel hunting – once. After cleaning that squirrel, all my brothers used .22s for squirrel, and all head shots. My sister and I both knew how to shoot, and more importantly how not to shoot, but hunting wasn’t our thing. In my case, it may have been because of how shocked everybody was at my first two shots at clay pigeons. After that I started second-guessing myself, which made it a lot harder to hit things.

      • I hope you have, well, a blast! My husband and son love their time at the trap range. Happy belated birthday!

      • I shoot my targets pretty accurately with a rifle, less so with a hand gun and shot gun we all just ???? laugh ????. Here is hoping you have better aim!

        For my December Birthday I got a Nintendo Ring Fit System that I love (it is excercise in a video game format). It has an arm work out as one of the mini games and like my attempt to shoot a shot gun, I can’t lead the target and hit it for love or money. My spouse laughed for 5 minutes solid while I flailed away.

        Happy New Year to all!

      • I don’t mind shooting a .22 or my bolt action Mauser, but after shooting a shotgun once, I won’t do it again. The recoil is not trivial. Of course the shotgun I shot was a country bumpkin hillbilly special (aka old family gun) I wonder if competitive shotguns have less. I’d be interested in hearing how it goes!!

        • Yes, modern shotguns have much less recoil. Especially inertia-driven semi automatic shotguns that absorb part of the recoil energy to cycle the next shell. Rubber cushions on the butt of the stock help a lot too, as does shooting smaller shells with less mass of pellets.

      • I know a lady how did it as an Olympic sport. She said the practice helped her zen out from the kids.

        • I can believe that! I used to shoot competitively using a Smith&Wesson Model 41 (.22). It was very “zen” or mindful and everything drifted away when shooting. Helped me have a clearer head and make better decisions because the stress and tension were reduced. Loved shooting.

      • Moyesway Shooting Sports is close to San Marcos – they just do Sporting Clays, but it’s all open air and they have golf carts so you don’t have to walk. It was a fun day out.
        https://www.moyesway.com/

        The San Antonio Gun Club has a lovely Skeet/Trap setup, also outdoors and seem to be more Covid conscious than many.
        https://www.sagunclub.com/

        My kid just started shotgun club this fall, so I’m learning all the things. 🙂 I was surprised how many targets he was breaking from the beginning, so don’t underestimate yourself!
        And Happy Birdday!

  9. Happy Belated Birthday and Happy New Year to you and the family!

    Your presents look awesome. Ive been dancing around those plant pods for a about a month now. If it works well would you mind letting us know.
    I want to plant veges and herbs but I dont like outside much. And Ive killed a few window sill plants. These look like a solution for someone like me.

    • I have 1. You don’t have to use the kit pods, but refills of the sponges (what holds the seeds) is a must. I found some on Amazon.
      I have had mine for a year. It came with herbs. I would not recommend planting mint in it ever again. It says to clean out the basin once a month. I forgot and there were roots through the filter and into the pump, and it had lots of algae. The basil and dill produces a ton. The thyme didn’t do much.
      The second planting was lettuce last spring. That went well until aphids covered everything. I just planted the 3rd time. I didn’t need it during the summer when I have a garden outside. I planted some herbs and some lettuce. We will see how that goes.

  12. Excuse me, you forgot the picture of the shotgun. I have questions. Is it tactical, autoloader, pump, or over and under?

    I just bought myself a CZ-USA American Sporting. I like to shoot sporting clays.

  15. Hagy Birrd to Ilona! I love the mannequin/Mossberg combo. Almost bought my daughter a mannequin a few times, but she’s mostly given up the sewing in her present stage of life. If she ever gets back to it, maybe I’ll get around to the mannequin. I’m energized with the new year; wishing you the same energy but with less stress in the generation of it.

  19. Hippo birdie, two ewes!*
    And many happy returns of the day!

    Your birthday swag is impressive. It’s hard to know what to get folks with a birthday so close to the holiday season, but your family has done a great job.
    I hope you have a lot of fun with it.

    * (With apologies to Sandra Boynton for borrowing her material.)

    • And “hippo gnu deer, 2 ewes”

      … thanks for the happy memories of Sandra Boynton’s drawings.

      • She has a great website.
        My daughter sends me “clips” every now and again – also mugs…

      • +1 I got someone that birthday card when it originally came out. Love her work. Can’t remember who, but I sure remember the card. Also, “Gopher Baroque” with the wigs.

        • Found Boynton Christmas cards one year – a bovine choir singing the “Halle-moo-jah” Chorus.
          Best. holiday. card. ever!!

  22. I’m glad you had a nice birthday. It’s nice when family members pay attention enough to know what you want. ????

  23. Happy Birthday, love the new ‘yarn bag’, I am a knitter also so love getting knitting things for my birthday and xmas and anytime really.

  25. I’m glad your birthday was a good one. Oh well with the candles. It could have been worse than Hagy Bird. It could have been Hag Bird or something like that.
    Nice presents. 😀

    Have fun with the edits!

  27. Happy birthday, Ilona! We share a birthday. For my birthday, we tried your apple cake – I did a terrible job making it, but it was good fun and the edible parts tasted great! (I’ve never made a meringue before!) My partner and I are looking forward to trying again.

    Hagy Birrd, lol. Much love to all of House Andrews, and a happy new year to the BDH!

  28. Happy Birthday Hagy Birdd. And to you and Gordon Yhank you so much for the Friday Gifts of ‘Sweep of the Blade’. Hope that Hagy Birdd is the worst thing that happens in 2022. Thank you!!!

    • Omg, the renaming continues ????. I did it first lol, but Sweep of the Heart! The new serial is Sweep of the Heart, before people get confused!

      • I liked your rename in the last post Mod R. Much better than Sweeping Hearts (which still sounds like a soap opera). If people start saying Sweep of the Blade instead of Sweep of the Heart, you’re going to find yourself saying “It’s about Dina and Sean, not Arland and Maude”. 🙂

        • The title is still in the works, it will be changed when the final version is figured out ????

  29. Love it! For my grandmother’s birthday a few years ago we purchased a “Happy Birthday” banner, which ended up saying “Harpy Birthday” instead. Everyone got a kick out of it.

  33. Happy Birthday! May you stay as young and fit and healthy and amazing as you’ve been until now! Have a great one!

  36. Interested to know how you get on with the aerogarden, and how you decide to use it (e.g. using it to start plants off to grow elsewhere vs as a source of herbs etc). My husband got me one. I tried to grow garden mint in it, as I love fresh mint tea, but found the mint had no flavour.

    My husband used it to grow tomato plants in our office, which did produce fruit, but then died when we went away for a week so we had a dead mini tomato forest on our office for a while…

  39. Happy Birthday, Ilona. Thank you for the post, Ilona Andrews.

    Nice “loot”. Congratulations.

    Don’t know if I should be jealous over Mossberg or not. My local wildlife club speaker this month is a gunsmith who mainly works with sniper rifles and hunting rifles and I am looking for to. Might end up Zoom due to pandemic. Shrug

    Ha ha for you. I have been chauffeuring my 38 week as of today pregnant neighbor to her weekly ob gyn / ultrasound appointments. Well she doesn’t drive, husband is out of town on work project and I have extended passenger seat belts so she properly fits. Anyway I declined attending family Christmas gathering. I am in dog house. Plus, I am now only one beside my 78 year old demented mother who I insisted get vaccinated for flu and Covid boostered before thanksgiving who hasn’t gotten sick and tested positive for Covid. Yes 2 year old has tested Covid positive and they all played with him at party. ????????. Oh yes so now I am on chauffeuring duty for Mother who has multiple annual appointments in January because everyone else is quarantined. Sigh. Sigh. No good deed goes unpunished. ????

  40. Congrats on another trip around the sun. I LOVE shotgun sports. It’s addictive. Unfortunately that shotgun kicks like Marigold on a bender. It’s more for home defense. The sound of you chambering a shell is usually enough to scare a bad guy off. Light=higher recoil. Save your cheek some abuse and get low recoil ammo. If you’re ever in Houston, I’m an instructor. Happy to take you out. Also, enjoy the Aerogarden. That’s another fun addiction.

  41. You got a shotgun? I’m amused and fascinated. Nothing like getting a feel for what you write about. Do you have a sword, too? You should upload a pic of you with your weapons. Gordon too. This would be amusing.

    Happy Birthday. Or, Hippo Birdy Two Ewes! (per Boynton; cannot remember her first name)

  43. I feel that the Hagy Birrd should live in the forest by Hugh and Elena, or be a yard pet for Roman.

    What? *whistles innocently*

    Belated birthday wishes and thanks for all you do! Is there a knitting project for skeet shooting?

  44. I have a similar mannequin (bought on sale) — it is not one that is sized for me, so I just use it mostly for draping and occasional display. If I need to size it up to approximately “me size”, I find that a quilt batting, a t-shirt, and a corset works pretty well. 🙂

    Good luck with your knitting. I hope you enjoy and I hope we get to see your pretty yarn and what you do with it. Though we all enjoyed seeing “Gordon” model the ranger hood that you made; it will just not be the same on the mannequin.

  45. Hagy Birrd Ilona!!! My husband splurged on a Benelli shotgun. He’s taken it to the range twice. I keep asking if it’s even possible to miss. Doesn’t it just shoot everything?!?! ????

  46. Hagy Bird. Suits you, I think. Looks like your birthday presents were as good as my Christmas presents were.

    I hope the editing goes well.

  51. Happy Birthday. <3 Making use of old cake candles is always fun.
    Wishing you blessing and lots of fun stuff.

    Wait: shotgun?

  56. Shotgun shells are hard to find now. We have a friend who does a lot of skeet and trap. You might see if you can find ammo now so when omicron dies down you are ready!

    Happy Birthday and thank you for our presents of the chapters! I read mine on Christmas and New Years day. I loved them!

  59. Wait. Were those candles bought as a pack advertised as spelling out,“Happy Birthday”, but in actual fact contained candles spelling, “Hagy Birrd”? Or were they leftovers from something else?

  60. Happy Birthday! January b’days sometimes get shorted for gifts but I’d say you are loved. My Mom’s 100th birthday was January 2, nice to see a celebration. If you are looking for an interesting name , my Mom was Edeltrude Mary-(Trudy)

  62. Happy birthday ???? living in the UK I have to wait until I visit my brother in Florida before I can go shooting at his local range, then I get to spend a few hours shooting and decimating poor innocent paper targets. ????????????

  63. This looks like something my mom would do in an attempt to use up candles leftover from previous birthdays. Sometimes we get things like instead of a 3 and a 5 or 35 candles or 3 candles and 5 candles (all of which are reasonably sensible), it’s a 3 and 5 candles or a 2 and a 1 and a 5 or a 1 and 2 candles and a 4 and 1 candle. Depending on which number candles she can find.

  65. There is biathlon in the winter Olympics. Combining skiing and shooting. Try out for the team for 2026 winter games??
    Happy Birthday and many more!! ????????????

  69. Happy Birthday!!! I’d suggest not setting up the Aerogarden over a reflective surface, because holy bright light Batman! Save the retinas! (Husband got one for Christmas and I had to have him put it in his office because its so dang bright)

  70. Happy belated birthday! As far as interesting names my dipping into Ancestry has yielded the names Zerelda, Artilda, Onia and my favorite which is Nellie Viola.

  73. Where is the picture of the yarn? Did Gordon not do a good job? I do not know if he is yarn-trained so I can only speculate.

  74. Hagy Birrd! Or, in other words, Happy Birthday! I hope your day was lovely! It sounds like your family chose thoughtful gifts that you will enjoy! Hope you all have a great year!

  76. Happy Belated Birthday!!

    Those are some awesome Birthday presents!! Hope you enjoy your shotgun when you get to go!

    I loved shooting them when I was a kid.My husband was sweet and bought my a benille shotgun for Christmas 8 years ago I have not been able to go and shoot it even once. So don’t wait that long!

  77. Happy Birthday! I love that you all just rolled with the lack of candles and made it fun.

    I’m already thinking about what other words could be made out of those candles, one of my favorite things to do in school.

    Drooling over the AeroGarden and that mannequin is quite stylish.

  78. Happy Belated Birthday. It sounds like a wonderful day. Chocolate cake, gifts from loved ones. All nice gifts

  79. Got a Mossberg bolt action as a gift once, with with a 16 gauge 4 shell removable magazine and a variable L-Lect-Choke. I love it and have tons of fond memories of the gentleman who gifted it to me. You are a lucky lady. Plus you got yarn! Nice. As a lady loving to crochet you got the best for your day. Have a great rest of the day !!!

  80. When was your birthday? Mine is New Year’s Eve. when I was little, I thought everyone celebrated my birthday. It was quite the blow to find out they were celebrating a holiday instead. lol. Sending you late birthday wishes and good vibes for the New Year for everyone at House Andrews!

  87. My Hubby said “A Mossburg?? That’s a nice gun! Where’d she get it?”

    Me: “It was a gift of love. plus there are varmints.”

    Hubby: “Yeah. Rock salt over their heads works.”

    Love the Aeorgarden. I tried one of those once, and our cats destroyed it.

    Happy Birthday!

  88. 1) So Turan Adin’s identity is the worst kept secret with curious werewolves coming to visit their “Prince” and the Hope-Crushing Horde sending externs, and then Dina and Sean in effect livecasted a premier MMA (Drifen) fight: are we going to see Ad-hal tourists too?

    2) When do we get to meet Klaus?!?

    3) Sebastian North?!?!?

    4) Was there anyone amongst Maud’s former in-laws who was her ally, either secretly or overtly?

    Thank you for all the mind-blowing world creation!!!

  93. Nice haul for your Birthday. Hearing protection, because shotguns are quite noisy. And then have fun.
    I’m in isolation which is not fun BTW. Heading to bed again, now.

  94. Happy birthday! Congratulations on finishing another “Big Hard Yr” …I love anagrams … Mod R’s hybrid rag was super!

  97. Got a picture in my head of my favorite authors training shotgun, John Wick-esque style. I can’t tell enough how bad-ass that looked! ????????. Hagy Birrd-day!

  98. Happy Birthday ???????????????? mines in February ???????? and most miss it as it’s the start year here.

  100. Ye shalt henceforth be called the Hagy Bird branch of House Andrews (and the other branch is…Googy Bear?)

    😀

  101. Happy belated Birthday, and may the year continue with chocolate cake, lovely presents and fun things like Hagy Birds.

  107. Happy Birthday! My dad gave us his Army competition rifle as a wedding gift, along with the spotting scope, just before we went off to our first Army duty station as a family. A couple years later, when we were stationed at Ft. Benning, GA, and could use the nearby ranges to go shoot in our free time, there were opportunities to try out other weapons our friends brought for practice. I’d never shot a pistol until then, but when I outshot both of the experienced Army guys on my first tries with it, my husband decided to surprise me with one the following Christmas. My in-laws were visiting that year, and my MIL still talks about the gifts, because my darling husband not only gave me a pistol, but a serger! She saw it as a dichotomy. My husband never has.

  108. Happy birthday!

    I saw Ruby Fever up for preorder on Audible already? If not a mistake, yay!! If so, here’s the heads up!

    • Cornelius hasn’t added any animals. A Hagy Bird would be a nice addition to go along with his blue maned kitty cat.

  111. Happy Birthday! I’m a yarn enthusiast also but really, where’s the photo of the Mossberg? I have one and love it!!

  112. Aerogardens are great we are still growing cherry tomatoes from last spring. Hubby loves them. Hagy Bird! lol

  114. Happy Birthday! I hope you enjoy your lovely presents. I love my aerogarden for herbs and lettuce. Only problem is I have to keep buying fish for dinner, b/c the dill grows so well our tartar sauce vehicle supply can’t keep up with it!

  119. Happy Birthday to the primo Hagybirrd. Excellent gifts and a beautiful yummy cake. Marvelous ????

  120. The cake looks like it was delicious! Glad you had a happy day (no matter how it was spelled!) Here’s wishing you many more! ????

  121. Oooooh, may I make a formal request for future updates on the progress/performance of the AeroGarden? I’ve wanted one for years but keep talking myself out of it! Every year I try to grow my own herbs outside but the beetles get the basil and the #@&% deer eat everything else (well, I have mint, sage, and lavender that do well, but I want parsley! thyme! oregano! cilantro! tarragon!).

  122. Happy Birthday, you received quite the eclectic assortment of gifts.
    There is a way (or two) of making the torso your size. Gordon or the girls get to wrap you up in a lot of duct tape (over a t-shirt), slice it up the back, install it on the torso, stuff it, and tape the back shut. I’ve always thought that might be fun if combined with a bottle or two of wine. Duct tape comes in fun colors and patterns now for more fun options. ????

  124. Here’s another fan wishing you a hagy birrd-day! Also, I misread the present Gordon gave you and thought for about three seconds that he had given you a yam. I’m losing it.

  126. Happy Birthday! Is your birthday on the 4th? If so, we are birgday buddies! Cheers!

  129. Loving this. It’s how we manage to roll with those we love (especially on those special days that go just a bit sideways)–that’s what defines so much of life. <3

    Hagy Birrd to you! Wishing you happy writing, knitting, and occasional target practice in the year to come. 🙂

  131. Once found an adjustable mannequin at a thrift store but they were using it to display clothing and wouldn’t sell it. I still sigh over it.
    My shotgun is a lady Remington. Short stock and barrel. Very comfortable.

  132. *waves hand in air down inOz* I understand you live in Texas and that’s a big pro gun area, but why do you need a shotgun?

    Just curious no judgement

    • Birthday presents are not generally based on “need” ???? .

      Ilona answered above https://ilona-andrews.com/2022/hagy-bird/#comment-553914 :
      “A while ago we did some research and watched a lot of competitive shotgun shooting. I really wanted to try it and said so at the time, so now we have a shotgun for me to practice with once omicron dies down and I can go to the range.”

  133. I was given an aerogarden for Christmas. It came with pizza herbs, my sister was so excited to find those for me. I hope you like it!

  134. So, this happened in my coven this morning. Completely spontaneously. Posted here (of course with everyone’s consent) as a belated birthday present to Ilona and purely with the intention of -hopefully- putting a smile on someone’s face.

    (It’s 4 screenshots of a messenger window)

  135. (Do you read new comments on old blogs?) Your blob reminded me of a car window-sticker that also reminded me of you — just in case you haven’t already seen it/have it for years.

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