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Plastic Palms

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In 1983 someone in Raleigh, NC must have said, “I want an indoor lap pool. And I want plastic palms around it. Design a home around that.”

There is a TV in a little house with the fireplace jutting out of it. There is a bed suspended on bungee cords. There is the front of the house. There is… no, too much. Go see for yourself.

Link to Redfin listing: go here first.

Link to the slideshow is you want more detail: Ultra Private ITB House

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Comments

  1. I am a real estate agent and have seen some strange things but this… this my take all the cakes. The bed is hurting my brain.

    • I am so confused by it. Like how do you sleep on it? Wouldn’t it just bounce all over the place? Why… why?

      • I may be wrong b/c it’s hard to tell from the pix but…isn’t it a bungee bed with a slanted, mirrored ceiling? For maximum nausea effects.

        • The floor is highly polished and the bed has legs. Could it be an optical illusion that the bed is floating? In that case the chains would just be (bad) decoration like bed posts.

          Has anyone noticed the “flames” in the mirror above the bed. I think they are a reflection of the orange glowing glass blocks in the floor (edging two sides of the room).

          • I thought of that, but wondered if maybe the legs are there so that it has something to land on if the ropes break?

      • PLUS bonus mirrored ceiling!!! Woot!

        The sad part is that in some ways I can almost see the attraction of hte house, then I remember the plastic palms and mirrored bungee bed…..

      • I think it would be like sleeping on a hammock or waterbed. I loved my 1980s waterbed ????. Not something I would want now at age 50.

        The house has some good points but very specific things to the owner. Tough sell I think for the price.

      • I mean, I’m pretty sure those are actually chains with satin covers. You can see the links hanging down in the 9th photo on Redfin. So it wouldn’t *bounce,* but I’m not sure that makes it any better.

      • It’s probably on (cloth covered) chains rather than bungee cords. Not nearly as exciting, unfortunately.

      • Also, if you look at the second link with the detailed slidesow- the bed on chains (swing bed) not bunge cords as you can see the chain links and its covered by cloth, is next to a dining room setting/area and you can see the pool through glass. Also the ceiling is all mirrors – fun!

        To many weird angles and mirrors – from above it looks like two houses were joined together – the roof are two different colors and it looks like they enclosed open spaces between the two homes. The decor reminds me of 70 and 80 vibes – chrome, mirrors, abstract art.

      • It’s off the main living area too. So I’m going with it’s either meant to be for napping and reading, or for freaky sex parties. Take your pick.

        • haha… I’d vote the freaky sex parties. With all the mirrors everywhere it’s just so bizarre. Like, if Saiman had a private home in the country …and the other weird thing is how the neighboring houses are so *normal. brick colonial style to the right, regular white house to the left… if you walked that loop you’d be like…something is different, there, in the middle, haha.

          • What I want to know is why they didn’t remove it for the showing. It seems like more people would be turned off by the weird chain bed than would want it.

      • did you notice the glass wall between the master bedroom and the dining room which is way too much sharing for my taste

      • Those are actually chains within satin sleeves. They won’t bounce, but they’ll certainly rock from side to side. Definitely a sleep-quietly-by-yourself bed, which makes the mirrored ceiling extremely ironic. Any vigorous motion would risk a quick drop to the floor.

      • I have actually slept in similar one once during vacation in mountains. Much smaller and suspended from chains but same result…. No sleep due to weird movement and constant fear of falling????

    • My first thought about the bed was someone taking a running leap to get into it and then the momentum swings them right through the window.

    • Umm… why is the bungee bedroom open to the dining room?? …like ZERO door/wall/curtain/plastic palms or anything. Just open to the dining and living room… for all to enjoy.

        • Okaaaay, so they repurposed the sunroom as a bungee bedroom. If I was a guest for dinner, I would find that very… distracting. (You can see several pics of the sunroom/bungee bedroom in the slideshow link.)

    • From what I know, that is a lounge area. Lay down in bed, reading, open the windows for fresh air to blow through. Kinda like a hammock, but more comfortable.

      • Thanks for the picture, I think the BDH broke the website. I was having difficulty viewing pictures or slides… I haven’t seen internet speed so slow since dail up.

  2. One room looked like a distillery at first glance…took me a minute to identify what it was all about!

  3. I’m like glass block and even put a glass block window in each of my bathrooms when I remodeled, but that is way too much glass block in one place.

  5. Me: okay, that’s kind of cool. Different, but lots of light.
    (Five pictures later) WHAT IS HAPPENING?! WHAT IS THAT?! (A few more slides) actually, I like that a lot. I’d love to live there. WAIT OH NO NO NO I FEEL…. WHY?!!!!

  6. I couldn’t help myself… I had to look and… ???? What the heck were these people thinking when they built this place???

    On the positive side, it has a putting green… ????

      • I think the putting green and the plastic palm trees are the same person, who clearly wanted to live near a golf course in Florida.

        I’m not sure what the other person wanted…

  7. When I imagine my I-won-the-lottery house, I keep trying to figure out a lap pool. Just can’t put it in there. Maybe I’ll just buy a membership to the university gym, which has 2 olympics size pools.

  8. Plastic Palms aside, I love this house. I could never afford this house, and it would need to come with a regular cleaning person. But I think it is fun. So many great rooms. The Bungees are a little odd.

    • I like some aspects of it. Too many/big windows in the bedrooms, but I really like the round windows and the trees all around.

      There are too many weird angles, though. A few makes it interesting. Every single room makes it look like you’re trying too hard to be unique.

  11. It’s just such a weird mish mash of so many different styles. Why…who…no…better not to ask.

  12. I think the bed is on chains with a fabric covering the chains. I like the bungee cord idea better though.

    This house also wins the award for the most use of glass blocks. Ugh

  13. Oh thank you. This is fabulous. I applauded the bed. Live your truth. I hope they are moving for a bigger pool.

    • Showing my husband….it would only be better if the ceiling was mirrored…..it is mirrored! Yes!!!!

  15. I have no design sense. Can someone with taste please explain that house to me? Like….what’s up with the railings? Is that some kind of putting green? I counted at least 3 different kinds of tile before I stopped the slideshow. There was a bathroom sink with the faucet in the near left corner….

  19. Imagine if, in the Kate universe…soemthing like that was so strange it developed a magic and mythology all of it’s own.

    Thousands of years from now, the cultists migrate on annual pilgrimages, to worship at the indestructible plastic palm tress, and make sacrifices to their god of all gods…

    Pink Flamingo.

    • I’ve been wondering about the fireplaces too. I think 1 is gas and 1 is wood? 1 for when you want real and 1 for when you feel like easy?

    • If you’re talking about the one in the tile floored room, I think that’s actually just a mirrored wall. I was wondering myself until I figured that out.

  22. Roof soup plus portholes, check. Some random columns – why not? Way, way too many textures. Ok. But, explain the bathrooms AND the weird room with a pot bellied stove? A distillery? Sauna?

  23. Well, it’s certainly… ummmm… Unique? LOL And… Is it just me or are the rooms really odd shapes?

  24. Wow – That’s – um – excessive.
    It appears to be a 2 Bedroom home. (I didn’t bother to look for square footage.)
    No walls anywhere inside? – or just a lazy artist who couldn’t be bothered w/ interior dimensions?
    Astroturf in the courtyard, as well as the plastic palms, because these things are hard to grow in Florida?
    I like quirky architecture, but this is just strange…

  25. Wow… That’s a whole lotta house! You’d definitely need to hire someone to help clean!???? All that glass! I love all the greenery surrounding the house the kitchen is quite nice a TON of natural light.

    • I was thinking the same thing, way too much glass. Who has time to clean all that glass. Those whirlpool bathtubs are a pain to clean too.

  26. When my parents bought their current house, the loft bedroom featured a king size bed that hung from thick chains in the ceiling. Any movement sent the bed swinging.

  27. No, just….no. Why? Oh pretty window…wait, what? Why?
    Just no.
    And am I reading that right…only $41K?!?
    O_O

    …..

    Still NO! *shudders*

    • Oh….#facepalm….it’s been reduced by $41k

      Ummm, well…the better lower it a whole lot more.

      Just saying….

  29. That kitchen is just so oddly shaped. Why a triangle? Also I’ve slept on beds hanging in the air on a beach in Tulum. That makes sense (no sand!). In a house, that just seems really really odd.

  30. There’s a dining room next to the bed on chains!! With interior windows between them with no shades!!! What? Really, what???

  31. I think they wanted to live in the woods, the bed is sorta hammocky. So much glass. So many windows. So many weird angles.

  32. Weirdly I kinda like this house I would never live in it because it would drive me insane but it would be a fun house to rent for a vacation!

      • I’m not sure where you saw that, but that makes me feel sorry for the listing agent. It’s been on for 48 days and only 63 people favorited it? I’m guessing that at least some of those came from here or aren’t serious buyers. That’s a tough sell.

        • I mean…with all those mirrors and angles…they could market this a little differently. Like, perfect house to conjure beings from other dimensions.

  33. Looked at all the photos…and my overall reaction is “couldn’t they have swept the decks of leaves before taking the pictures?” ????

  34. I luuuuuuve it! (except for the plastic palm trees) I especially love that it looks like a weird but normal sized McMansion from the front and just balloons from there!

  35. This is…so. confusing. Like, I see bits and think okay, a bit odd, but cool. And then…and then… Well. Each to their own I suppose?! Seems a tough sell as it is. But oh the things it Could be!

  36. Well, it does have a putting green. Otherwise? I can’t imagine what getting out of that bed in the dark of the night would be like.

  37. I like the three-photo picture on the wall of the swimming pool room in the TV/Fireplace room – just in case you forgot what it looked like!!

    • I like the picture over the pool of someone swimming, in case you weren’t sure what to do in there.

    • YES! Came here to say that. They loved the lap pool SO MUCH that they needed a triptych to remind themselves in ANOTHER ROOM OF THE HOUSE.

      It’s incredible.

    • NC. That house is partially underground which would not float in Florida, pretty much. 🙂 Too much sand and limestone here.

  39. wow, that glass block entryway is MAGNIFICENT. and all of those giant round windows… the kitchen was surprisingly normal though. and I applaud them for loving their lap pool plastic palm tree arcade enough to have it immortalized and hung on the wall of the living room. but still, ALL OF THAT FUNKY GLASS BLOCK, so nice.

  41. Like the idea of an open 1st floor lost it, when I realized the bungee bed, is see able by all but, the kitchen (not sure on that). At least there was walls, on the other floors. I think there was walls, might be questioning that now. Liked the lap pool even the plastic palms, large place with too many windows, but that’s my opinion

  43. I ain’t gonna lie, I’m strangely attracted to this. ????

    And it begs the question – how did you happen to stumble across it?

    • I have a search set up on Redfin because I like to look at Texas mansions. I was pulling the map around with my mouse and landed around Raleigh, and this was the only house in the area Redfin covered. So I clicked it. 😀

      • Now I see, the Maryland questions were a red herring. You were planning on moving here all along. The bungee bed is sleeping quarters for all the dogs and the palm trees are so you don’t have to let them out to be attacked by by fat black and white squirrels. Well done…. very well done

  45. They loved that pool so much, they put a photograph of it in the living room.
    Also I loved the Greek temple take on the TV 🙂

    • I saw that and thought it a particularly nice touch. I mean if you’ve got a really narrow pool with tall plastic trees then you do need to have a large picture of it prominently displayed too. . .

  49. Um, am I hard-of-seeing or is there really no bathroom on the main floor? So, after my lovely swim, I get to traipse through the house, go upstairs, go through the bedroom and then shower. As do all my my guests. Um, no.
    And my chronic vertigo just looked at the bed and did a 360 in my head.
    I’m off to take my meclizine.????

  54. I was just thinking how excited the agent will be given how many hits the bdh will make on the pictures. The house must have an impressive electric bill for keeping cool in a North Carolina summer. Also, why didn’t they screen in the golf area outside the pool? Too many bugs to leave the doors open. I think the space above the fridge is a shelf to store stuff while still providing air flow for the fridge.

  55. I’m seeing someone who probably said to their architect “I want Florida art deco (the pool), I want Montana country house” (the stone fireplace room), I want Japanese zen (the white room with one chair) etc. Said architect probably originally presented a unified vision of something and had a client who didn’t quite get that having a unified theme works better.

    • I kind of love the Steampunk room though. And if they could have afforded/had thought of the metallic art deco palm tree sculptures instead of plastic ones, that room would have been kind of fab.

  56. How cold does it get in the winter there? There’s at least 2 fireplaces as well as a wood stove in the sun room. Tropics meets the Adirondacks. At least there aren’t plastic monkeys for the trees.

  57. Love the setting up in the trees, decks, and big full glass windows, even in the bedrooms! Even with all of the wood elements, that is one of the most sterile looking ‘homes’ I’ve ever seen. What a shame – it could be really cool! They’d have to drop it at least another $41k so you could afford the fix!

  61. This house …. It’s like a crazed architect threw up!

    I do love the views through the large windows, and I’ve always wanted a hanging bed, but the rest? There aren’t enough words to describe it.

  62. This was (or is) someone’s dream home

    Needs a remodel. This design style did not age well.
    I could see something Salvador Dali inspired. That’d be cool.

    I do love the porch and all those trees.

  63. I think my favorite part of that house is the big thing hanging over the pool that depicts some poor girl with a very tiny head and enormous hips and thighs. It doesn’t look like much of a positive endorsement for swimming. “Dive in! You might smash your brains a bit but you’ll have very big legs.”

  64. Well, I guess the house itself isn’t all that bad. You’d just have to.get rid of all the mirrors and all the ugly and/or crazy stuff inside… once you’ve put some nice and good furniture into it and added some decorative stuff that’s not so strange… it could be a beautiful home.

  66. ????????????????thanks for this. I’ve just spent an hour I won’t get back pointlessly flicking through some weird houses up for sale on the site. Do these people not realise that when photos are being taken that they are then being put ‘out there’? A baby’s feeding bottle on the bathroom counter, clutter everywhere, shower curtains that make my eyes bleed ( seriously). Empty rooms which makes me wonder – is there anybody living here or have they just got no furniture for this room? A garden that looks like a desert with a fire pit & 2 chairs!! Don’t get me wrong I’m sure we have house like this here in the UK. I think I’m going to start devoting some time to having a look ????????

    • My hubby and I are house hunting. You’d be surprised at how messy some places are. If it were me I would tidy up, move the clutter to storage or at least another room, take pics and repeat.

      Hubby and I are looking to move to Italy and some of the pics are head scratching. Cut the lawn, spray paint the rusty outdoor furniture and add a couple cushions to them. Cheap to do. places with beautiful views that barely show it….

  67. The bed is made for rope-play/suspension and other forms of BDSM play. The mirror heightens the effects. Nice. The rest of the house is on crack.

  69. Since the bed is next to a dining table I’m thinking it isn’t for sleeping but is sort of like a lounge bed to hang out with your besties. The rest of it seems to be a bunch of little rooms with no discernible purpose unless it’s, “this is the manic room and this is the depressive room and this is the mountain getaway theme room and this is the 1980’s John Holmes porn room”.

    All these photos are on a bright sunny day. I think this house would be really creepy at night.

    • I agree. TOo many mirrors …and the windows and glass…I’d be jumping out of my skin every five seconds. lol. Cats might enjoy it though.

  70. ????Wow! So there are spots…from certain angels…that are very beautiful. I love the windows to the lush green outside. However, no way on the planet! I would not be surprised to hear that a man designed it and only a man lived there. It’s like “Oh I want to live in the forest…swing from the trees…swim in the river…but what about guests. Still it’s not nearly as bad as the mannequin house. That was disturbing!!

  72. Where do you start. Swinging bed, weird angles, metallic and black bathroom. The only colors are black, white and grey. It’s looks like a weird set from a bad science fiction movie.
    But I did like the suggestion of metallic Palm trees.
    I would live in the kitchen. At least that looks normal.

  73. If you click on street view and rotate around there is a u-haul and a second moving truck parked down the street. Unhappy neighborhood?????????

    Year built 1981. Very Beetlejuice meets Miami Vice.

  74. Where do you find this stuff LOL? Honest to God some people have more money than brains LOL. Who would do this to their house and why?!????‍♀️

  75. I like the concept of all the windows….but no blinds or curtains or shutters….NO privacy. AND who wants to wash all those? Saw the stainless steel toilet seat/lid…all I could of was.. it’s a bitch to keep the fingerprints off the stainless refrigerator and stove…how the hell would you keep butt prints off THAT!!

  76. It weirdly reminds me of a cruise ship… definitely a Miami Vice vibe. The outdoor space with the deck floating amidst the trees is lovely though, but I totally pan the weird astroturf patio.

    But, but, but — does this mean you’re considering NC!?

  78. OK, it’s too much but there is a ton to really like about the house. And as a person who built a indoor heated lap pool in a sun room off our kitchen {no plastic palms} let me tell you, that pool rocks like everything. We swim year round. However, I can not imagine the humidity in there. Our sun porch windows stay foggy all winter, even with the pool cover.

    Now I’m wondering if we get to count that room in with our square footage? It’s not heated, it doesn’t need to be with the pool water and glass.

  79. Some one put a lot of thought and love into this house.

    The back over looking the woods is fabulous.

    I didn’t like all the levels. The slideshow made it confusing as to how to get around the house. But that is my major pet peeve of all the real estate websites. Many owners and agents provide pictures that should take you on a tour of the home and you can get 40 pictures of the kitchen. I want to be guided through the house and understand where I am.

    Over all the house has some nice features but it looks as if over time bits where added that were a different design style and it clashes now.

    Getting rid of all of the track lighting and the glass block would be nice.

    Find a style and stick to it.

  80. Liked the kitchen. The basement seems really… sterile?
    It’s a treehouse with a pool?
    (Good luck to the real estate agency; this listing will be on the market for awhile….)

  81. In 1989 Jayne Ann Krentz wrote a futuristic romance called Shield’s Lady, which featured a hanging bed. I believe the reason behind that was so you could sleep safely at night and the scorpion type critters could not sting you while you slept.

    I really enjoyed those futuristic romances, some were a real hoot.

  83. Wow. In so many ways this house had a lot of potential (big windows, lots of space, big trees outside, etc.), but someone turned it into a hodgepodge of classless furniture, beds, decorations, fireplaces and everything else. I cringed just looking at the slideshow. The previous owners should be fined for being classless decorating morons. There has to be a law against it somewhere, doesn’t there??

  86. It’s got a very individual and quirky layout.
    Some of the room shapes remind me of old English homes where they’ve been repurposed from large houses to smaller apartments and you get some odd nooks and crannies, or even some of the older purpose built London houses that have been wedged into existing street spaces over the years.

    Knowing nothing of the area I wonder if it could be down to geological necessity (is it on a rocky hill or near underground caverns or rivers or some such?) and space saving design.

    On another note one must admire the fully mirrored water closet as all people of good breeding know how important it is to maintain a cool and calm comportment whilst using the commode 😉

  87. It’s crazily ugly! Although the outside looks really enticing.
    I don’t understand the hammoc bed, to be honest…

  89. When we were looking at houses the weirdest think I had seen had been the toilet outside of the master bathroom in the middle of the bedroom…. like then screwed up the wall and said ok we can just have the toilet next to our bed???? But this is pretty weird too!!

  90. I think the trees came in this way:

    “I want an inside pool to do laps in all year”

    “Okay. A bit pricier than an outside pool, but we can do that”

    “And I want to feel like I’m doing my laps in a jungle in paradise”

    (Interior decorator prices full grown palms and Chinese back with a number)

    “Okay… Can we do fake ones?”

  92. There’s so much…. personality in some rooms, and so sterile in others. That suspended bed did me in, though.

  96. I love the pool. I love the front outside of the house. I like the kitchen. I HATE the bed. Overall, I’d want to see the house in person, but I think I’d give it a pass because it’s so blah for the most part. Too many mirrors and the floor have little to no texture as well as the walls. Given the color in the pool area I’d think they’d have more fun with the rest of the house.

  99. Oh my how interesting. I would hate to keep the windows clean. Someone had fun designing it

  100. OMG! Thank you! Now I know what it looks like when you give a 9 year old all the money and let them build a house.

  102. I’m embarrassed to admit this, but occasionally I’ll watch Twilight because I love the Cullen house. Mute the sound and ogel all the steel, glass, and light. That’s modern industrial done right. Not this hot mess.

  104. It’s like someone thought “I really want to live in the Florida keys without living actually IN Florida.” For which I can’t blame them, but then I imagined my North Carolina cousin and his family living there…and I’m pretty sure my brain imploded.

  107. Im not sure what to say…I wish that was the only example of strange in NC but its not.. An hour from Wilmington is a house where there is an Neon Orange Dining Room with 24 K gold worked into the crown molding. I wish to god I had gotten a pic!

    Try Morrisville or Bellemont…I think they are more normal there.

  108. Did anyone notice the hanging bed is in very public space, as in right next to the dining room?Thinking this is NOT a sleeping space.

  111. sooo. the swinging bed “thing” is right next to the dining room table.. That’s dinner and a show right there!

  112. Okay the bed kills me but not as much as the poor AV work. I properly hung and wired TV should have all the wires and plugs hidden. You should see a TV on the wall. Period and nothing else. (shudder)

  113. I sincerely hope this was either built to the home owners specs or that the architect was shot. This ‘house’ is a mass of weird design choices unified by… nothing. It’s as if someone took a bunch of architectural magazines, pointed at different rooms and then had that built (on the oddest shaped lot they could find in the bargain).

  114. I wonder how one would feng-shui that house? At least you wouldn’t hv to worry about calorie consumption; you’d consume mass quantities of calories going from one end of the house to the other, that is if you could actually find the other.

  117. That’s a LOT of glass block. And why do I hear “bow chicka wah wah” porno music in my head while looking at the slide show with that hot tub bath, those mirrors, and the swinging bed????? Just saying…..

  118. Dear God, the amount of money it would take every month just to keep the windows clean, let alone the sheer square footage to clean. Can you imagine chasing toddlers through there, add in pets with nose prints, shedding, wet fur from the indoor pool, and the cleaning crew every week. More money than sense, a great place to tour and snicker about. It makes my practical self shudder.

  120. I find myself wondering what Dinah’s thoughts would be if she ever had to make a room like the ones in this house. That then led me to wonder if Dinah even COULD make a room like one of these, since she would have to be be able to imagine something like this. But then, maybe she looks at houses online too. 🙂

  123. A little paint, a few new curtains…. and I still would be unable to live there. But it would be cool vacation house.

  126. When you all said hanging bed I thought of the Raksura series bumy Martha Wells…those same but from tree material!!

    On real life is too much, not all ideas are gems.

  127. I’m picturing an architect who didn’t know how to say “no.” Is it sad that my favorite room in the house is the garage?

  128. I am almost embarrassed to say but I get it. Furthermore I will not judge how consenting adults get their kink on but… who is the real estate agent that doesn’t stage the house so everyone is not guessing their hobby? Surely the ropes and mirrors can come down long enough to sell the place?

  132. In the spirit of Halloween, I would say that Odo designed this house for Catherine O’hara’s character from Beetlejuice.

  133. Someone’s dream house, possibly drug induced. All weird angles, no logic to it. Then there is this utterly ordinary to ultra dull kitchen. Someone thought. “Gotta have a kitchen I suppose.” Have to admit though that they were doing their bit to keep window washers employed.

  135. Wow what a wild ride that picture gallery was.

    “Ew wtf is that.”
    “Ooo that’s really nice.”
    “Ok now wtf is that?”
    “Oh I really like that!”
    “Seriously?! WTF is that???”

    10$ says somewhere in the room with the suspended bed, is a stripper pole.

    I think the person who designed this house only watches mob movies and desperately wanted that Boca Raton/Velour tracksuit life.

  136. This is what happens when you have a person involved with chronic indecisionitis…”ooh, shiny! Let’s add that too!”

  137. LOLOLOLOLOL!!!! I guess it’s true… just because someone has lots of money doesn’t mean they also have taste…

  138. Good luck to the realtor trying to sell that house designed by someone with, as my father used to say, “more dollars than sense”. It’s just plain ugly. You’d have to cut down a forest to use all the fireplaces. The bed hanging is just laughable. Lots of land with it, but why is the house in a corner of all that land? Ugh. Just a bad idea someone had after too much partying — that’s what it looks like to me. All those windows, and sitting on the corner of the lot, you’ll go broke trying to keep people from looking in, I’d say. The kitchen is so big that you could run catering out of it. That is not a house for real people to live in. There’s so much wrong with it that you can’t even begin to list them!

  140. My own thoughts on what must have gone on in that house are making me blush!! Oh, my…..catastrophic natural disasters are not always a bad thing. 😉 😉

  142. They loved the lap pool so much they had three paintings made to create a mosaic of it their den/something. That’s some different vanity.

  144. I think it would be fun to refurnish. Kick out all those fake plants and bring in a ton of beautiful real plants! With all those windows you could have a great indoor garden! That hanging bed COULD be a nice reading space if there were a cozy surrounding! Be open to the good things one could do with the house!
    Greets from Switzerland 😉 !
    Inga

  145. Well…. Isn’t that enough to make your eyes bleed?

    I’m surprised that they want $900,000 for the thing. Seems like they’d be offering that amount of money to whoever buys it to pay for the renovation.

  146. That suspended bed – either someone was used to sleeping a hammock, or considering the location in a public area, has a usage i don’t want to even contemplate…. And, i have to say, that is a pretty cheap looking hack for a suspended bed.

  149. Such an…. interesting house….. cant get my head around 3 bedrooms and 4.5 bathrooms though… What’s half a bathroom?

    • Just a powder room. Toilet and sink. 3/4 includes a shower, full includes a bathtub. Got all the way to taking the test for my realtor’s exam. I wouldn’t want the job of selling that house. Wow.

  150. It’s a bit better than the listing for the Pennsylvania house with the high end Bondage playroom in the finished basement.

    • I like that BDSM Airbnb much better than this one. Better architecture, nicer furniture, good taste in style, if specific in substance.

  151. The problem with the hanging bed from my perspective is that there’s no way to sit up and read a book in it. That takes away a good bit of the functionality!

  152. What in the goodness was picture 19 of 28?!? I get the indoor lap pool, but a bungee bed?!? Okay, I’m not wealthy enough to appreciate this house….

  153. That house looks like they couldn’t decide which style they wanted, so they used a little of everything. Problem is, it’s very disjointed visually.

    There’s no way they’re getting that asking price unless the lot itself is worth it. Honestly, for all that I’d need to change about this, it’d be easier to tear it down and start over.

  154. This reminds me of an assignment my 7yo had to design his dream house. No ball-pit in this one, but he doesn’t think it would be too much work to install one. Plus a zip line, obviously.

  156. Anyone remember what a Franklin stove is? My aunt owned one and it was like a fireplace that sat away from the wall so that it could heat a room more efficiently. There appear to be at least two in the house in question. I thought the house was well lighted with soothing colors. It reminded me of some Hollywood homes I’ve seen in movies. All the non-square rooms are unusual but not ugly. The hanging bed made me wonder if a handicap person had lived there and needed a place to rest but still be a part of family activities. If I could still climb stairs, I could enjoy living there.

  157. I was going to ask what they were thinking, but I see the house was built in 1981. That totally explains the Miami Vice cocaine party house decor. I do like open floor plans, but that… is just a giant mess. I can’t even imagine what utilities would cost!

  158. This house is supposed to be 5868 sq ft, 3 bedrooms and 4.5 bathrooms for sale at $899,000.

    This house simply does not look that large. The kitchen is small, the bedrooms are small, the kitchen is small, where is all the space???? Are they including the pool room??? It makes no sense.

    The rooms all look small, there is no sense of space or grandeur at all in this house.

    I would be careful getting drunk in this house it would be too easy to get lost.

    I hope no one with vertigo tours this place.

  159. Everyone dreams of an indoor pool. My aunt lived it for years. Until she got tired of the Nightmare upkeep from dealing with the humidity. Rotting beams, peeling paint. Had to switch to saltwater because of smell of chlorine in house. She eventually filled it in and turned it into a huge master suite. Increased the value of her house by quite a bit.

    But she did not have a swinging bed off her dining room. LOL. Looking through those pictures, I couldn’t get past all the excess everywhere, only to have such a ho hum kitchen with builders grade cabinets. Guess they weren’t cooks.

  160. Not that bad. plastic trees can be changed, beds can be removed and replaced. Has a lot of light and views. Lots of land. Good room space. Look past the nasty and look at the bones of the place.

  161. Oh my goodness, 2020 has unhinged my brain. I took in all the weird and dubiously wonderful and was most disturbed by the closeness of the trees to the house and the bushfire risk. I’m my defence I am an east coast Australian so late 2019 and early 2020 had already done a number on us many, many, many times before Covid-19 became a global menace.

  163. What if you had to go to the restroom in the middle of the night? There is no way you would survive the trip at my age. This is the perfect house to buy to kill your elderly mother-in-law! My conservative brain has exploded!

  164. Ummm…another question. I don’t think those are plastic palms. If you will notice, I believe there is a broken coconut at the foot of one tree. The leaves have been waxed to make them shine but I think they are real coconut palms.

  165. In some ways, I feel like this is a possible outcome of my style of decorating– pick individual elements I like and then put them together. Fortunately, things I like tend to all be in the same general family of things. But that sort of thinking is, I think, how you end up with all of the random stained glass and glass block and so on– you like that stuff and put it in and don’t think of whether any of it’s going to blend.

    But then there are things like “floating bed”, plastic palm trees, and mirrors mirrors everywhere that are just– what? Even the stained, leaded glass doors with the rainbows in them kind of make me cringe, and I like bright AND stained glass.

  167. This is literally every Miami 1980’s Art Deco trope thrown into a single property. What a nightmare to try to sell. I wouldn’t even bother tying to sell the ‘house” portion, I’d just say, look at the land, gut and/or demolish the house.

  168. Hi,

    Well, I may be the target audience (of one!) for this house. It isn’t my taste, but oh goodness, somebody put their heart, soul and all their passion into the place…I guess I would be tempted to buy it for the walkway where you can almost touch the trees…

    Not sure I want to dwell on the bed tho!

  169. Wow. This place makes me think of old James Bond movies with Sean Connery… It probably would’ve been cool in the 60s.

  170. I have so many questions… What’s up with the swinging bed and mirrors on the ceiling? Is it some weird Tarzan fetish? Was that dog doors mounted above the master bath? Who would want their dogs jumping through the wall into the bath with them? What’s up with the giant greenhouse attached to the bedroom with a wood burning stove in it? Why is there a ceiling fan in the closet? This place reminds me of one of those old rundown hotels on the Vegas strip you see in 1980’s movies.

  171. It’s really all about the photos of their own pool hanging in the living room that says it all….

  172. Well all I can say is that the designer was a big fan of transparency!
    It’s like an”adult” tree house fantasy made by a glass factory owner!

  173. Can I just say80s tacky at its best . All I can that what 900,000 gets in NC. The best part was the swinging bec

  174. Aside from the location and the decor, seems like a great way to wait out a pandemic. (Yes working 16-18 hour shifts through this has officially broken my brain)

  176. This version of the original Maimi Vice is not at all attractive. I like the house marketed for sale as an active BDSM Air B&B much better. It had nicer architecture and better taste.

  177. Wow. I can see some crazy House having a compound like this where every Prime got to decorate one room for themselves. But, you know, since they are a House they are ‘eccentric’ with Bern walking through and his poor Magistrar senses trying to make sense of it all and just giving up when they get to the weird black room with the fireplace thing and the two uncomfortable chairs. I mean… is that the torture room? Is there a drain the floor?

    And all those columns. A Greek married into the family and just stuck columns everywhere to make it feel like home.

    In short, imagining that this house exists in a different, fictional, reality apart from our own is comforting to me.

  178. His and hers fireplace…. For some reason my mind’s eye keeps looping back to that double fireplace. I could at least grasp most of the rest… As my mother would have said – far too much money and all their taste in their mouth. But that fireplace. Why. I’m completely flummoxed.

  179. Is that . . . a waterfall above the his/hers fireplaces? And I wonder what came first, the tryptic painting of the pool, or the actual pool?

  180. This reminds me of the pool house in true blood. The main characters go to meet the vampire queen of some state area, and she’s in this brightly (sunlight bright) lit indoor lap pool house with fake greenery so she can wear a 50’s pinup style swimsuit and hang out with her vampire groupie pool boys and hold court

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