Sometimes when writers are working, our minds enter this strange place where reality is a bit distorted.
Me: Canadian High Society.
Google: Canada High Society, a community of cannabis connoisseurs.
Me, very tired and misreading: A community of cannibal connoisseurs? In Canada? They are so polite, why in the world would they allow cannibalism… Is this even legal? Do people donate corpses to them after death? … Oh.
Friend: Could you read this and tell me if it’s too violent?
Me: … Yes.
Me: She cuts her clitoris off.
Friend: Right, so it’s too much?
Friend: A wormhole is a transcendental bijection of the spacetime continuum, an asymptotic projection of the Calabi–Yau manifold manifesting itself in Anti-de Sitter space.
Friend: Okay, so I know that in theory it connects two distant points in space.
Friend: But do you know what that bijection word salad actually means?
Me: No idea.
Friend: I have read three articles on physics and I don’t know either. I researched this all day, my brain hurts, I am tired, I wrote no words, and I still don’t have enough knowledge to bullshit so it would seem like I know what the hell I am talking about. Why am I doing this to myself?
Friend: So he throws him into a wall, and then the wall breaks, and the werewolf is like right on top of him, and my guy is on his back, and I think he should do that thing where you throw sand into the opponent’s eyes.
Friend: Do you think when the wall breaks, there might be some sand? Like would the mortar between the bricks crumble enough to make some sand?
Me: The wall is brick and it breaks?
Me: Why doesn’t he just throw a brick at the werewolf?
Friend: OMG. I need coffee. Like a gallon of coffee.
Me: So what do you think?
Friend: I think you were tired.
Friend: It reads like a movie script. What was he feeling here? And here? And over here? I am really invested in this couple and you made me so frustrated, I want to shake you until their feelings fall out!
Me: I’ve read it, it’s really good, there is just one thing.
Me: Is the heroine diabetic, because she constantly wants to go to the bathroom?
Me: It’s just that the need to pee is mentioned six times in the first 50K.
Friend: I had to meet the deadline, so I locked myself in my office with a giant coffee and wouldn’t leave no matter what until I made the word quota for the day.