Exciting news from our friends at Graphic Audio: the full-cast dramatized adaptation of White Hot, Hidden Legacy Volume 2, is officially available for preorder on the GA website, with the release landing in your ears on September 4th!
The preorders on Audible & co should appear late next week, because we’re getting preferential treatment hehe. Usually, we wouldn’t see the September preorder data for another month or so, but GA are making a special exception for the Horde. Just for being our awesome selves. Or maybe because they fear our uprising, who can really tell. It’s a mystery.
And then we’ll have samples and ferrets, and cookies and Leon, and ferrets and samples, and sirens and Bunnys and Rogan POVs and ALL the stuff. Fluffy!
“But Mod R, w*iting? Again?! Change the tune!”
A-HA. You know what we don’t have to be p*tient for? Small Magics in dramatized adaptation, the latest in the Kate Daniels world releases by the spectacular Nora Achrati and golden team.
It comes out tomorrow, June 12th and can be found on the GA website and all usual other retailers. Nora will be taking a small break from kicking butts as Kate, and then we’ll get both Wilmingtons AND Blood Heir in the first half of 2026.
Now. Speaking of hot issues, here’s another emerald blazing problem for you (see what I did there?). I need to tap into Horde wisdom.
I’m *officially* out of the loop on email etiquette trends.
I learned English in school, in the former Eastern Bloc. For over two generations, our knowledge of English was preserved in academic isolation, untouched by anything as messy as the reality of how people actually talk. My teachers, who’d never even met a native English speaker, drilled into me the importance of ‘Dear Sir/Madam‘ and ‘Yours Sincerely‘ from textbooks older than my mother. In my culture, formality means politeness. The more you respect someone and the bigger the age difference or favour you’re asking, the more you ramp it up.
Which means I arrived in England 16 years ago perfectly primed to be an anachronistic little ball of passive aggressiveness.
Who knew ‘Yours sincerely‘ basically means ‘I want to hit you with a chair‘? I found that out the hard way.
I got by with Regards (kind, warm and otherwise) for a while until a work colleague pointed out it’s the embodiment of the side eye emoji. You might as well ‘per my last email’ someone.
I’ve been Best and Best Wishing for a couple of years. Happy insert-day-of-week! Times are hard, don’t judge. I knew it was boring, but I thought I was safe. Gen Z comfortably fires off ‘I hope this email doesn’t find you. I hope you’re free’, ‘Please hesitate to contact me’ and ‘Unhingedly yours’. I’m not there yet. I can’t even bring myself to XOXO, Gossip Mod.
Mr Mod R peeked at my email this morning and let out a chuckle (blood-curdling in hindsight). “Best wishes. Harshhhhh. What did they do?”
Who can keep up?! Not moi.
I trust your collective brilliance to guide me out of email faux pas territory. Drop your favorite email openings and endings in the comments below. Help me keep the Horde’s chalant-but-kind reputation intact.
Mod R, signing off (with whatever you tell me is cool)
Regards is completely fine and totally neutral – at least in a work/professional context. I also use Thanks! pretty regularly with coworkers in an attempt to be less formal. Honestly, even sincerely (on its own, not “yours sincerely) might sound a little old fashioned but shouldn’t get anyone’s hackles up.
For greeting a regular old Hello, Good afternoon/Good morning, is also pretty innocuous.
I learned from a shark of a divorce attorney “With warm regards” was equivalent to a declaration of war which would involve bathing in your blood. She only used it as a weapon of last resort.
I came from your school of thinking. I was shocked.
I use Cheers ubiquitously.
Big Love! For the 6 people I actually like.
I work in the corporate world and what I use and see most is “Hello, ____” and I normally sign off with “Thanks” or “Thank you” if it’s a neutral or friendly response and “Please reach out if you have any questions” which in my mind translates to “If your too dumb or self absorbed to get it, I’ll get out my crayons and draw you a picture”
No one’s called me on it yet, so good enough in my mind 🙂
Write whatever you’re comfortable with. I’m 59 years old and write emails and texts the same as I was taught to write letters. I recently saw an article that said this last generation (I think they’re called Gen Z) found punctuation like periods to be harsh or passive aggressive, God only knows what they consider commas. If someone doesn’t like the way I write emails or text they can bite me, there’s nothing passive in my aggression. And for God’s sake people proofread, spellcheck is no one’s friend.
I love “there’s nothing passive in my aggression”!! So, so much. And really, how is a period harsh? Soon there will be no punctuation, and no one will understand anything anyone says.
As a CEO’s executive assistant, I send/reply to a lot of emails. I have the same issue, along with the problem of using too many exclamation points so that I sound friendly (it doesn’t work; I end up sounding unhinged). I’m afraid I’m of no use to you on this issue, but I feel your pain!
Take care,
Jenn
I’m 67 and still use correct forms of address. I dislike all the slang and abbreviations and don’t get me started on emoji. shakes stick. I don’t have a stick incidentally.
This is me apparently hopelessly sinking in word quagmire. I’m 74 and what you see is what you get.
Lawyer here.
Greetings and sign offs totally depend on audience. Friendly adversaries get hi and end with ‘cheers’. Folks I don’t know yet ‘regards’. Folks Who Have Done Wrong get ‘Govern yourself accordingly’ which I did not know when I was a wee proto lawyer is the equivalent of ‘go F yourself, your legal position, and your ancestors to the tenth generation.’
Non lawyers get ‘cheers’ or ‘kind regards’ so they won’t think I am soulless.
Here in Canada, we end with “kindly govern yourself accordingly” to the nasty lawyers. We are always polite, eh?
I forgot the Kindly! I realized after I posted. Yes, we Canucks do add that teaspoon of sugar, don’t we!
I felt bad leaving it off which shows how ingrained our manners are! 🤣
I’m adding that one to my repertoire of salutations! 😂
I searched through the comments to see if anyone had included this gem. It is truly the equivalent of throwing a grenade at opposing counsel.
I’m an elder millennial. I still double space, use the Oxford comma, and end my emails with “sincerely,” so clearly I’m an old fuddy duddy now.
𝐄𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐁𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠:
Hello [name],
Hope you are doing well.
…
𝐄𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐥 𝐄𝐧𝐝:
All the best,
HA
Professional/Business e-mails:
Just start with the name. Mr./Ms. (as the case may be) Last Name. Then, depending on response, just First Name
End with: /Marisa or /business name, address etc.
Friend or Family e-mails:
Anything goes. Even Emojis, which should NEVER be used for professional/business e-mails.
Also, as you can see, I am old school. Periods are necessary and I always use them in any type of e-mail. Also, sorry but two spaces after a period is the way to go.
And grammar rules usually apply except for really close friends, who can razz you out if you do something really stupid.
ModR: just be polite and don’t sweat this stuff. If the reader/recipient is upset, they will let you know. All of us old…er, more mature people know that the salutations and endings are rote and don’t mean what they sat.
SAY, not “sat”. (Arghghgh)
Actually, using emojis in business texts or emails can be downright dangerous:
Last December, the Saskatchewan Court of Appeal upheld a decision by the King’s Bench that texting an emoji of a “thumb’s up” was enough of a signature to bind a farming corporation to a contract to deliver 87 metric tonnes of flax.
It was quite fact specific but after a phone conversation, the would-be buyer emailed a scan of a contract to the potential seller’s representative and asked for a text confirming that the contract was accepted. On previous deals, the seller had texted back one or two word acceptances. This time the reply was just a “thumb’s up” emoji. The buyer assumed that meant the deal was accepted and acted accordingly; the seller later claimed the emoji just meant they had received the document and would look it over later.
The courts ruled that the emoji amounted to both an acceptance of and an electronic signature on the contract. And awarded over $80,000 in damages for breach of contract.
The case is now on appeal to the Supreme Court of Canada. But the moral is clear: emojis have absolutely NO place in any serious communication.
Yikes! At most I risk a smiley to someone I know well.
Or, okay, an occasional meme. But never on a settle offer/acceptance.
I gotta read this case.
(Sorry, sorry – law nerd decloaking)
I wonder what would’ve been the outcome if it was a middle finger emoji?😳
Heard about that. Made me laugh. There IS fun in lawyering.
JLAgirl: If you want to look it up, the case citation is:
Achter Land & Cattle Ltd v South West Terminal Ltd, 2024 SKCA 115
It looks like the application for leave to appeal is being considered by the SCC. No decision on granting or refusing leave shows on the SCC docket.
Well, hello fellow two spaces after a period! I thought I was floundering alone in the vast deeps. They will take my second space over my cold, dead, body.
sorry, this was supposed to be a response to mz’s comment
It depends on the audience. I might start out with Good morning, (person) or Hi, (Person). Sometimes, it’s just Howdy! I might do a Good Morning or Good Afternoon. For signing off, it’s usually Thanks. It can also be Take care or Be kind to yourself or I appreciate you!
I typically start with ‘Hi or Hello’ or ‘Hello all’ or just ‘All’. I’m GenX and get and send so many emails internationally that there is no time to analyze subtext of greetings and closing statements. I mean if the whole email is cranky then fine the ‘best regards’ sounds kinda mean but otherwise…it doesn’t phase me. The only thing I avoid is ‘Thanks!’as I’ve realized it’s a perky girl thing to use and not super professional sounding.
well I was just schooled on “Regards”. used it in a blind email this morning. That can’t be true for all generations
Oh, this email thing is TOO funny! I AM a native English speaker (in a professional job where I have to write a lot of emails) and have been obsessing over email sign-offs for the last couple of months – I usually go with “Thanks!” but that doesn’t work if I’m not requesting something. I then switched to “All the best” but someone told me that came with baggage.
I absolutely DESPISE (with every fiber of my being – like, more than the Sunset Realty people or pre-redemption Hugh) the use of “Kindly” in any way, shape, or form – the amount of rage that bubbles up even just thinking about it is completely irrational. I think it’s because it always screams “spam! spam! phishing!” because SO many obvious phishing emails CLEARLY written by non-native speakers overuse “kindly” worse than Bran overused bad pickup lines (not my best analogy but my brain is tired).
So, anyway – this is completely not helpful to you, but if you figure something out please share it with the Horde, because I’m also floundering here.
I hope people will take it in the spirit it is meant, given what they know about you and your interactions with them. Meaning, if I know you at all, and even just through this blog as the mysterious and amazing Mod-R, if I know you are from the UK or former UK colony, then saying Cheers, at the end of the email would get no guff from my US self bc it is in context of you being you.
I also do a lot of work internationally, so whatever someone signs off using (or doesn’t!) I give a lot of grace because it may be their second language or they may have cultural differences. So I’d treat this new Gen-Z/Alpha whatever convention the same way- cultural difference/generational difference. I read the way it is written as it is most generously/positively interpreted and assume others do the same with me.
So, my advice is- don’t worry too much. Just pick what works and stick with it. If nothing else the consistency will give comfort to whomever is reading your emails 🙂
I think it’s best to write for one’s audience, so you might want to gently step into some “lightly hinged” options for the Horde, at least until you’re willing to let the training hinges go entirely. I wouldn’t trust my self employed chaotic responses for the rest of the workforce, so I’m no help for that area.
I present these options for consideration.
Opening:
“Hail, Book Devouring Horde!”
Closing
“Fluffily Yours”
(But seriously. As a Canadian, I usually sign off with some form of thank you if I can’t come up with anything more appropriate.
hooray for the Wilmington Years!
(won’t say anything about emails since there’s lots of comments on that already)
I am PUMPED for more Hidden Legacy GA! I already did a full reread/listen of Nevada’s trilogy after Burn For Me came out. I could not just stop there after listening to the GA audiobook. I anticipate this pattern will repeat for each release.
In terms of work emails, I am a victim of the millennial exclamation point.
I usually kick off with some version of “Hi/Good morning Team or Name”
If I have an action or request for a specific person(s), I @ their name in the greeting.
I always sign off with “Thanks! or Thank you!”
Unless I am particularly peeved. Then they get a comma. If we are true enemies, they get a period. I can count on less than one hand the number of times I’ve used a period.
And then I meticulously review how many exclamation points I’ve used in the body so I don’t come across as too unhinged. 🙃
Hello, I am responding to the information you requested. Someone once explained to me that emails are informal. Emails and texts have thrown proper English to the wind. I hope that helps.
Thank you for your time,
Esther
Back in the day when I was growing up as an “Air Force Brat”, good manners in speaking, writing and actions were drilled into me. I don’t pay any attention to the trends or changes to slangs and phrases and continue to hold to those manners no matter how outdated or outmoded others might consider them now. So depending upon the context it’s either “Dear Sir or Madam for opening and sincerely for close. In more personal situations it can be different for all different friends and family. I say be yourself! Because we find yourself delightful 😉
To start, “Hello” or “Hi”, depending on level of formality. Followed by one or two names. If more than two, then use “all”. If someone is being copied just FYI, then I will put that under the salutation, so they know they don’t have to do anything (whew!)
Usually “Best” at the end, because I often WANT the ambiguity. My husband hates that, like many on this thread, because it’s not specific. But in a lot of my work emails, I often don’t want to add the feelings, since they might not be pretty 😊.
If it’s someone I know a bit better, even in work context, then “I hope all is well for you and yours”. And I will also use emojis with such friendly colleagues. I actually don’t get the rap against emojis, because emotions can be easy to misread, especially in multi-cultural messages. So anything that helps a reader understand the tone/context.
And finally, my mother was an English teacher, so I will never skip the period at the end.
Wow, had a lot more to say about this than I thought I did!
I share your frustrations as a decidedly older middle aged woman. You see, my urban fantasy reading has added a wrinkle for me of, what if they are Fey? You don’t “thank” the Fey, they then conclude you are indebted to them. How do I politely and professionally end an email? *eek*
I have always resented that the fey imagine “thank you” to mean the same thing as “much obliged” when I interpret “thank you”to mean “I recognize the kindness you have shown” and not “I am obligated to you.”
It seems that they are arbitrarily taking meaning that is not there and twisting it.
Someone’s kindness or generosity offered freely obligates nothing, because then it becomes a contract whose terms you were not informed of beforehand. Want a contract? Discuss the terms openly. Yes, there is a sense of reciprocity, but like the initial gift, it should be given freely, because the giver wants to.
It may be too much thought to give to fantasy, but it always seemed unbalanced. 🤷♀️
For me, all emails start with Hello if I am being more formal or I do not know who I’m addressing. I use Hi for people I know well. For someone I’ve been having a series of conversations with, I frequently don’t even put a salutation. I think of the exchange as more of a text message.
The closing depends upon the message. It can be thank you or thinking of you or take care or I hope to hear from you soon. It just depends.
74 year-old American woman raised in the south, living in Texas.
I like ‘All the best’ if I’m not trying to send secret passive aggressive messages to the recipient.
Hehehe
I am also lost … just don’t say Bless Your Heart ❤️
That means you maybe a sandwich shy of a picnic … also never ask for just one grit
… that’s a Bless your Heart situation.
Have a great almost Friday the 13th …Take Care !
Dear xx,
Generic filler
May you have the day you deserve,
LOL!!! Love that ending.
Ow!!! I think “May you live in interesting times” might be worse, because it curses the recipient for a lifetime while this one is only for a day. On the other hand, that rather depends on the day….
I was taught letter writing and etiquette years and years ago, In elementary school . We were taught manners, how to make introductions and letter writing. I had Dear Sirs and To whom it may concern if you didn’t have a name. I used just Sincerely as a closing when I did office work!
If they are doing you a solid;
• Thank You. Regards, Bea (acquaintance)
If its your sweetie;
• Forever yours, Bea
If they pissed you right off, not the European pissed(drunk) but the NY one, where you even curse their predecessor‘s ancestors ;
•Fu*k Off, 😡(Emoji needed)
If you really want, need and desire something from someone;
•Appreciatively, Bea
If you want to get a better grade, seat, or salary;
•Respectfully Yours; Beatrice (bcse not a friend)
I got a ton of them from working on Wall Street. Lol.
As an aside, my brother and I send ridiculous emails to each other, with attachments. I don’t remember who started it but it has continued since ‘98. Since I’m the oldest I think he likes to correct my grammar 🤷🏽♀️
Don’t look at me. I’m a boomer. I probably learned that stuff from the same textbook.
As an American Southern Gen-X that has worked for Fortune 100 multinationals my whole career I can say I don’t give a flying fig what Gen Z and Alpha think. Being polite and using proper grammar and punctuation is a sign of respect and intelligence. if I’m emailing someone in the US that I’ve not communicated with before I open with Hello X, anyone in EMEA Dear mr/mrs/ms X , LATAM Dear X or Hello X. Once I establish a rapport, I generally switch to Hi X unless it’s a more formal EMEA country like Germany. I always close with “I appreciate your assistance ” Thanks. I work in IT so if it’s someone I communicate with often and know well I often skip the greeting and close and just state what I need. it’s beyond ridiculous that people try to read something into standard politeness. Unless of course it’s “Bless your heart” everyone from the south knows that is the worst insult.
Also, I forgot to say I work with many people from India and I absolutely love when they close with “Kindly do the needful” cracks me up every time.
It is a tricky thing! As emailing platforms have evolved I have started using “Hi” casual or “Hello” for a more formal greeting. I still do use “Dear” for a business letter or cover letter, even though the word seems awfully personal for that. 😅
I do sign off with Best, or Best In Health ‘cause that’s my field. I try to vary my sign off as little as possible so people will ignore it as visual white noise 😁
Most of my email openings start with “Hi” and the person’s first name. If it is someone that I’ve met, I may add “I hope all is going well for you!”. For closing, a couple of years back I started using “Respectfully”.
Oh no, I also sign off with Best and now I’m having a crisis 🤯
According to the ‘demographic’ I am a millennial. I have three children. One Gen-Z and two Gen-Alpha (despite being born 15 and 18 months apart)
I fully punctuate and proofread for grammar my text messages and WhatsApps [*whisper* yes, they are different… I still use SMS]
You do you, mod-r! I open with Good morning/afternoon and end with “Many thanks” (if I’m asking for something) or “Kind regards” (if I’m informing).
Because it’s polite, and if anyone has an issue I can honestly tell them that I got me first email address 25 years ago and am too old (at 39) to change my ways!
Wow! Poor Mod R! I’m not sure I even knew that there were so many negative connections! I always just used Hello, and finished with Thanks very much. However I have been known to throw in the Bless your heart or a Blessed be but those are generally more personal letters.
Don’t stress too much. People will see what they want to, you just write what you want to say and treat it like a belonging 😁 let it go and if it comes back it was meant to!
Good Luck! or Best of Luck two more endings lol
For work emails, I tend to start with either Good morning + their 1st name or Hello + their 1st name. Because we are a global company, we pretty uniformly use Kind regards + my 1st name to sign off.
For friend email, Hi for a beginning & either just my name or TTFN + my name to end (Ta ta for now).
I’m a doctor, so most of my mails are to patients or other doctors, so it’s
Take care
Hang in there
See you soon
Thanks
Aside from the standard
Sincerely for formal letters like accompanying resumes or the like
Then there is have a nice day
Cheers
Thanks for your time
Ummmm. Generation X here. I don’t actually see a problem with anything that you’ve been describing. Mind you, I use punctuation. Apparently there’s whole generations of people who freak out about that. So apparently I have nothing to offer except my chagrin as well. Good luck on your search.
No need for a personal salutation, just start right in with the message.
For the sign-off, I recommend:
Cheers,
And depending on the situation, you can say it with heavy sarcasm in your head, or a happy inflection, or a desperate wish for several pints after dealing with whatever shenanigans precipated the need to send any such message.
Soooo, I think it really depends on your audience. I work in the legal field and ” “Hope this finds you well”, “Good morning/afternoon”, “Best regards”, “Best”, “Thanks” are all considered professional beginning & ending salutations to emails at my job, and some of the ones you cited would get you a SERIOUS disc. w/ a supervisor. If I have more than a passing relationship w/ some folks at my job & I like them, I will sign off w/ “Take care” & may start with “Hey there”. In a different arena, who knows. I am actually shocked that anyone younger than Gen. X has anything to say about emails, b/c I am surprised when they actually use email outside of a job. My take?… Do what feels comfortable to you with the audience you are communicating with, & take clues from what others use when they email you from that same audience.
My advice is to never try to participate into the current trends originated by a younger generation. They will not only see through it they will cleverly take you apart as a poser.😉
I was searching online for more information on words I shouldn’t use in an email and it seems as though there might have been a reference to the snarky side of all the “Regards” on that show “Schitt’s Creek …pop culture sprouting legs and running amuck.
As I’m sure some older people would tell you the Southern ” Bless your heart” wasn’t always a negative.
Bless your heart is a lovely phrase- it can be sincere and caring, and then… well, not so much. 🙂
“Thanks (either ‘,’ or ‘!’, depending on tone)
[my name]”
x-illennial non-business-email-user here so formality in email is something I find absolutely baffling, but this has always seemed to work for me.
As someone who consorts with wiccans and other pagans, I often write “Blessed be”.
Or at the other end of the spectrum for those who really know me, just ‘b’. Not capitalized. Not my full name. Coz I am lazy.
Dear *their name*,
Best *my name*
That is it but I am 50 so who knows.
With friends, I usually start my emails with
Smiles,
or for distant friends/acquaintences, people I want to reassure I’m not a villain:
Smiles and peaceful greetings,
for closings, with friends, again, I use “smiles” with some happy emoji’s …
with strangers, I generally use Respectfully,
Actually, if you spell most of the words in your epistle correctly, and watch the tone of the body of your message, it pretty much doesn’t matter what you close with. Getting someone to read it is the hard part, so it’s wise to focus on your opener. You have a lovely, feisty, frisky sense of language, so I am sure that if your playfulness is reflected in your letters, there is no problem in getting people to read them. Smiles, peace.
I’m Scottish and been living in Asia for over 22 years, and F$%^ me I did not know the “ulterior motives” for e-mails. Ah well, as I have no intentions of changing, good luck to those on the receiving end of my e-mails. 🙂
My opinion: anyone not willing to give you the benefit of the doubt and take your polite mode of address at face value as actual politeness, is the one with the problem, not you.
Australian Gen X. This is how I roll and it’s been fine.
Dear Innkeeper,
Thanks for your email about werewolves. I appreciate your time.
yours,
Me.
Well, I did not that polite expressions are offensive. Same as HA, I learned English from textbooks, especially in academic writing it was described as a necessity.
Yours sincerely
Robin, CZ
Unrelated to the GA versions … Kobo UK have all the Hidden Legacy ebooks at £1.99 today (13/6). Not sure how long for, but if you’ve missed any of them, sounds like a good time to stock up.
+1000
Hello ModR and fellow Horde members and Happy Happy Friday to all!
Am on a quest that solo research could not resolve and am seeking guidance to ensure I am not missing a secret map or decoder ring……..
Purchased the ‘Listen with Access App and Browser Player’ option of Small Magics from Graphic Audio and am not finding an obvious way to select individual stories in the file (am listening on my phone). My research thus far is indicating Graphic Audio productions don’t follow distinct chapters as they are a dramatic production not a straight reading.
If there is a shortcut to finding the start of the individual stories I would truly appreciate any guidance – Thank you! (if the answer is (based on the version I purchased) record the start times as you go) – I can work with that – just wanted to double-check should I have missed something……
My apologies if this is NOT the right place to ask this – just delete if so – and redirect if needed.
Wishing you all peace, health and safety!
I usually start with Hi Mod R, then end with Cheers, Renee
Safe, and short LOL
I love reading what everyone is saying and will probably adapt and use some of what’s been said. As a 74 yo nurse, still working and sending out tons of emails, I need to up my game from just saying “thank you”
I had to share this. Elizabeth Wheatley, one of my favorite TikTok/ YouTubers, did a review of Fated Blades. She’s an author and has a big following. She did a 90 second review of Fated Blades, and I had to share.
https://youtube.com/shorts/DyCOkeQyLW8?si=O_VbVJBp0lVL4qbN
This review is GLOWING, y’all. It may sound silly, but I was thrilled for y’all.
French dictionaries have a few pages on the back with how to sign off letters in different circumstances. I found it super useful when I was in college. But signing off in English with “I hope this finds you well, with my most sincerest regards” seems overly complicated lol. I sign off all my work emails with “regards”… no qualifications…cause you know, they could be good or bad regards. 😉
I use Dear xxx/colleagues and Best for literally every email because it has the least number of letters. I figure if you never change what you write, people are reaching if they try to overinterpret.
Also, I work in an international workplace, so everyone’s understanding of English is a bit different although we are all professional speakers. No one is as passive aggressive as the British, and the rest of us should not be expected to play by their (absolutely mental) standards.
Best,
A Native (but not British) speaker of English
Basically
Hi, or their first name
sign off with thanks, catch ya later, see you soon, or your first name.
Exceptions for more formality on first contact or someone truly in a stratospheric position to you, unless you have established a casual friendship or staye of interaction. Plus different rules for England, especially if anyone has nobility.
oh and exceptions for Japan, they are a very rank aware society. They get old fashioned writing formality to start.
Greeting: Good morning/afternoon/evening/day/etc – avoids the messiness of a gendered greeting and no one cares about my hopes and dreams about the email I’m writing
Send-off: Thanks! – If it’s a passive aggressive email I leave off the exclamation point. Again, I figure people don’t care about my level of regards and wishes for them. Just gratitude and then mic drop.
I say “Hi ___, I hope you’re having a nice day ____ (day of the week.)” or “I hope you had a nice weekend” if it’s a Monday.
To sign off I say “Warmly, Katie.” If they’ve made me mad at some point I switch to “Thanks”. The tone is only in my head but it’s there and it makes me feel better lol.
That said, I think any of the options you used are fine. Maybe I’m getting old? But I wouldn’t read offence into any of your salutations lol
Mod R,
Often I skip the intro, because the letter was sent directly to you, so the recipient doesn’t need to be clarified. Then I sign off with some part of my name.
-S
My dear Mod R,
I am a native US-ian and all of this stuff is also hugely perplexing to me. I recently found out that young folks consider the thumbs up emoji to be snarky or even rude? 🤷🤷
I like to use “Greetings” as an opener, partly because it’s a little antiquated even for someone of my (apparently advanced) age and I find that humorous, but also because I can use it with a single recipient or multiple recipients (as these e-mails sometimes wind up being) with bonus points for gender neutrality.
I mostly use “Best Regards” as a closing. It never occurred to me that it might be seen as snide. I usually rely on snide comments in the body of my e-mail to communicate that mood for me. 😉
In both group and individual communications, I have always found you to be gracious, creative, and funny. I feel that anyone who does not perceive you that way may need to take a deep breath and clean their glasses. I also applaud you in your efforts to communicate clearly with people of all ages. (I think those efforts just support my point about you being gracious, creative, and funny. 🩵)
Very sincerely intended best wishes,
Lex
+1
and Needs to clean their glasses is awesome and I will promptly steal it. That is, if I can remember it after this post. 🙂
I’m at a rather traditional Fortune 1000 company, and we’re mostly varying flavors of bland: Hi/hello/dear/…thanks/best/regards…
Our Italian CEO just signs his first initial most of the time, but you can tell you did good if he says “ciao” first!
My favorite is the Egyptian SVP who likes to open with “My Dears…” and it fits because he’s the sweetest man ever, who always exudes warmth and takes time for each person.
Just write something that’s so long the recipient won’t read it all. then you can close with whatever you want.
Hey,
Hey Mod. R,
If it’s personal, one of those. Often Thanks! Or Thanks, at the end. If I’m emailing my clan to remind them to do their daily war attacks in Clash of Clans, I try to b more creative, but usually open w Hey y’all, I grew up in New England (northeast area of the US), so I consider Hey guys, to b non-gender specific, but since one of my clannies who is from a different part of the country hates that usage I tend to stick w y’all instead of guys. For them, my sign off is usually casual, sometimes funny, but defaults to Tc, or Thanks! (Tc=take care)
For more professional things, Dear name, and Thanks, or Regards,
I admit, I think signing off w Best is just annoying and a bit lazy. Best what?
As for ‘Yours Sincerely’, that seems odd. I’ve seen more ‘Sincerely Yours’, so the first one seems backwards. Anyone who reads it as aggressive is working hard to find offense, and there’s really nothing you can do about them.
Even though I know it’s unnecessary, I sometimes start texts to ppl I haven’t contacted today/recently w Hey name, . It just seems polite.
At some point I decided to read/listen to other’s communications w an assumption of good intent. I’m much happier living in my brain that way. And ppl who are ill-intentioned generally make that quite abundantly clear. And sometimes someone who wasn’t quite well-intentioned takes the mistaken assumption as a chance to make a better choice, given the second chance.
If it helps, Mod. R, I can’t recall ever seeing u b unkind or inappropriate. I’m kinda shocked to hear English isn’t your first language! I think you’re doing just fine, and don’t need to make any significant changes in how u communicate. There will always b ppl who read different things into what u write/say. Often that says more about them than it does u.
For business, I always use Thank you, my name. If I come off as formal and a little stuffy, oh well. Sometimes I switch it up with, Have a wonderful weekend when I feel a little more casual Friday. For family and dear friends, it’s usually Love, or Love you.
In my 50’s and I remember being shocked when my young adult child told me that using a period in a text is passive aggressive. Mind blown!
This week I had a similar shock with the differences in age and expectations.
I have a new secretary at work and this person told me they have never used MS Word. They just open all Word docs in Google Docs. 🤯 I’m not sure how to move forward.
Thanks for the lovely discussion.
Regards,
Sherry
56 here and who knew that a period in a text is passive aggressive? What?!? so just one long thought? And with all the abbreviations (which of course I don’t know) how do you even understand it? Man, I’m old.
This is a fascinating discussion. I’m Gen X so I fall in with the punctuation folks when texting. I can’t help it.
At work, I’m usually dealing with reporters on deadline or internal staff on deadline. So my emails usually start with Hi or Hi First Name and end with just my name with a tilde before it [~Name]. No closing, which I’m realizing can seem abrupt but no one has said anything. I’m in CA so we are casual. I do interact with staff and reporters in all time zones of the continental US – from CA to the South.
Occasionally, we get some international reporter requests, which tend to be more formal and I will be more formal to match their tone.
Hello Mod R,
LG
Annu
I’m german and “LG” is short for “Liebe Grüße” which bsically means Best Wishes sooo… yeah..
Kind regards
To elucidate:
Dear ModR,
Thank you for your inquiry into the correct salutations and valedictions for use in this modern age. For centuries, Debretts has endeavoured to provide the gold standard in such matters.
The link to their latest publication may be found here – https://debretts.com/thoroughly-modern-manners/
I trust this may be of assistance
Kind regards
Robyn
Hey,
Your (incredible amazing wonderful bloody adventurous) awesome books let me escape my crazy weird drama life in a healthy, non-bloody way. I appreciate you! So do my cats, they just don’t read where I might see them.
Thanks,
EliaDaCatLady
I hope they don’t leave more good stuff out. I really missed the squirrel.
Huh. Very interesting. I had no idea and of I don’t really know the person(s) receiving the email I use “Sincerely,” otherwise for emails to my usual groups I just sign off with my name. I never use a salutation. It usually is way more formal than I would want.
Good afternoon,
I approach all correspondence as an opportunity to focus on maintaining a polite cordial tone to avoid strife.
And I employ the below closing salutation for the same reason.
Have a great day,
Karen
I just do the most boring ending ever:
Thanks,
Fwiw, I never read all these other things into other people’s choices either. I just figured they were trying to stand out from all the other boring people like me. So if they were trying to ding me or side eye or whatever they utterly completely failed ( wha ha ha ha ha)
Hello Team –
I try to start business e-mails either with Hi/Hello Team (if multiple people) or if a few I make a point of listing each persons name. I try to add one positive comment about progress for the e-mail topic, even if I am writing about being behind schedule.
I try not to use the “you” or “you need” in emails even though I am frequently directing people to get things done on schedule.
Finally, I do sign off with Best Regards, but I think no one is reading the email by then anyway.
Finally, my company offers co-pilot so I get lots of AI feedback about my emails – mostly, lacking commas, to formal, direct and to the point. Sometimes I adopt some of the AI suggestions to be a little more casual and if I adopt a couple AI suggestions then AI usually tells me to be more formal and direct. That amuses me.
I try to write to people how I want to be written to.
You all are great, clearly smart, funny people – your emails are fine!
So say we all?
Opening: first name of person. More formal: Mr or Ms
Closing: Thanks, More formal: Thank you, Less formal: first name of self.
I use ChatGPT to review all my emails for tone… I learned a lot this way! Just ask it to review for tone and it will ask what your goal is; friendly, professional etc.
-Kelli
Well. I’ll be looking at the answers here, because I’m a native English speaker and I’d have thought your salutations and closures were fine…
No, I’m not a spring chicken
At work, I usually start emails with “Hello” and end them with “Thanks” or “Thank you” if they’re an everyday sort of thing or if I’ve asked for any help. (If I haven’t asked for help, the thank you is basically “thank you for taking the time to read this”.
If I’m being a bit more formal, I end with “respectfully”, and I have coworkers who use this closure all the time.
Finally, if I am offering info or support, I’ll close with, “Please feel free to contact me with any questions”.
If it helps with determining the subculture of my communications, I’m in the US (specifically Wyoming), and I’m a mental health counselor and work in a community mental health center, so “please”, “Thank you”, “respectfully”, “I appreciate that”, “Let me know if I can help” are important pieces of our interactions 🙂
My kid’s awesome muddle school English teacher signed off with “Take care.”
I immediately stole it. Sincere hug vibes!
I’m still on the prowl for formal ones that don’t make me sound more pedantic than I already am
Someone I know just got in trouble for starting all her emails with
“Hi, (insert name)….
Because apparently greeting and addressing the buyers by name is rude…
Meanwhile, my boss told me my emails were aggressive and to start adding smiley faces or something.
There’s no right way anymore.
Sadly, I am not now, nor have I ever been cool. 🙂 I, being Gen-X, quite frankly don’t understand the new slang/use of phrases -why would best wishes be a bad thing? Now that I’m no longer teaching I have no idea what the young ones say, my only clue to what’s new is my Millennial sister- which really is no longer that new. My greetings/sign offs depend on the person I’m writing to. If it’s business, or I don’t know the person very well, I’m polite and professional (well at least I hope so, but with the way things are changing, who really knows anymore?!?). Family and friends are anything goes.
Idk about everyone else but I’m a “Hey there, hello dear (with more established relationships) or simply, “hi,” and boring “hope to hear from you soon” kind of out of touch millennial. But this post has inspired me to adopt more of Gen Z vibe when allowable!
Also, I may be a minority, but I would be thrilled to receive emails in which I was addressed as Dear Sir/Madam, both, even though I am indeed cis gender woman. Please call me Sir.
Uh oh I use sincerely A LOT. Hmmmm, ugh. I thought I was being nice and polite. I seemed to have missed the boat,but I do live in the part of the U.S. where if you are not saying yes man, no sir, then you are getting the side eye.
I’m 67 and give zero Fs if people don’t like my “regards” sign-offs. None of my younger friends/family have complained. However folks prefer to sign off on emails is fine with me. If I don’t understand it, my fingers will do the Googling. 🤣😁