Exciting news from our friends at Graphic Audio: the full-cast dramatized adaptation of White Hot, Hidden Legacy Volume 2, is officially available for preorder on the GA website, with the release landing in your ears on September 4th!
The preorders on Audible & co should appear late next week, because we’re getting preferential treatment hehe. Usually, we wouldn’t see the September preorder data for another month or so, but GA are making a special exception for the Horde. Just for being our awesome selves. Or maybe because they fear our uprising, who can really tell. It’s a mystery.
And then we’ll have samples and ferrets, and cookies and Leon, and ferrets and samples, and sirens and Bunnys and Rogan POVs and ALL the stuff. Fluffy!
“But Mod R, w*iting? Again?! Change the tune!”
A-HA. You know what we don’t have to be p*tient for? Small Magics in dramatized adaptation, the latest in the Kate Daniels world releases by the spectacular Nora Achrati and golden team.
It comes out tomorrow, June 12th and can be found on the GA website and all usual other retailers. Nora will be taking a small break from kicking butts as Kate, and then we’ll get both Wilmingtons AND Blood Heir in the first half of 2026.
Now. Speaking of hot issues, here’s another emerald blazing problem for you (see what I did there?). I need to tap into Horde wisdom.
I’m *officially* out of the loop on email etiquette trends.
I learned English in school, in the former Eastern Bloc. For over two generations, our knowledge of English was preserved in academic isolation, untouched by anything as messy as the reality of how people actually talk. My teachers, who’d never even met a native English speaker, drilled into me the importance of ‘Dear Sir/Madam‘ and ‘Yours Sincerely‘ from textbooks older than my mother. In my culture, formality means politeness. The more you respect someone and the bigger the age difference or favour you’re asking, the more you ramp it up.
Which means I arrived in England 16 years ago perfectly primed to be an anachronistic little ball of passive aggressiveness.
Who knew ‘Yours sincerely‘ basically means ‘I want to hit you with a chair‘? I found that out the hard way.
I got by with Regards (kind, warm and otherwise) for a while until a work colleague pointed out it’s the embodiment of the side eye emoji. You might as well ‘per my last email’ someone.
I’ve been Best and Best Wishing for a couple of years. Happy insert-day-of-week! Times are hard, don’t judge. I knew it was boring, but I thought I was safe. Gen Z comfortably fires off ‘I hope this email doesn’t find you. I hope you’re free’, ‘Please hesitate to contact me’ and ‘Unhingedly yours’. I’m not there yet. I can’t even bring myself to XOXO, Gossip Mod.
Mr Mod R peeked at my email this morning and let out a chuckle (blood-curdling in hindsight). “Best wishes. Harshhhhh. What did they do?”
Who can keep up?! Not moi.
I trust your collective brilliance to guide me out of email faux pas territory. Drop your favorite email openings and endings in the comments below. Help me keep the Horde’s chalant-but-kind reputation intact.
Mod R, signing off (with whatever you tell me is cool)
Hi there, hiya, hello, hey Mod R
kindly, thanks
I use those greetings and sign-offs as well in my initial emails.
When responding, I take my cue from the greeting and sign off of the original sender.
+1
Most emails:
Thanks,
Thank you!
Best,
Sometimes – if I’m overthinking:
All my best,
Kind regards
I’m 72, retired and had no idea there was a hidden language within English other than my Southern “bless your heart”, so evidently I was telling people to go to blazes (or other more nefarious destinations) for years, which I now find absolutely hilarious. Owned my business for 35 years. Who had time for this nonsense, be cause I sure didn’t.
My personal correspondence, however,has been consistently signed All is well since I was in my 20’s because even if it isn’t right this minute, it will be. Not a Pollyanna, just a strong Southern woman who has struggled through more than a few of life’s challenges.
So my advice is speak your truth, sign off as sincerely as you can and become a woman known for her plain, clear speaking. This playing games with language is juvenile and time consuming.
I am All for clear speech. I know that no matter what I say it will be taken how the reader is wanting to take it. Words have a way of morphing. Find what makes you comfortable and let the freedom shine!
I think nothing of the fact that embedded in my personal email which I do use for personal business is the salutation “Blessed Be,”… For work I have long decided “Regards’ does not need a qualifier… take it however you feel to receive it.
I use blessed be as well when I’m signing witchy stuff, more formal is regards. But I work in HR so finding people well os kind of expected (lol). Worst comes to worst I’ll ask chatGPT to modernize for me.
And a blessed Litha to you too! (Sincere, not sarcastic!)
Agree completely. Enough already with beating up on nice words with mean interpretations.
You go lady, I too am a Southern and believe all this hoopla over words are silly
Say what you mean and mean what you say is brilliant…
Love your advice Meg. Generationally and also geographically things can pick up a subtext not intended. Living in the USA but also the south there is an expectation of manners like you were trained to do Mod R. So for older generations in the south you would be fine. I learned that what is polite in the south is not always welcomed in other areas of this country. But generationally even in the south traditional politeness is picking up new meanings for things. Then expand that to around the world and I imagine it can be overwhelming!
I applaud you for trying to learn about this for various cultures and generations but ultimately you will always miss the mark for someone. So give yourself grace because you will never make everyone happy.
In all of that I tend to sign off with “thanks” or an “I hope you have a great day”. But even that people will assume sarcasm when not intended.
Being polite is always acceptable! For colleagues with whom I work closely, friends and family, the greeting is usually informal such as Hi, Hello, Good morning, evening etc. And to close such an email, Cheers! One of my close colleagues who was English signed all of his emails TTFN (ta ta for now)😁 It made this Yankee smile every time,
+1
hear hear!
THIS!! — Only 69 here but preach it, Sister!!!! Say it the way that makes sense to you and let it go. Not your fault if their little pea-pickin’ hearts get offended.
Brilliant analysis. Of course I’ll be 75 soon, so great minds think alike?
love and hugs,
Joy
YES! Absolutely!
Respectfully Yours,
Me
Love the All is Well! So true.
Best regards!
Yes! I was taught formal email etiquette and only deviated for close friends. I did find that the more irritated or disgusted I was the easier the formal writing became, but I’ve also gotten in trouble for using sir or ma’am (which I still do because I fear the spirit of my ancestors far more than the spirit of what’s current.)
First? 🙃 and same here…
Being an Israeli I always think my English feels like “Greetings children of Earth” 😄…
You could always stick to Hebrew and go with “ben adam” instead :-p
Sababa 😁
I stick to Maori sign offs and hellos in most of my professional emails to New Zealand based recipients. I have been known to use the good morning/afternoon greeting as well as a simple hello after the initial exchange. For sign offs I use the following: warm wishes, best, and please hesitate to contact me again if I’m feeling fiesty
As an American who works with a lot of Kiwis, I find the Kia ora Kate, greeting charming.
Maybe we should just lean into it 🤣.
Fully “For the office of the esteemed Nuan Cee” everyone. What’s the worst that can happen 🫣
Being poisoned? 😉
Being run over? 🫣
Love it.
Signing a life-long contract of servitude?
Actually for you in your Mod R duties, the greeting to members of the BDH should be:
“For the office of the creator Author Lords of the esteemed Nuan Cee”
And the correct closing would then be:
“May your Revered Elder’s feet never touch the floor,
Mod R”
Too funny
🤣🤣😘
Love it!
🤣🤣🙄
🤣🤣🤣🤣😍😍
Lately I’ve been going with Hi X and signing off with “warmly”. But only if I like the person. If I hate them, I sign off with “best” which means “go f**k yourself” 🙂
😭 nobody told me about Best for so long !
I hate “Best.” Best what? Give me a noun, please, something! It feels dismissive and flippant. I’m aware that’s my hangup, and I don’t take it personally, but it’s just a pet peeve.
I’m a grad student and so many academics use this and I want to cry because what does it MEAN (especially when they’re doing thing like approving finance or criticising your work). But I also think they’re not the most socially competent bunch so it probably just means they’re just using it because they couldn’t think of anything better either.
I was perplexed by the “best” sign off in grad school and tried to read warmth into it for years, but once I left that environment, I decided the people using it were actually extremely emotionally stunted and/or full of loathing.
I’m absolutely full of loathing but that’s not why I use Best 😆
I use “Best,” if I don’t have a problem with them.
“regards” is for when I hate them like white hot fire. I’m not explicitly saying what kind of regards they are, it’s implied. but I don’t expect or want anyone to know what my personal taxonomy means, it’s just fun for me to know.
Oh no.
This has been my go to. Usually shortened from “all the best”. Guess I too will be diving into the comments for suggestions
I write hundreds of emails a week for work and they usually end in Best regards or Best. I don’t really think about what Gen Z would want because they make up such a small minority of the workforce. I’m mostly writing to millennials- boomers. Maybe this would change if my clientele were filled with Gen Z, but I doubt it. If that were the case then I’d just text them. (Don’t include periods tho because it’s seen as overly formal and smug)
Yes, because correct grammar is a sign of smugness. Sigh.
Whatever,
Best,
Have a wonderful day,
We can’t ‘win’
I learned today that being polite and friendly sends the wrong message.
I feel exactly the same way! I was reprimanded in my last job for my “formal” writing. I was shown an example of another colleague’s messages as something to emulate. The horror.
I am definitely going to use whatever from now on.
Hi X,
Attached is the document that you need. Thanks!
Whatever,
Me
As a southern woman, “whatever” with a sweet smile and some fluttering eyelashes, has traditionally meant “and you go right on to hell, honey.”
1. I didn’t know I was being rude?!?
2. As a Gen-Xer, I’m down for Whatever, as a sign off. We can’t win, so why try? Let our apathy shine!
I’m with you on this. I would totally use Best Wishes, or Have a wonderful day.
I found out that I’ve been behind the times for over decade because I use proper punctuation when texting though, so no matter what I do I’m borked.
Boomer and my mother taught English. If they can’t make allowances, too bad…I prefer to consider “formality” “charmingly old-fashioned” since I am Of A Certain Age…
That’s what I thought the first time someone signed off with a “Best,” Not the best way specially when you’re asking me for a favor 🤨
O_O I must be a dinosaur, I had no idea!
plus I type very sloww in English, so, not first.. 😂
Hooray to all the GA goodness! I will get onto GA, and pre-order. Thanks, Mod R for sharing all the goodness.
When I have to reach out to people at work via e-mail, I usually say “Good morning, [the person’s first name]”. For my e-mail ending, I will say “If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.” Then “Sincerely yours, Patricia”. If it is in a personal e-mail for someone who does not know me, I will put my last name.
I hope this helps, Mod R. 😀
Graphic Audio sent me a very nice surprise last night to download “Small Magics”. I didn’t have to wait until today to get it. 😀
Pre-ordered “White Hot”. Now I have the “Mission Impossible” theme song in my head. I also have “Your mission if you choose to accept is to infiltrate the mansion to obtain the hard drive. This will self destruct in 5-4-3-2-1.”
oh my go to is Hi *who ever* and I end with regards. I find regards can cover the line when you dont know where it is lol
my emails tend to open with hi/hey and then a Hope your week is going well or some other form depending on where in the week it is and how long it’s been since I emailed them last.
and the emails end with Thank You or Cheers depending on the content.
I’m in a professional space though so a certain level of formality is expected. I will dial it up/down depending on the recipient though.
I open with “hey” or “hello”, sometimes “good morning”.
I invariably end with “thanks”, but I also like “cheers”
“Cheers” seems wrong in international emails, which I have to send a lot.
I somehow expect to get a “🤨 do you want to go where everybody knows your name or something? we’re not drinking beer here” answer if I say that lol
Well, who knew all those email salutations were hidden land mines? There’s nothing polite left for professional emails but the ones you mentioned. I end my emails with lots of different ones depending on the context. Thanks and Sincerely are my most frequent. “Regards” is the passive aggressive way.
Non-native speaker here, who spent years in the UK (quite a while back, alas…).
The “cheers” discussion reminds me of a situation where a good British friend took me aside to point out that using “cheers” like that was, well, rather lower-class and I should really refrain from using it so as to avoid giving the wrong impression.😶 Let’s just say “cheers” to that, eh?🥂😅
If there is one thing that has definitely stayed with me from my UK days: if in doubt, be rather more polite than less…
I rely heavily on seasonally appropriate closes. Enjoy flag day! (snicker) Happy Spring/summer/fall etc. Bastille Day is around the corner
Canadian here. I also sign off with ‘thanks’ and ‘cheers’ often. Or if I need a response: ‘Please let me know; thanks’.
I work for an international company and many of my coworkers use ‘cheers’ too. Looking at my emails, they’re American, Polish, Swiss, Italian, etc.
Okay. Now I feel like a right rube!
I’ve ended all my blog comments with “Cheers!”
No wonder I’m NOT getting any love… [sigh].
My written letters and cards (eg: 30 some years ago) have always dictated my email greetings and closings: “Hello, [name],” and “Sincerely, [my name]” or “Thank you.” just like my middle school English teacher taught us (a thousand years ago!).
Mrs. Grant also taught us that women cannot stand up and give a speech to an audience with our feet shoulder-width apart and hands behind our backs like a soldier, or a man. No, we had to put one foot slightly forward, almost inline with the rear foot, toes a bit angled out, wear a skirt and a blouse like proper ladies, and absolutely no gum-chewing! (I think we might have moved beyond that particular female etiquette. At least, I hope so!)
I am a product of my generation. Despite my early adoption of personal computers (1982) and electronic gadgets, I still write lengthy “digital letters” to my friends, family, clients and the public in general.
My significant other says I love to “Jenn-s’plain” about most things. I can’t help it… I love stringing words and sentences together into paragraphs and essays (most likely unreadable and bordering on yawning-inducing) and more! (Just like the late night infomercial programs, “But wait! There’s more!”)
I should just write textbooks. Dry, lifeless and highly opposite of entertaining.
Cheers!
Oh, wait… I can’t use that anymore. I’m killing Mod R… How about:
Toodles!
I’ve been using Cheers for years (ha) with international contacts but I work in a fairly informal industry. I do ramp up to Kind or Warm regards with some Asian contacts due to language differences and the higher degree of formality.
Occasionally I will get a work email from someone I’ve never met in person closing with Hugs, which is funny.
I mostly don’t use any on impersonal emails exactly because of what you mentioned. Sometimes I use “dear sir/ma’am/agent or use a name or title if given. These I generally end with “thank you for your time.”seems common and safe. On personal messages, we’ll, they’re personalized 😄
I find your English charming. You are a fantastic writer, comic or otherwise. I very much enjoy your moderating of IA’s blog. It frequently makes my day. Don’t change a thing about yourself. That being said, I think we all struggle a little bit with the written word as a form of communication since it embodies only a fraction of what we actually meant to convey. Many of the new conventions help somewhat (think () or * or :, etc.) but I am old enough to appreciate politeness and totally understand the courtesy when someone respects me through proper salutations or signatures. More clarity is always a good thing, too. Keep up the great work!
Hi Mod R,
For formal things: “Thank you”
Less formal, but still not informal: “Thanks”
Otherwise: “Cheers”
Of course I’m a boomer, so …
Cheers, Kari
I am a Boomer also. I use Good morning or Good Afternoon and conclude with Thank you.
I usually start with Good (Morning/Afternoon/Evening)
And end with cheers , Thanks for your time, sincerely, kind regards depending on the context or previous contacts/ interactions
I always find the ending of emails awkward and spend too much time debating with myself on how it sounds so whether its professional or not I might even throw in a 😀
Our CEO signs off with Many Thanks.
We all eye roll because it’s unlikely there are thanks much less many.
Corporatespeak would make all of this even more tricky 😭
usually Hello, Hi all, or just their name if its something silly.
I have the formal ‘please let me know if you have any questions’ line most times. But sign offs are ‘have a wonderful day’ or ‘thanks’. But thanks I use as a special way for me to express displeasure, not that other folks use it that way.
Also people usually can sort out the vibe working with you a bit and figure out what is normal for you! So you don’t have to be hip in the ways that everyone else is (if you don’t wanna).
Sign on as Hello or Hey (if family or good friend)
Sign off as Best, or heart emoji if family or friend
My child horrified by stating periods . That nice innocuous sentence ended mean serious anger. She’s been thinking I’m mad all semester-yikes!
Oh nooooo. “Period” or the 👍🏻 response are genuine attacks hahahaha
In texting form, having a period is extra emphasis on the end of the statement. You can already see that the statement has ended because you are looking at the closed text bubble. Or like on this blog, you can see that the person has ended their statement because of the formatting of the comment. When someone adds an extra period it feels instinctively like they put extra force into the end of their statement, because you see the message end twice, once with the formatting and again with the period, thus coming across as passive aggressive.
I tend to compose like I am writing a paper for English class, so most of the time I will end up manually removing periods at the end of whatever I have written
Wow. I had no idea using proper spelling, grammar and punctuation was insulting. That makes no sense to me at all. I am definitely not ever going to be hip or cool. 🤷♀️🤦♀️
I think there is a narrative change needed. We can be hip and cool at any age, any ‘group’ you don’t need to be young or the latest generation.
I’m finding this thread entertaining and informative, land mines indeed.
Wow. Me either, Rita. Good grief, I’m lost and at sea. I’m going to deliberately wipe all this out of my memory because I like to think the best of people’s intentions. So, anyone who thinks they are successfully putting me in my place = nope. it flew right over my head! lol. poor dears.
I find that if someone does not use a period at the end of the sentence (whether texting, e-mailing, or other forms of communication), my brain thinks it’s a run on sentence, and what the person says does not make sense to me.
Then I have to go back and re-read it about 3-4 times to get what the other person is trying to say. For me, that wastes time.
The joys of changing language from generation to generation.
And I take the lack of a “period” to mean that the person wasn’t finished with their thought. So I sit there, waiting for the rest of the sentence. With my adult children, I can figure it out. Lag time mostly.
Everyone else? Not a clue…..
Yes, exactly. Just because a text bubble is by itself doesn’t mean that’s the end of a statement. My son (who is 21) texts me like this all the time:
mom
what did you do
with the
thing i gavu ths mrng
Like, what? We are smashing words together and getting rid of vowels and who cares about breaking up the full thought because I want attention so I am going to make your phone bing rapidly in succession.
Hi — (or Hi, [name] —
And I almost always close with Cheers, Magdalen. (I’m an expat American living in Scotland — “cheers” works for everyone regardless of the nationality because the recipient always thinks I’m being poncey.)
I work with a lot of internationals, so I get a LOT of “I hope this email finds you well.” (The senders are nearly all sincere, so I love it.) I’m actually kind of terrible because I usually just jump into whatever the email is about.
This reminded me of Kieran Healy’s Guide to Interpreting Academic Feedback. There’s one for US grad students with faculty trained in Britain and Ireland and one for UK students with faculty trained in US. Here’s the link — if that’s ok — ModR can edit if not: https://kieranhealy.org/blog/archives/2013/08/16/academic-feedback/.
In the mean time, I’ll be over here doing the Graphic Audio Happy Dance.
Honestly, I don’t think there’s a sign-off that couldn’t be interpreted as passive-aggressive. I tend to go with “thanks.”
THIS IS SO TRUE! Wish I could pin this comment. Everyone who works or studies with English people should read it.
That link would have saved me coming close to messing up my Masters thesis. My poor Financial Regulations professor kept saying it’s “interesting”.
I was thrilled and kept pursuing the angle deeper and deeper.
He must have been sweating bullets at my wide, earnest eyes.
When a professor says “interesting”, I tend to listen to the tone. Saved me from some academic potholes in both my Masters and Doctorate work.
Doesn’t cross the Eastern/Western Europe divide somehow. Or maybe just with me and my neurodivergent brain?
I’ve had years of feedback on “being too direct” when I was just genuine and earnest. And polite effusion British “interesting” was indistinguishable from “wow, you’re discovering new boundaries of Basel banking framework!” to me back then 😅
I had statistical professors from other countries, mainly from India. I learned to listen to the tone and the facial expressions. 😀
I was raised Dutch. Ain’t nobody direct like the Dutch – hoooo boy 😅 top that off with a circle of friends of whom well over 50% score as neurodivergent and yeah, I’ve learned to keep my personal and personal styles of interaction waaaaayyy apart 🙈
But there was a good xkcd a while back about email or correspondence go-to formulae – it saves so much time and energy to just go with the stock phrases, that’s what they’re there for! And being polite never fails imho.
What bugs the absolute stuffing out of me is that Outlook has emojis hard coded in nowadays. I don’t _want_ stupid yellow faces in my professional emails, buzz of! Drives me bonkers…
*darnit, “personal and personal” should read “personal and professional” 🙈
In French : Bonjour (very standard)
Salut ! ( if it’s a friend)
Cordialement, (standard)
Bises, Bisous (if it’s a friend)
Merci! Very helpful!
Mod R – I also struggle with the formality or informality of emails and texts. I looked through some recently sent and realized that in the first communication I leave off all greetings. I start with their name. Sometimes name and position/workplace info. And later communications, I will start with “Hi” or simply start replying to the last message.
I too am guilty of signing off with outdated phrases. I was today’s years old when I learn learned about “Best” lol. Unless it’s a friend or family, I sign off with whatever” hope to hear from you” reflects best the intentions of the note. And then I just sign my name.
It feels very strange to leave those things off; however, my communications usually have punctuation and all words spelled out, so that already makes me old-fashioned! I’m trying to embrace it and lean in to my unique identity as an awkward missive exchanger (which is difficult since I was a communication major in college back when dinosaurs roam the Earth🤪)
I really enjoy your humor and style of writing, please don’t change!
Anyone who uses a semicolon correctly can sign off with whatever they want, as far as I’m concerned.
Here, here!
Absolute truth! Cheers to that!
Hear, hear!
Regina
And apologies – or at least no sarcasm or corrections were intended. I had read none of the responses, was just responding to Kat M’s semicolon comment.
I end many personal communications, “Affectionately,” and punctuation is important to me. (Age 63.)
Fondly,
Regina
Or at all; at least they’re trying.
I keep it simple because I can’t worry about how someone might interpret my greeting or sign off because that’s a losing proposition! What works for one person might bother someone else. 🤷♀️
I start with Hi or Hello and end with my name (personal emails are very different of course).
A friend used to end letters with ‘Yours warmly’ and I adopted that for a while. I haven’t used it for years.
Hello Mod R!
I usually open with hello and end with just my name, but when I’m being formal I’ll sign off…
Best regards,
KathByrd
Wow. I didn’t know any of this. How have I not been fired yet? I mean I now it’s impolite when sometimes I get excited and crank out 3 paragraphs explaining the problem, why I’m contacting YOU about it, and what I think the fix is. Send it off with no title, no greeting, and no closing. Those I understand require some spade work to get out of the hole I’ve dug. But to find out I’m ALWAYS super rude? Yeesh.
This is me. I’m a bit more concise than I used to be in my youth, but I want to lay it all out there so we can avoid some of the back-and-forth and pages-long email trains. Hate that.
I usually open with “Hello” or “Hi”. If I’m feeling friendly or whimsical (and know the person I’m corresponding with), I might go with “Howdy!”.
I either use Regards or Thank you depending on my message and I work in Human Resources I try not to use anything that has emotional meaning attached as that can go very wrong.
The problem is not writing etiquette, it is reading etiquette – which is not taught and needs to be – widely! People read their own interpretations- often reflecting their current mood and things going on in life unrelated to what they are reading.
I go by the rule of thumb if something feels negative – take a break and go back later to read again with a fresh look. Try to take personal impression/opinion out and just read words AND look for positive intent. If you still feel it’s negative have somebody else check it before you respond. Get their take on it.
Love this!!!
So very true as a reader of many many emails in a global corporation where English is not necessarily the first language of the writer and cultural nuances can result in unintentionally humorous communications.
I learned to read everything through the lens of positive intent. And – if it OBVIOUSLY wasn’t (as recommended above) step away for as long as needed to ensure the reply was neutral and productive.
As far as greetings – always with Hello and individual’s name.
Closing – as context of e-mail indicated
Thank you for the help or guidance.
Let me know if questions.
Wishing you and those you love peace, health and safety!
ModR – please don’t let anyone get you down regarding your communication style. As others have mentioned your style is quite enjoyable and I believe your intent is always positive and sincere. If someone chooses to be offended that is on them alone and beyond your control.
And – many many squeeees regarding all the Graphic Audio goodies!
Sending peace, health and safety to all!
Oh my!!!
I sign off all my professional emails with Kind regards (unless we’re friends in which case I got with warm regards).
For colleagues, it’s usually: Cheers or maybe a smiley face.
but I’m a French born admin, so…
I hate however when people sign with: Best or BR, that’s very lazy in my opinion.
Therefore I’ll be reading the comments with diligence
Things I did not know as a Norwegian and non native speaker. I am also in academia so we are often overly polite and often intentionally passive aggressive anyway hehe
But I usually sign off with Best or Kind wishes and to some international coworkers Kind regards. Norwegians are really informal so second email is just a dash and my name.
I’m a “Best” signer too! (or kind regards). I just cant see how that is bad. It is definitely not being passive aggressive in my case. I just prefer ‘Best’ and ‘Kind regards’
From the comments, the fact that what’s best is not specified, like we can’t even bother. So too curt? But then “best wishes” is snarky, because there aren’t even fucks left to give, let alone wishes.
I’m now leaning towards “Thanks” for my new sign off. It can be thanking them for their time, even if I’m not asking for anything in the email? Which is usually true, I’m mainly the one responding to requests.
Ever yours, through the minefield
Love it!
Minefield — ha, ha, ha, ha!
I guess this whole blog post has been a bit of a minefield.
Now I can truly end with, “Thank you!”
Toodles!
But how would you sign off with “Thanks” if your email is to say “Thank you?” I send a bunch of emails related to things like “Thanks for handling” “Received with thanks,” etc. That would get weird to me.
Sometimes I’ll sign off with ‘thanks again’, esp to Asian people. But with short emails, that can sound greasy.
Mostly I use ‘cheers’ for fellow NZers and people I know, and ‘best regards’ for more formal. That seems to be the standard in my company.
And I open with Hi name.
And I’m in my 50s.
Huh. I think I mostly learned that same rules you did, but then again that was in my typing class where we still had some manual typewriters. I expect a lot of us are in the same boat. Texting & chat really changed things. Like other folks have said I mostly use Hi/Hello or Good Morning/Afternoon and end with Thanks. Because that’s simple and I don’t want to think too much about it.
When I write customer service emails, I sign off with, “Should you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to contact me at the information below.” That is followed by my signature block with three different ways to contact me. I still use that as a high school English teacher here in Houston, though originally from San Diego, CA.
For emails to colleagues that aren’t so earnest or urgent, I often sign off with “Thank you kindly!”
We also have the fun issue of an enormous country that has wildly different manners depending on the region. The West Coast area tends towards much more casual interaction as a sign of friendliness – we prefer to use given names, say things like “hey” and “thanks much,” that sort of thing.
Texas and the South prefer a warm formality, where we use surnames, “Hello,” “Sincerely,” and lots of polite small talk.
The East Coast is just as formal, but much more efficient. “Sir” and “Ma’am” are the default, but don’t waste time with chitchat – getting right to the point shows respect for others’ time.
Honestly, the most important tip I can give you is to be authentic. Use the language that feels right to you, be consistent and kind, and don’t sweat the small stuff. You’re a professional, brilliant, and kind person, Rosanna. We’ve gotten to interact with you for years, and never have I read anything you’ve written and thought, /jeez, what’s her deal?/ You’re a constant delight, and we’re lucky to have you caring for our Authorlords.
That’s so incredibly kind and wise, thank you!
Very true with all the regional variation, well said.
About the wasted time, couldn’t agree more! Of course I’m career military so I don’t feel the need to pander to feelings.
Seriously, I don’t have time for anyone’s superfluous inanities. You get a “Name,” as the intro and then a signature block at the end. Thats it.
I especially loathe the quotes before/after the signature block. Like I, a stranger, share your religious/philosophical/humorous beliefs. So vain and presumptuous.
Yes regarding the quotes – very annoying, especially if you correspond regularly.
I agree. That is why where I work have banned quotes from people’s e-mail signature lines. It gets nuts after a while.
I’ll second that!!
What Kat said!
I’m in the USA and I write a LOT of email for work. When the email is supposed to be professional and is going to my peers or one level up and any levels down, I do the following:
Salutation:
Good [morning/afternoon/evening] [Person’s name if there are 3 or fewer, otherwise it’s “All”]
Closure:
Please reach out with any questions.
Regards, Colleen
Example (to my boss):
Good morning, Boss,
I’m meeting with the tech leads this afternoon; I should have the server report to you by OOB tomorrow.
Regards, Colleen
If it’s personal/friends, I’m way more lax, and more creative with the closure.
Salutation:
Hey, [name]!
Closure:
Smile! / Happiness, / All my best and then some! / [adverb] yours,
Example:
Hey Sarah!
I messed up. The party starts at *6pm* not 8pm.
Flappily yours,
Colleen
“Who knew ‘Yours sincerely‘ basically means ‘I want to hit you with a chair‘? I found that out the hard way”
I’m sorry someone wrote or verbally told you that might Mod R.
I am wondering if this is particular to British English? I would never have read it that way having been raised in Canada and spending 5 years in Scotland.
I usually start off with ‘Good morning (or afternoon) X’. If it’s someone I know really well and like :-), it’s usually ‘Hi or Hey’. Sign off is usually just ‘Thanks or Thank you’ depending on the audience.
LOL same eastern block (PL), similar style of language education, similar formality in the culture.
These days I work in a very multi kulti environment, write dozens of e-mails in English every week to people from all over the globe, who all have different levels of formality in their cultures, and different expectations as to how they want to be adressed. My typical structure is “Dear [first name]”, or “Hi [first name]”, sometimes just “Hello” if they are a German and I don’t know if they’re ok with first names. ended by “Best regards”, or “BR”.
I can’t keep up. This stuff changes really fast these days, so if I’m replying, I follow the original writer’s cues to the extent that I’m comfortable. Currently:
If I’m the one making first contact, “Dear ___” or “Good morning ___”or “Hi ___”, very occasionally “Hey ___” depending upon how formal the context or how well I know the person (if I don’t know the name, it’s “Hello” or “Good morning” with no name).
For closing a formal business email, I’ve used “Yours” in the past, with no modifier if I can’t bring myself to feel truly or sincere. More commonly these days, I put in a line thanking them for their efforts/time/attention (one or two of the three) and close with some variation of “Have a great day/week” or “Enjoy the sunshine/weather”.
For personal emails, it might be one of the less formal ones above, or “Hope [all of] you are well and enjoying life”.
But I should point out that I’m a boomer, so probably the last one you should be taking advice from. I had to stop myself from rearranging that sentence to avoid placing a preposition at the end.
Being in Hawaii, I’m allowed to lean into common Hawaiian words. I use Aloha NAME to start and mahalo to end. You can also use aloha to end too if you don’t start with it.
BTW, today is a Hawaii State Holiday celebrating King Kamehameha. There will be lei draping of his statue today and a parade on Saturday.
Very cool!
Similar here in NZ, start with Kia ora, end with Ngā mihi (Thanks) or similar. Interestingly when using a Māori salutation I always put my first name in full rather than just my initial as I do in English – I think it’s a cultural thing. The most toxic person I worked with, and the most passive/aggressive both used “warm regards”. I cringe when I see it now :/
Maui here. I thought, I can’t really contribute because we are so lucky! Aloha and Mahalo … easy breezy.
I usually start with Hello and end with some form of thanks for actually reading my email. The standard English instruction of the seventies was Dear sir or madam, and ended with sincerely or yours truly, depending on the level of personal familiarity.
Those are now all relics of letter writing. Here and now in the 21st century I try to use wording that won’t be confused by Google translate.
I had never given this that much thought. I correspond with students through the school blackboard program about their work, and I open with Hi/Hello X. My closing is Have a good day/morning (time dependent), or Take care. I guess all of it is a little patronising or passive aggressive. Any suggestions?
Oh geeezzz. This native English speaking Gen x’er didn’t know this. In my corporate sphere we use all variations of “regards” & I’ve been seeing “Best” also. Now I’m wondering what subtext I’ve been missing!!! Oh well. I guess I’ll be comment diving also.
Mine goes like this:
Sup baby girl, (no matter the gender I’m emailing – they are all baby girl)
Email email email
Yours truly,
My name
As someone who struggles with tone, I just write what probably wont get me fired. 😀
My sweet boss signs all his emails with “Every good wish,” but he is a genuinely good human and actually means it.
I usually sign mine with some generic for higher level folks who are paid more than me or something a little more casual/fun for other folks:
“Kind regards,” or “Best regards,”
“Thank you,” or “Many thanks,”
or sometimes “Blessings,” (religious institution – although this one feels a bit passive aggressive)
More casual sign offs:
“Have an excellent Wednesday/terrific Tuesday/etc!”
“Slay your Monday!”
“All the best,”
“Thanks!”
“Yours from the trenches,”
“Yours from the stacks,” (for librarian colleagues)
If I know the recipient well then I’ll use a more fun or preppy sign-off, because why not?
“In inventory purgatory,”
“From hell,”
“Best of luck managing the American experience,”
Gotta enjoy life where we can, you know!
“Slay your Monday!” and “Yours from the trenches,”
I love those soooo much! Stealing for my emails!
Eh. I think the definitions of different sign-offs as passive aggressive is just an internet trend. I operate in a professional space and am a writer and find people are still using things like “Best regards” or “Sincerely” and so on. I use “Regards” because other forms bother me. However, I am autistic and adhd so I guess you should take this with a grain of salt. I just cannot bring myself to say Best Regards for some reason, lol.
Same – it’s Best wishes or Kind regards, and never the twain shall meet 😉
Useful, thank you
Don’t take that too seriously though, it’s just my pet peeve, not an actual rule!
I’d say (snarkily) to sign off with “May you live in interesting times” but perhaps I shouldn’t put that curse out there, I don’t need any more interesting times either!
From an exhausted Millennial with 234 “once-in-a-lifetime” events under her belt, that is truly a fear-inducing wish 😀
For any emails semi-professional and above, I just start with “Hi ” and end with “Thanks” or “Thank you” and then my name.
My passive aggressive way of ending a professional email is to have no signoff but just my name 😀
I’ve always felt that “Yours sincerely” was a little too formal, but I’ve never seen someone end an email with “Best Wishes” or “Regards” and thought they were doing the Southern version of “bless your heart.”
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Well, I’m a 66-year-old who has never thought too much about e-mail etiquette…I hope I’m not accidentally insulting anyone! 😳
I usually start my emails with “Hi [name of someone I know well]” or “Good morning/afternoon/evening [name of someone I don’t know very well]”.
And in all cases, I usually end my emails with a thank-you (if I have requested something), and then always a “have a great day/week.” (I figure everyone could use well wishes, but maybe that’s just annoying? I hope not!)
It’s hard, trying to figure out whether someone is being kind, angry, sarcastic, extra nice, etc. over email! 🤔
For greetings I will use the person’s name and if they have a title such as professor I will use that as well. I will also use Good (insert time of day here).
To sign off I will normally use Thanks or Thank you
my family is from England on both sides and we’ve been in new england since the early 1700s. I haven’t a clue how to help you, I struggle with emails as well. Never mind the greeting, my emails all look grumpy. if you want to see English shenanigans and word play, check out Very British Problems page on facebook. they have fantastic threads on this very thing, plus a host of other topics
Im a grad student for take this with a grain of salt, but I typically sign off emails with best or thanks, depending on if I’m asking someone for something. I also sometimes just write my name alone. I have a collaborator in the uk who uses cheers! to sign off his email and I’ve never taken offense to that. Good luck mod R!
I typically don’t use a salutation, just start the email. Have also just put the persons name with a colon.
Signing off have used “Cheers” for years and notice that others in my office have adopted that. If it is a first time email for me I will sign off with “Thank you”.
Also v.v.v.v.v.v. happy about GA announcement – did the pre-order right away!
😀 Another perfect display of cultural difference. Early in our relationship, I almost broke up with Mr Mod R for sending me a message with no greeting.
I was like “No. Request denied. Go back to your mother and learn manners, then come speak to me.” Who does he think he is 😀 , no hello, how are you? No bless yous for Giacomo.?
He’s never known peace since we’ve met, poor man lol
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!
If it’s informal, I greet them how I would if I was talking to them in person. If a professional email, I’d start with Hi, Hello, or Good Morning/Afternoon, depending on the tone I want to convey. If informal, my closing greeting is usually Thanks/Thank you or just my name, depending on who it is. If a professional email, I usually just put down “Regards.”
At my work we have a regards sub-culture.
Warmest regards : you’re not just my co worker but I know you, and I really want you to do this thing
Warm regards: neutral, it’s all good, here’s that info
Kind regards: used when aggravated and most likely includes something like “I’ve looped in so and so for awareness”
Among ourselves we joke about being really honest like “tepid regards” etc but we are a group that avoids conflict at all costs.
I am Gen X so most of my “regards” can be read with a certain flavor or sarcasm. 😎
Hey,
And
Thanks,
I always say:
Dear so and so,
Sincerely,
Alex
I studied Japanese in university, and we had a whole section on writing letters. There’s definitely a very proper way to write emails and letters in Japan. I filched a bit I liked from it, and now use it in all my emails.
It’s called commenting on the seasons. I really enjoy it, it gives a little spark to every email. Maybe it’s because I’m English, and work in a UK based company, but it really calls to the part of me destined to always talk about the weather.
[greeting of appropriate nature], [name]
I hope you’ve been enjoying a lovely spring / I trust this email finds you well and thriving in this gorgeous summer sunshine / Hope you’ve been keeping wrapped up and enjoying this cozy weather we’ve been having
OR you can stick it in the end,
Hope you enjoy a sunny weekend ahead / have a lovely time in this glorious spring weather / wrap up warm for the cold front headed your way
I cant get away with being nice and poetic like the Japanese, but I can toe the line.
Love this! Thank you for sharing. Might adopt.
That is so beautiful! Thank you!
I sympathise. Formally, the complimentary close for Dear Sir or Madam is ‘yours faithfully’, ‘yours sincerely’ is for Dear Mr.Mrs/Ms title of your choice. These were quite informal compared with ‘I am, sir, your obedient servant’, which I found on some old files when I joined the Civil Service in the 1960s. Here is Ireland, after independence we opted for a Gaelic address and close, ‘A Chara’, literally ‘O, Friend’, using the vocative case to address someone, and ‘is mise, le meas’, I am, with respect’ or ‘I remain, respectfully’.
Writing novels set during the Regency, I can be as elaborate as I like and enjoy tweaking this to mark an increase in intimacy, but personally in emails I go for the shortest possible close. honi soit qui mal au pense
I’m a native English speaker and cannot keep up with email etiquette like that either. I actually don’t even use anything to sign off other than my email signature. I’m not even sure how much of that actually matters anymore. So many people I email message me back without even saying hello. They just type their message and then I see a little blurb of “sent from my iPhone”.
I think it depends on the context, but polite yet upbeat never seems to cause a problem.
My default is “thank you and have a wonderful day!” and no one has expressed distaste (openly) that I’m aware of to date.
Oh, no. The babies can set their own rules for when they communicate with each other, but when they’re talking to older generations, in work settings, they do not get to set the rules for speaking to us. That’s like me, an English-speaker, telling a native Dutch-speaker how to speak Dutch. Nope.
They can get over it.
Same with texting. I’ve been doing it their entire lives, so I am not giving them the power to tell me I’m doing it wrong. They can clutch all the pearls they want about my complete sentences and ending punctuation.
(I’m a college professor who teaches business writing, if that wasn’t already apparent. 🤭)
Haha! Love your take on this. I might share it with the 20-somethings at my workplace. They all thought I was rude and stand-offish for the longest time until I bought a round of drinks and explained. Now they say I’m “old-fashioned” ::gasp!::
Dear Carrie,
Thank you for this. I feel as if you are one of my people! I have rarely, in a grammatical sense, felt so understood. “Clutch their pearls..” HA! I actually laughed aloud.
Thank you for your ongoing efforts,
Kim
Hear, hear! Brava! Full sentences and actual punctuation are balm to my weary heart.
Thank you for this.
Judith, a former English teacher
I like how you have expressed how I feel. I learned “proper” letter writing while learning operation of a manual typewriter. Things are more casual today, but I cannot undo habits of a lifetime to conform to a new generation’s intolerance of older models. Until this discussion I had no idea people were taking offence at what I see as politeness.
I see this vary by age at work, the younger folks are being much more creative lately. I always go with
Hi name,
…
Thanks,
when I email the veterinarian about dog drug refills, appointments, concerns, etc., I say “Hail Pet Warriors!” For everyone else, I’m 66 years old and in the same grammatical boat as you are. I’ll await the younger generation answers with anticipation.
I’m a millennial who doesn’t have time for this shit. People will get an email sign off of best, thanks (with a millennial exclamation mark because I can’t not), or sincerely then my info. Gen Z can have the extra, I don’t have the brain energy to overthink how a regular sign off could potentially read as rude anymore.
My favourite closing is “thank you kindly”. It’s middle-of-the-road polite/formal. A few people may assume you hail from the southern United States though.
As far as openers I use the KIS method (keep it simple):
1. Hello {Name}
2. Good {Morning / Afternoon / Evening}
Note I am an executive assistant and write both my work and personal email sin the same matter. So while not “cool”, will avoid misunderstandings or hurt feelings.
Grr grammatical errors, dictation was not my friend today. Should read:
Note: I am an executive assistant and write both my work and personal emails in the same manner. So while not “cool”, will avoid misunderstandings or hurt feelings.
This is how we do it at our municipality.
Good Morning/Afternoon (comma if I need to come off more professional, exclamation point if I know you or I need to soften the blow.)
For our sign off, we still use Regards. Or, Thank you/ have a great week or weekend/appreciate your help.
“Regards” is neutral for us. But oh no, if there’s a Kind Regards, it’s the passive aggressive equivalent of Go F*** Yourself/Die in a Fire/Punch Yourself in the Face.
Non English here, I always start with the time of the day has a greating, like good morning, if to someone informal I add the person name,
Like: Good morning, Mood R!
And just jump on the subject.
I usually end with “atentamente”that can translate to attentively, that is an informal and basic greating.
Corporate Speak
To an unknown person: Hello
To an unknown Group: Greetings!
To a known person : Hi
To a known Group of peers: Hey Guys, Happy
To a known group of Execs: Hello All
Otherwise it is a quick DM via Teams.
Non-Corp: Hey
Or just a quick text
I hate talking on the phone, stupid small talk BS. I also hate Voice Mail. 25+ years ago I started telling people that the indicator on the phone meant it was broken.
Often times I use my email as a sort of To Do list. Once that task is done I file it away…. Have you seen the HR cartoon on Netflix? I swear the Eastern Island head is me. Lololol
I keep it simple with a sincerely then my name. I’m in my 30s and mostly polite too.
Enjoy!
I’ve actually been reading a book about this (for work reasons), because I was also raised to be polite when writing, but there’s a level of formality that can read as very distancing that I wanted to avoid.
It’s called “Digital Body Language” and I’ve found it really interesting so far:
https://www.amazon.com/Digital-Body-Language-Connection-Distance/dp/1250246520
Oooh, starting this immediately!
I’ve been recommending Because Internet: Understanding the New Rules of Language ever since I read it, it’s seminal work, even if it’s getting long in the tooth now https://gretchenmcculloch.com/book/
Thank you for reminding me about “Because Internet”! That’s been on my TBR List forever, I keep forgetting to read it!
It *does* look awesome—and I definitely need to learn how to write a bit more casually. (Discord is especially challenging for this reason.)
I’m a millennial too, and I grew up in CA so you’d think I could do casual better, but I’m just a bit more formal. Probably all the years in Catholic school.
I often sign off with Cheers or Take care…openings depend on who and why I am emailing.
I feel all this in my soul because I def read too much into the way people write emails. Don’t get me started on people who end a sentence with an ellipsis.
If my audience is broad I usually go with “Good Morning/Afternoon Everyone” (It’s gender neutral and I say it in the voice of the professor from Futurama as I type) or just a hey/hi.
If I have a formal relationship you get “Thank you” and then my name/signature. If you are closer then you get a “Thanks, Erica”
I am boring but at least I’m not mean, which as an auditor is the goal.
I always start with Hello (person) and end with Thank you! whether it makes sense or not. I try to keep it simple and polite.
Then again I deal with a lot of churches and pastors, so hopefully there is a little grace if I’m ticking them off unintentionally (haha)
Thank You! 😉
When I have to reach out to people at work via e-mail, I usually say “Good morning. For my e-mail ending, I will say “If you have any questions, please let me know.” Then “Thanks , Marsha”.
As a native English speaker I never knew a greeting and signing off were so very important for nonnative speakers. Going overseas let me understand the protocol of greetings and closures were so very important.
My default sign off is
Thanks!
Regardless of the actual contents of the email. Thats If I bother to sign it at all
I mean, I’m gen x and we generally skip the passive in passive aggressive.
that being said, i worked for a large British company for years. my emails to anyone that i had not yet communicated with started with “dear m. *last name*” and ended with “warm regards, Ericka”
my current company is American and more casual, and I go with “hello.” I include first name if I’ve talked to them before and “team” if it’s going to more than one person. I close with “warm regards, Ericka” unless I hate them, in which case it’s “regards, Ericka.” after the first email, I usually sign off with “WR, EJS”
the idea that I’m being hostile or passive aggressive actually makes me laugh. your feelings about my emails are a you problem. 😀
“your feelings about my emails are a you problem.”
Repeating for emphasis!
I just say hello, or good morning etc.
I don’t use platitudes in the body of the email. I just communicate what I need to say and then end with my email signature with my name and office information. seems safer.
I send a lot of work emails. For internal emails:
Hi First name,
Work thing here e.g. Reaching out regarding z thing. Would it be possible for you to do x by y?
Best,
Ellabean
For a group of people:
Good morning, Mostseniorleader, secondmostsenior, thirdmost,
Work thing.
Best,
Ellabean
For external emails:
Hi Firstname,
Hope you are doing well!
Actual reason why I am reaching out and my request/action item.
Warmly,
Ellabean
If I don’t want to sign warmly, then I’ll use All my best
And if it’s personal–
Hi Firstname,
close friends:
xoxo,
E
family:
Love,
E
Spouse,
Love you!
My normal way of emailing is Dear X (formal/people I don’t know or don’t email regularly) or, Hi X (people I know/regularly email/ further down the email chain after the first dear X email). Sign off is usually Kind Regards (meant as a neutral sign off!), Thanks (informal and I’ve asked them to do something), Thanks in advance (passive aggressive, I need them to do something that is their job to do but they have a tendency not to do it, or not to do it in good time), or Cheers (I know them well and they’ve done something I appreciate).
My last 15 years in a casual, close-knit, stable group of co-workers led to a serious degradation of formality. So “Hi ___” at best, or just the name of the person being addressed, or nothing at all for an opening. “Thanks” or sometimes nothing at all for a closing. And yet we all somehow got along with each other, mostly.
In a culture where two positives can make a negative (“yeah, right”), sometimes the only winning move is not to play.
“Sometimes, the only winning move is not to play.” – “Joshua” the computer program, from “War Games” (1983)
I was trained first as a journalist then as a tech writer. Currently I work in a military setting manning a help desk, so I get a lot of questions and Help! type emails.
Depending on mood or rush, I will frequently respond to the query with no salutation and just get to the helpful parts. When I do use a salutation it’s just Title and Last name, i.e. SPC Jones, or Col Smith,
A common ending in military circles is Very Respectfully, which is often shortened to V/R.
In personal email I have used “Your servant,” or “Yours,” I probably picked that up from the musical 1776 because that’s how G. Washington signs all the letters read to the Continental Congress.
Hello!
{Insert request, email body content here}
Thanks,
Sign Off
Replies in an email thread on the same day do not have opening or closing salutations, but follow up emails the next day or longer absolutely do. Then it would be, Hello Again, or Hello Name, etc.
Since I work at a small, private university I have to email professors, deans, students and prospective students daily. How I address them will depend on how well I know them. A lot of professors I use their first names while others are always “Dr.” or “Prof.”. Students I typically address by their first name but that’s because we are trying to portray ourselves as a friendly, small (i.e. not a giant) university.
For a lot of my emails I will start with something like “I hope your ____ is going well.” But there are times that I dive straight into the purpose of the email if I know the person and I just need a quick reply back.
For closing I frequently use “Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns. I’ll be glad to help.”
Truthfully, for my personal emails a lot of the above gets left out and I just go with what I am needing. I hope if they know me that well they will understand I’m just trying to get info from them and we will talk more in depth another time.
We send a lot of copies of documents or forms to clients. Lots of times they don’t bother to look that they already have it. It is quicker to just ask me. If I am really getting ticked at them not even trying, I forward the old email with the doc and say “Here it is again” I know that is deliberately rude.
Well, I’m old, so I learned correspondence etiquette when dinosaurs still roamed the earth, and “correspondence” meant a letter written on paper (with a pen, never a pencil!) and sent via the post office.
These days, I start emails with either “Hi “, or “Hello ” depending on how well I know the person. I end them with “Thank you, ”
Is it correct? Damned if I know. But no one has complained yet!
Thank you, Mod R, for all you do for the BDH!
Always:
Formal. Dear Mod R,
Sincerely yours,
Valerie
Informal. Hi Mod R,
Sincerely,
Valerie
Good friends. Hiya Mod R! Or Hi Mod R,
Talk to you soon, or Have a great day,
Valerie
I was also taught to be very formal unless they were close friends of the family. PARTICULARLY older generations. We never called adults by their first names. I still don’t unless I am asked to, or they have become close friends.
I have Japanese members of my family (related by marriage) and I always bow to the elders. When greeting them or leaving their presence. Not many remain, but if you live to 102 years, you deserve the respect and formality.😊
I can’t wait. Maybe my favorite series of all times!
It kind of depends if it’s an email or letter. For emails, I resort to “Best -” (best what? who knows?) when generically signing off work emails. If I’m trying to insert a little personality or make them like me, I’ll sign off “Warmly,” which my assistant does and I liked so have adopted.
For professional letters, I’ll always sign off “Sincerely,” as I think that’s a little more formal (although still, Sincerely what?) It used to be “Sincerely yours,” but now 99.9% of folks would find that weird. (Obvs. I’m not theirs. Why would I say that?). So, I remain, sincere, in ambiguity.
As a software developer, I have a “not capable of social interactions” standard to uphold. People can be happy if I even replied to an email. It’s one of my most favorite things about my job <3 It's a very useful stereotype to uphold!
Sadly, my boss is also a friend of mine, and know that it's somewhat BS in my case. Hence I spend 20% of my time dealing with clients and business analysts instead of important things like when to use dependency injection properly, or trying not to strangle a coworker who can't seem to get it through his thick head that no, I will not pass a peer review that contains potential sql injection vulnerabilities. Parameterize your damn queries.
I think that can be my new email sign off.
"Parameterize your damn queries! (yes Dave, I mean you)"
There’s also the question of whether you start an introduction with a dash, comma, or colon. I’ll usually start emails with a dash (“Dear ModR – “) or (“ModR -“) depending on how informal I’m feeling. Letters get a colon or comma. My rule fo thumb there is that if it’s a business letter, I’ll typically use a colon (“Dear ModR:”). If it’s a personal letter, I’ll use a comma (“Dear ModR,”)
Sometimes, if I’m sending a letter to a government office, I’ll do the Dear Sir/Madam thing or just leave it off and dive into the text of my letter after the “Regarding” line.
Sorry Mod R, I was raised in England with the same text book – I think it originated with Pitman’s for those of us old enough to have a typing qualification.
Dear and Yours sincerely or Dear Sirs and Yours faithfully were the standard.
As with most English use of English you can read more than is stated. The most feared opener is always ‘I’m sorry …..’ there is a silent ‘you are a moron’ hidden between that phrase and the rest of the sentence.
Pick your industry norm and stick with it (my public sector one is Kind Regards), the optional hand signals don’t have to travel over the internet. 😀
Umm, I’m Gen X (end of, so also Xennial) and I still use “Sincerely” signing of on my work related emails.
I don’t care what Gen Z thinks it means. 😉
I’ve loosened up a bit for the start of a new email. I’ll skip the “Dear Sir/Madam” at the start of a work email (Greetings). I’ll use the recipient’s name instead to start the email. (Mabe a “Hi X” if it’s someone I’ve corresponded with before.) And on replies, I take my cue from their replies on if I keep using their name as a Greeting, or just skip a greeting and go directly into my reply.
At my company, it’s generally Hi X or Dear X depending on the power gap or if they are Japanese (where the company is based). Tough to expect everyone in a multinational company to keep up with American Gen Z norms so we go plain.
Sign offs are still Regards in its various forms. I go with my gut on anything other than plain Regards – as in “are they mad at me”, “am I mad at them”, are we both mad at someone else”….
For real life, pretty much the same for me. I’m basic as they come.
Greetings!
for people you don’t hate. For customer service, “To whom it may concern,”.
If your email was sincere, you can close with “Sincerely,” and if that person owns you (as in a close parent or spouse) “Sincerely yours,”
Sincerely,
Jim K.
Don’t ask me, Austria is still using Kind Regards. At least on professional emails. For personal ones, I often don’t sign off at all. I had no idea this was passive aggressive, although as a culture I guess it makes sense. Is it passive aggressive when everyone is using it?
I work in accounting, so I can get away with being formal in emails and chat. So I usually just start with “Good morning / afternoon [name]” or just “Hi [name]” after frequent communication, and end with “Regards” or use “Thanks” if I made a request in the email.
Also, not recommending that you use these regularly, but I found this list hilarious: https://www.buzzfeed.com/meganeliscomb/funny-email-sign-offs. I may have to start using #38 with certain people.
Hey! Kiri from Maine—a people nearly as stoic and mistrustful as Soviets of ancient days—we’re also direct and give no ducks most of the time. We spend a lot of home in the Great Outdoors and don’t hold a lotta truck with fads, trends, city people, or high heels. So when I say I’ve always done fine in email with Hello/Dear/To Whom it May Concern, and end with Thanks, Sincerely, or take care, take it as a possibly regional thing. Oh, I might use Salutations if I wanna get Charlotte’s Web fancy. Likely this doesn’t help, but hopefully wins a couple points for funny. 😂🤣
I’m a bit old fashioned, so these won’t be the most up to date:
Opening:
“Hi-” or “Mr-“/”Ms-“/”Mx-”
Closing:
“With appreciation”
“Thanks” or
“Yours”
hello, good morning/afternoon & thank you or thanks
The only emails I write anymore are for work & I try to keep it simple.
Well, I am American English which is different from UK English. I’m 67 years old and I tend to be blunt. So, before I retired, if I had to email a request a second time, you did read me “per my previous email” or, my personal favorite “per our conversation” I, usually started the email with your first name if I knew you or Mr. Ms. So and So if I didn’t. My emails tended to end with, “Thanking you in advance,” or just “Sincerely” and my name. I’m probably not the one you want to take direction from! Good Luck!
What?! I just learned something new about email sign offs. Never knew there were hidden meanings. Or that there was such a generational difference.
Probably because I work a government job, I can still be pretty formal. I’m a millennial but I started this career working alongside a lot of boomers. A lot of my mentors/coworkers have retired or are close to retirement. I normally sign off work emails with “thanks.” For external work correspondence, I tend to use “regards” or “sincerely.” Now I’m wondering how I come across to the newbies I train….0_0
I do technical support for engineers. We’re a pretty straightforward bunch, and consistency is important. I start emails with “Hello [name],” or if I know the person “Hi [name],”. I end every email with “Best Regards”. No matter what I put in the body of the email, my start and end are always the same. Consistency to prove how professional I am. lol
Hm. My greetings and sign offs are:
Hello, Hi, greetings, (nothing)
Nice to meet you, thank you, thanks, warmly, best wishes, cheers, see you soon
When signing off I will often try to make it something topical: have a good weekend, the sunshine is lovely, have a good trip, etc.
I use “sincerely” or “yours truly” when submitting complaints.
I’m a little chameleon and change what I use in response to how people address me in their emails. Different generations and fields do it differently.