ILONA ANDREWS

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Getting Distracted

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Happy anniversary!

Curran:  Hey, how is the shopping going?

Kate:  I found really good tomatoes.

Curran:   Oh good.  Out of curiosity, what kind of monster looks like a rabid wolf that stands on hind legs?  About eight feet tall, with big scaly bat wings?

Kate:   Bear claws?  Red eyes?  Glows blue?

Curran: Yes, that’s the one.

Kate: It’s a kludde out of Belgium. Cape Fear River has been making stagnant pools all over the place after the last storm. It probably spawned in one of those. Why?

Curran:  No reason.

Kate: Curran, is there a kludde in our yard?

Curran: Seems that way.  So what else did you get besides tomatoes?

Kate:  Where is our son?

Curran: Talking to the kludde.

Kate: What is it saying?

Curran: Something about ripping out Conlan’s heart and eating it.

Kate: Okay, and what is Conlan saying?

Curran: He is asking it why that specific threat.  Ripping the heart out requires breaking the ribs and according to our son, it’s “laborious” while ripping out the throat is faster, easier, and more efficient.  He seems genuinely curious, and the kludde is stumped.

Kate: Why me?

Curran: I’m watching them from the wall. I can jump down there in half a second.

Kate: If you do, don’t rip its head off…

Curran: Too late.  Conlan just did.

Kate: Okay, it’s going to split into seven copies of itself.  Look for the one that’s slightly brighter than the other.

Curran:   By brighter you mean?

Kate:   More saturated.

Curran: …

Kate:  What’s going on? 

Curran:  He made blood claws, ripped out all of their throats, and now he is lecturing the corpses.

Kate: I think we should limit his visits to his grandfather.  His tendency to orate is clearly rubbing off on Conlan, and it’s too dangerous. Something could attack him, and he wouldn’t notice it until it’s too late.

Curran: He is nicely distracted by the sound of his own voice.

Kate: Are you going to jump down and show him the error of his ways?

Curran: Yep.

Kate: Have fun.  Take pics if you can.

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Comments

  2. Off topic: I started re-reading “Clean Sweep” and feel like an idiot after realizing George & Jack make their first appearance to Dina & Sean in the VERY FIRST book. I sooo missed it before, but am supremely tickled that they are there and how they are there. I won’t be specific, just in case I am not the only one who missed them. Don’t want to spoil it.

    • ???? I will always remember the happy squeal I let out when I first realised who it is.

      • Its funny b/c in “Sweep in Peace” it is driving Dina crazy trying to figure out where she has seen the two before. Ha, ha.????

  6. Oh God, how i missed the ‘family’ so much..hope there’ll be short stories on conlan adventure soon..

  12. ? … ! o k . . . there was this thing ,saying, picture, commercial, about minds and waste and being terrible …

    Conlan is Curran’s greatest show, I’m so glad Kate found her zen

  15. Oh honestly you two!
    CONFESS! You go squirreling through the wild forests of weird legendary beastie research, and you trip over something ….horrible, smells like sexually active socks
    Hmmm.
    Doesn’t fit in current book
    [Grabs post-it]
    save it for later
    Speaking of postIts…what color are yours this week?

  17. Kate and Curran are my comfort couple.. surprising with all the violence and gore but they make my soul happy

  19. Trop heureuse d’avoir de leurs nouvelles ! Merci pour ce petit texte. Hâte de retrouver la suite de Julie ainsi que celle d’Hugue

  29. this makes me happy sad. happy about the snippet. sad that i have to wait 15yrs for another. :~(

  30. Ahaha ???? Just too awesome! My oldest kid tends to lecture people when setting them down, too. Watching a 5 yr old girl put someone in a hold your husband swears he DID NOT teach her while lecturing on the evils of bullying with academic vocabulary you DID teach her is a priceless experience.

  35. Okay! Here’s the very reason I said, in comments or on Facebook, can’t remember, that you had me from the go. Even itty bitty shorts like this one grab you when you read them. I’ve read so many books I get a headache when people ask me how many, and you stand out by continually putting out good work. Thank you from the bottom of a jaded readers heart!

  38. Congrats on 15 years of Kate & Curran’s world. It’s really nice to see how they are progressing as parents. Nothing much out of the ordinary. Thanks !!!

  40. It would be so wonderful to have a Conlon and Friends book come out. We got a taste of what it might be like in Blood Heir. Adolescent shapeshifters and related monsters. They will have poor choices and will need adult supervision and intervention. They will be heroes and heroines in spite of themselves. We would all love such a series of books!

    • Actually this is a continuation of the above comment: What if Conlon and a couple of his friends go camping with Conlon’s parents by a lake / river. Something happens and the kids get separated from the parents. They then have to face the natural and unnatural dangers of the forest before reuniting with the adults by the end of the story.

  45. I love the Daniels-Lennart family, and I’m greedy….younger sibling in the works (running away giggling).

    Peace,

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