ILONA ANDREWS

#1 New York Times Bestselling Author

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New Accessibility Plugin

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We switched to a different accessibility plugin for you. Please note the icon in the top left corner. If you need help reading our site, it contain’s a number of options.

Please let us know if there are any issues.

Also, those of you who have found the thing, please don’t tell other people about the thing, because we are still nailing the layout down. The rest of you, please don’t look for the thing.

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Comments

  2. “The rest of you, please don’t look for the thing.”

    Is this your first time meeting humans?????

  3. You have given us a new unfinished toy… to play or not to play. Interesting thing to ponder on a lazy Saturday.

    • @Random you have more willpower than I.
      Look but do not touch is nearly in the same category as “only one last chapter”.

    • @Random

      You have more willpower than I.

      Look but do not touch is in the same category with “only one more chapter”

    • you have more willpower than I.

      Look but do not touch is in the same category as “only one more chapter”.

    • I’d count this as the white hat hacker approach.

      (Maybe even “Or don’t touch it in an obvious or destructive way?” Possibly “Don’t touch it unless it’s really funny?” Standards are ill defined. I went into research.)

  6. Don’t look for the thing. Don’t look for the thing. Don’t look for the thing.

    I wanna look for the thing!!!!!!!!!!! Wahhhh

  7. Sorry – what has been seen cannot be unseen.
    But I will not touch.
    No! No touch! Bad!

    Will you let us know when you are through tweaking, please?
    If you hadn’t said anything, the vast majority of us would have ignored the “thing” and never bothered it. Now we all want to know aaaall about it.

    Yes, ma’am. Not touching…

  8. The THING. Sounds like a classic horror movie. There was The Thing (1951, 1982 & 2011), The Thing from Another World (1951) and Zontar the Thing from Venus (1966)
    But I won’t go searching for your Thing 🙂

  13. Ok, I will not look for the “thing”. However, you do know that the Horde may look for the thing we’re not suppose to look for. 😉

    I think I’ll look for good movies to watch so I don’t have to look for the thing on here. 🙂

  14. Lol. My interest is peeked about the thing but I won’t look for it! Too busy with a daredevil toddler anyways. I’m sneaking a moment with my phone while he is distracted with something. Good luck getting everything how you want it!

  17. The Thing sounds like something that Dina would fuss over obtaining for a special guest at Gertrude Hunt.

    I am suddenly obssessed with the concept of The Thing…and suddenly remembering Raphael’s gift to Andrea. Is THAT the Thing???

  18. I noticed that in my phone, I have to set the options again when I go to another page, although it seems to remember them when I return to a page. Would it be easier for users if the website assumed the options should be applied to all the pages?

    I don’t need any of them. I just like to test things.

  20. I didn’t touch it!! But, but…..sigh…House Andrews says no touch…..sigh….I will go make more Christmas candy instead.

  21. I’m reading this on a smartphone… the “thing that shall not be seen” is basically doing a booty dance in a fifth of my screen, lol. Sorry… I swear I didn’t look for it! It glomped me I swear! Lololololol!

  23. Ohhhhh that’s just deep seated conflict. If it were anybody other than y’all asking please I would snort and go hunting but it’s you…. and ughhhhhhh. I wanna so bad. And I can’t. Or shouldn’t. Or whatever. I’m going to go distract myself w something shiny. Must. Not. Hunt.

  24. I just want to say that everything you do is so beautiful, pretty and magical! You make me smile with the smallest of things. Have a great weekend, and hollydays and don’t work too hard and be blessed!

  26. Found the thing. All parts worked just right. Congrats! Thanks for continuing to try to make things better for us!

  28. Ok, I went looking, I found it. I only did it to test the accessibility button. Really, uh huh, yup, I’m sticking to my story. Everything worked.

  36. Thank you for an impromptu thing search. It was both cheering and distracting.

    (…which I needed. I just found out that my baby brother* died very unexpectedly.

    * Yes, the hate vlogger who had made threats against me and accused our older half sister of murdering our father** earlier this year. It’s complicated. We were really close when we were younger. I mean, eesh, he was 37.
    ** I suppose you could make this stuff up, but who would want to?)

    • I am so sorry to hear about your brother. We always wish things could have been better or at least could have more time to change things. Family drama happens …in every family.

      • Thank you.

        This served as impetus for me to do what I’d been thinking about since both our fathers died in the last year, and reach out to the surviving cousin who also went to the same go to college out of middle school program I did. We had a really lovely conversation, and will be staying in touch, and I might be visiting with his younger brother if I make it to Portugal this summer. So, earlier episodes of family drama get to fade, anyway. (They were told not to speak to me after I took my father to court… though when we were all in the same city, we did stay in touch.)

    • I’m sorry for your loss, even though complicated it is still hard, my thoughts are with you and the rest of your family.

      • Thank you. I am grateful once again for the incredible kith network… and really, for many of our blood in our generation as well. (Just contacted a dear friend, who promised to stand next to my sister and look imposing, so if she wants to wear black and interact with absolutely no one – as is the right of a first degree relative at a funeral, damn it – she can.* Heck, we can get her an honor guard if that’s what she wants.

        …they’re a lot closer in age and there was a bunch of stuff they went through together after I left when I was fifteen. It’s hitting her pretty hard. She’s also just a much nicer person than I am, and it’s her first sibling death, while it’s my third. Gods, my family.)

        * There’s a history of our mother going on extended tirades and blaming my sister for random things. I mean, a) not with a non-family audience and b) it’s not like I haven’t been the heavy before, but it’s not stress she needs.

    • I am so sorry. We tend to remember the baby brother part, not the hate vlogger part, when something like this happens. Please take care of yourself.

      • I wish I had access to more of his art from his elementary years and adolescence. He did a stop motion movie on the life of Mohammed when he was maybe twelve that was pretty amazing. (Including some troll figures filling out the armies in some pretty epic battle scenes, and visitation scenes that were pretty horror inspired…) He drew a bunch of books in elementary school that were pretty darkly hilarious.

        (I was less taken by his later music, but his childhood best friend, who managed to remain on good terms with him until just a few years ago, loves it and can represent.) I just dropped him a note about maybe us putting together some kind of a wake.

      • Thank you. I was venting here probably more than I should, while we were trying to reach the people who needed to be told before any kind of announcement was made. Now things are coming together, which is mostly good, though it’s super fun explaining to my mother that my sister and I put our feet down on inviting actual fascists to the memorial service…

  38. Thanks for the accessibility tool. There are some things there that are helpful. I wish other web sites had them.

  39. Accessibility tools are working quite well for me in Safari on my iPad, and are very much appreciated.

  40. I can’t verify the effectiveness of the accessibility tool, but cool that it’s there.

    My family has a long tradition of snooping during December to try and figure out what our gifts will be. Most of the fun is in trying to get caught but making it seem like you were trying not to get caught. Like, you have to wait until Mom ISN’T in the room before you shake the wrapped gifts under the tree, but then you have to make JUST enough noise to tip her off so she comes back in and indignantly chases you away from the tree.

    …in other words, I found the Thing.

  41. I can see the thing. Am guilty of a twitching finger, because it’s soooo tempting, but did NOT touch the thing! ????
    As somebody else said so eloquently above ..” you bring joy to my life ” ????

  42. I love the fact that the new accessibility tool has enough options for you to find one that fits your part needs. Only last week I snarled at (and then apologised to) one of our developers that “the website might be WCACG co pliant but my vision problems aren’t!

  43. Veni, vidi, vici – I’m here, I see it, ???? and because you said, “Please,” I’m resisting it…so far. ????

  44. Neurodiversity is swell. How very cool to have so many accessibility options. I played with them, and some made my brain hurt, but if it makes the site better for another person, cool! I ended up resetting it all & it made it all better for my brain. Cool thing to mess with!

  47. Ok, now I didn’t know there was a thing, but since you’ve mentioned it, I really want to know what the thing is. OMG it’s killing me not knowing.

  49. Thing is, some things make us soooo curious, we want to do something about it. Is there anything to be done? No, to honor your wishes, I promise not to do a thing.

  50. THE THING??!!!!!!????

    (Head explodes)

    Ilona has mastered the art of subtle trolling. And reverse psychology.

  53. OK. Click on SEARCH, it lets me type a parameter. But the symbol of whatever it is to the left of the word “search” does nothing. Am I using the wrong browser and it doesn’t work in Firefox? What’s is supposed to do? What accessibility tools is it supposed to bring to me? AUGH! FOMO slams me!

    But wait! The home page brings me to the blog. I can read it. What am I missing out on? Calm returns. ahhhh

  54. Whatever does “F3 [over] 75” stand for? At least, that’s what the tiny icon in the top left looks like when I use my magnifier!

    I did just click on the word Menu in the top right for the first time – BIG WORDS! 🙂

    In recent years, my vision’s been worsening (cataracts, anyone?), and I’ve been delighted to discover some of the accessibility goodies included in Windows 10 (if Win7 had them, I never found them!). My favorite is the magnifying glass: great for reading that endless fine print in end user license agreements!

    Thank you for thinking of us!

    • Windows has a ton of highly effective accessibility tools that are little known and understood. Magnifier has been around since Windows 98. There is a read-aloud option for those who cannot see cannot see at all. It is a very robotic voice but if you need it, you have it as well as rudimentary talk-to-text and voice commands. Plus o much more.

      But few know about these features because Windows has never really talked them.

  57. It’s not working for me. There is a new white square in the top left corner, next to a search bar, but it doesn’t do anything. I’m using chrome canary (or something like this, the one with the golden icon).

    • Same here. There’s nothing there at all for my iPad or iPhone. My windows work computer shows a square, but nothing happens if you click on it. I am using Chrome at work.

      Thanks. Nina

  58. I still have projects on the needles, those are the only THINGS that rate my concern. One has finally made it to the blocking stage. Have a grand weekend!!

  61. I looked for the thing. I didn’t find the thing. I’m sad because I have no patience to wait for the thing to be revealed…

  64. I found a thing without looking for it and it made my day. Looking foreward. Thank you so much for giving me hope 🙂

  65. The accessibility icon was here when I looked on the 14th, but it’s gone today. Maybe you took it down, but on the off chance that you weren’t aware, I thought I’d let you know. I’m using an (older) Android phone with Internet Explorer. I just switched over to the Chrome browser and it didn’t appear there either.

  66. Since you say not to look for the thing, I return to the words of one of the Great Sages:
    “I see nothing. NOTHING!”

  67. I’m so excited that I’m doing a re-read of the things that came before the thing. Hoping for more info soon!????❤️????

  68. I think by asking any human being, not to go looking for a “thing” will catalyse them into looking for the “thing”, sorry, but it did for me. Now pulling a pet lip.

  69. Ilona…y’all are wrong for that, and you know it!!!! Lol!!!! Just to put my two cents in, I’m using voiceover on iPhone and everything seems to be in working order.

  71. I’ve been looking for a way to increase accessibility on my workplace websites. Is this a WordPress plugin? If so, would you be willing to share its name?

    Thanks!

  74. I found it and like the content, but I am viewing on an android phone usually. Depending on formatting, the start of some of the words are cut off. I did solve this by using landscape mode instead of portrait. On PC it works fine.

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