This morning’s news item from BBC: York student uses AI chatbot to get parking fine revoked.
Final Option
Written in the last 45 minutes for your enjoyment
Nothing depressed Tamara more than looking at her bank account.
It wasn’t that she bought extravagant things. There were no splurges on the latest designer handbags with integrated wallets and inventory tracker or the trendy, spider-web thin body contour jewelry, 3d printed with the patented liquid gold alloy. No, all of her purchases were reasonably cheap. $59.08 at Bed, Bath, and Bodyworks. They had a buy 3, get 3 free sale on fragrance mist, and it was too good to pass up. $6 at Starbucks two days ago. In her defense, it had been a very hard Monday, and a Frappuccino made it bearable. $21 on cat litter. Not an optional purchase…
Tamara sighed. She was 27 years old. Her high school dreams of making crazy money and laughing all the way to the bank while driving a white convertible with her hair blowing in the wind had met the cold, hard wall of reality and splattered against it long ago. Now she just wanted to make her ends meet. She loved her job. It just… didn’t pay much and a better paying job hadn’t materialized. She’d been looking.
Her checking account was down to $276. Nine days till payday and the electric bill was still due. There was no way. Even if she ate only ramen and sadness till the end of the month, there was no way.
She wouldn’t borrow money from her parents again. They would give it to her, no questions asked, and they wouldn’t even expect repayment, but the guilt would be too much. It was enough that they footed the bill for her medical insurance and allowed her to use the family AI.
Speaking of AI…
“Chadwick, how is it going with that parking fine?”
Chadwick’s cultured voice issued from the wall speakers, “I’ve failed to succeed.”
“What? Why? It worked the first two times.”
“The AMPA AI must’ve received a major upgrade.”
The Austin Municipal Parking Authority was a menace to society. Its drones were 3rd generation junk, and they routinely misread the parking permit stickers.
“But I have the permit. I have the right to park in that lot.”
“I’ve pointed that out. The AMPA insists that it’s entitled to $50”
Tamara rubbed her temples. “What have you tried?”
A mural on her wall blinked, turning into a screen. A list appeared.
“In the 22 hours 43 minutes and 12 seconds since receiving the assignment, I have submitted 1,734 appeals and received 1,734 denials. Topics covered: existence of the permit, placement of the permit, visibility of the permit, AMPA’s equipment failure, AMPA’s responsibility to maintain equipment standards, limits of a citizen’s personal responsibility to compensate for AMPA’s failure, citizen’s tax burden…”
“The cliffs notes, please.”
“In summary, the AMPA maintains that since you are aware its drones have difficulty scanning your permit due to the sun glare, it is your responsibility to park in a way that reduces that glare.”
“How? There is no shade in that lot. It’s a parking lot! I’m required to park in that parking lot.”
“It will not budge.”
Tamara shut her eyes.
“There is one last option you can try,” Chadwick advised.
“No. I don’t want to. I don’t want to, I don’t want to, I don’t want to… Anything but that.”
The AI waited, quiet.
$50.
Tamara sighed. “Fine. Do it.”
A quiet beep echoed through her apartment.
“You have reached the Austin Municipal Parking Authority,” a female voice announced. “Please listen carefully to our menu because our options have changed. To apply for a permit, press or say 1. To…”
Tamara steeled herself and took a deep breath. “REPRESENTATIVE!”
I lived in Atlanta for 8 weeks while my daughter received medical treatment. I have a car with a toll pass from another state that Georgia says works with their toll system. I received a ticket for over $275 dollars for “toll violations” during those 8 weeks. The irony was the same days I would receive a citation for a violation I would also see a charge to my toll pass for another road or section of the highway, so sometimes their system was registering me and sometimes it was not. I appealed this, and the response was, “your pass did not match the car that was using it some of the time so you owe us the money”. I only brought one car, with a mounted toll pass. And FYI, to save others time, the phone line for Georgia’s toll people is never actually answered. I would know.
I paid the fines. Not worth the hassle. But I am older and less broke than Tamara.
Lol. I feel this at multiple levels, in my bones being one of them. The pricing details are well done placing us in approximate time. Not too far in the future.
That was so very, very fun to read, and that “ramen and sadness” line was fantastic! Keep up the good work, guys.
OMG! I am SO with her!!
HAH!!!LMAO! I know the feeling well.
“ate only ramen and sadness till the end of the month”, lol
And…you just reminded me that I have to pay my phone bill via the automated system. Because a service representative screwed up automatic bill pay.
That was awesome. The way you guys write is off the charts. I want to read me and I’m feeling where’s the rest!
HAHAHAHA!!!!!
My husband died a couple of months ago, and I have been calling all kinds of people. The things I have to talk about don’t fit into the regular call tree menu, so I have been getting to a representative quickly and people are very helpful and sympathetic. I have 2 calls to make this coming week, and I have been dreading them and putting them off. I never like making calls, it just has to be done.
Jane
I’m so sorry for your loss,Jane. I hope all the troublesome calls finish soon.
I am so sorry that your husband passed. My husband did a few years ago. I just wanted to share that keeping a note book and writing down everything. Including who you spoke with, time, date, and short description. It sounds like a pain but, I have a mental fog around the year after my husband died and the notebook helped. I am sorry that you have to go through this, try to be kind to yourself and just remember to breathe.
I’m so sorry to hear about your husband and agree that a phone log is hugely helpful at times like that.
My go to is to say REPRESENTATIVE, but now to think I can say HUMAN is a score!
My trick for when I get to a person is to say in a curious voice, I have a mystery I hope you can help me with. It helps save my attitude and has gotten through difficult times with different companies, including Social Security.
I am also one of those who is yelling REPRESENTATIVE at the top of my lungs! I do try very hard to be kind the representative I finally do reach, but I would be so much less angry if I could actually reach one on the phone quickly! Longest wait time to date – Social Security office in Houston – 120 minutes. Just to make an appointment.
One other pet peeve at work is staying on hold with IT for ages only to be told the problem is a “known issue”. Don’t do that so much any more, since retirement kicked in. So the 120 minute social security hold was worth it! ????
Yes! You hit the nail on the head with this one. Love it!
???????????? so relatable
Laughing out loud here. And, here’s one for you — I actually found a message, in an AI bot voice, on my landline phone: “Sorry, you did not reveal yourself to be human. Good bye.”
I’m keeping that phone message forever!!! Smiles, hope your wkend is fabulous.
I was the executor for a deceased relative. They had an online brokerage account. Their 800 number had no option for reporting the death of an account holder. I went through a long phone tree of other options until it eventually connected me with a human. Tedious but eventually successful.
I really liked that representative was an option in your story.
I also spent 6 hours on the phone trying to sort out a medical billing issue. Company Insurance Rep was in one state, our factory was in another and the hospital billing department was in a third state. Turned out the billing clerk was submitting it to her states insurance because she thought they would send it to my states insurance office. Lucky for me corporate had someone with the clout to untangle this.
Would really love to know how the conversation with the Representative turned out.
lovely short <3
Real life! LOL
My very FIRST fiction referencing AI in the actual age of AI. Fun! You always remember your first 🙂
No everyone wants to know where this story goes!
I just read on Jeanine Frost’s blog that she will be doing a Zoom with Ilona and Gordon. Did I miss the announcement here?
Hey Cathy,
No, we didn’t announce it here yet, we usually wait until closer to the date so people don’t sign up and forget ????.
It will be on the 22nd of April, as an Ashland Library event.
FORGET??
That’s what calendars are for. I went ahead and signed up via Jeaniene’s blog so I could be sure to get a spot.
So good! Thank you.
Haha ha. Nothing worse than the dreaded “talking to a real person who also won’t help but you do it anyway even though it costs you hours on the phone as a last ditch effort to fix something simple”. As an introvert I’d really rather not.
Where is the rest!!?? LOL I like it but of course I almost always like/love what you write. Hope you are well & that life is going great. Just had a difference of opinion with my brother about money…..WHY is family like this about money??!! I will not ever do this again. Did a favor for my brother and get NAILED with “why did this cost so much?!! UGH!!
I feel Tamara’s pain. Got hit with a cleaning charge when I moved out of my grad school apartment. The one I had meticulously cleaned, vacuumed, and walked through with a representative of the company before moving out. (The representative said it looked fine, but was strangely non-committal about whether there would be charges. That should have been my first clue.)
The fee was only about $50, but my only job at the time was substitute teaching, so that was about half a day’s wages right there (before tax and provided I was even called upon to work; never guaranteed when subbing). So I fought it.
Stage one was in-person infiltration of the leasing office. It was in another state and they probably expected to never see me again. Joke’s on them, because I was scheduled to return for a friend’s wedding which happened to coincide nicely with receiving their demand for non-specific cleaning charges. I politely explained the problem to the woman in the office and showed pictures I had taken upon moving in of the paint splatters on the edge of the carpet. (Thought my Mom had been watching too much Judge Judy when she told me to do that, but she was right.)
The woman was persuaded and agreed the cleaning charges should be removed. One small snag: the apartment complex was owned by one of those red-tape-loving mega-corporations. Long story short, she could remove the charge, but it would involve a several day process of appealing corporate. Well, I can’t exactly argue with that. Can you at least sign something for me to that effect so I have a record of this interaction? Yes, she could. It was a good thing, too.
I got the second notice in the mail about a month later. Same undeserved cleaning charge, now with added ominous portents about lateness and the state of my credit. But I am only semi-employed and highly motivated, so I plunge into the depths of the internet and surface with an email address. I attach a politely worded inquiry explaining the situation with the signed document for added verisimilitude and think no more of the matter.
That is, until I receive the third notice about a month later. This time, I dig deeper into my research until I come up with a phone number. The usual dance through preset options until I get to the one about a person ensues (yes, automated system, despite your numerous qualifications, only a person will do), with the added twist that none are currently available nor is there a hold option. Won’t you please leave a message? It’s that or hang up empty-handed, so of course I do. It ends with the phrase “would like this taken care of TODAY.”
“Today” passed without a call back, but I must have finally gotten someone’s attention, because a real live person called me back “tomorrow.” We chatted, they confirmed receipt of my email, and the charge was finally, FINALLY removed.
I would LOVE to have an AI to handle those things instead.
Have Austin and San Antonio grown together yet? Is there a crazy village of new pagan beer drinking Germans who hate technology in the center? Is it crazy but is there actually light rail or something between Laredo and DFW?
There are so many cool things to be done in future or semi future TX. I get the feeling this is kinda a quick thing that won’t show up again, but Sci-Fi Texas is my favorite Texas.
Hi, Mod R!
Completely off-topic but I remember Ilona posted an awesome commercial that seemed like a D&D movie and ended up being something to sell a car. Does House Andrews have any plans to watch the new Dungeons and Dragons movie?
Hehe, I’ve been meaning to ask them too, the trailers look so funny! 🙂
Pop Culture Happy Hour had a very positive review from most of their podcast panel. I hope it streams somewhere soon.
The new D&D movie is a great one for the matinee price. It was way better then I thought it would be.
I laughed. Having just tried to get UPS to reimburse me for packages they lost, tried filing online only to get a “you can’t do that!” message, and dealt with their phone menu numerous times, been rerouted back to start numerous times, heard multiple warnings that a human won’t be able to help me, and finally getting a human who was able to at least file the complaint, but didn’t know as much as the computer, I can only say that mega corps have taken customer service to a new low.
I was JUST looking for this post to add the article about the woman getting her parking ticket cleared by a ChatBot!
This has all the feels. I spent the better part of my day on Sat. talking to no less than 7 airlines’ representatives after one leg of a multilevel trip on 2 different airlines got cancelled!
This is why Bud Light won the Super Bowl this year.
That was amusing, validating and disheartening bc omg, we have AI that advanced and she still…. *gasps* has to talk to a representative *gags*and*dies*
God, I hate having to call and talk to people!!!! Uuuuggggghhhhhhh