
“So House Andrews are on tour and Mod R is ‘in charge’. Pah. As if we need a babysitter. When did we ever get in trouble?”
“I have the alphabetized list here somewhere…”
“All right, so we’ve occasionally been in the wrong place at the wrong time. No one can link it back to us.”
“Mod R is cool anyway. She supports Horde rights.”
“And more importantly, she comes up with defenses for Horde wrongs. Which never happened.”
“Nice save.”
“Focus! What’s the situation?”
“Only four sleeps until This Kingdom Will Not Kill Me. Tuesday, we ride at dawn!”
“Um, I can’t actually ride at dawn. I couldn’t take time off work, sorry.”
“We ride at lunch break!”
“That works, thanks.”
“FOR MAGGIE! She’s one of us, one of us, one of us!”
“Imagine, dropped into her own favourite story… historically, we’ve dealt with that very well.”
“Have we, though?”
“Well, we’ve done Nav.”
“Eh. More like Nav did us.”
“The point is: CASTLES! Politics. Assassins. Questionable decisions. Emotional compromise. That’s our natural habitat.”
“Maggie’s adventures are a trilogy, Ilona confirmed it. Seems unsafe to me. That means w*iting for two sequels.”
“Dollar for the swear jar, we’ve talked about this. It’s not like House Andrews even do actual cliffhangers. Cliff-leaners, at most.”
“But with no one coming to save us…”
“Think about it. That means no one’s coming to stop us, either.”
“Ooooh. Game changer! So we can do anything.”
“Even better, my friend. We can do everything.”
Mod R: “Okay, let’s remember fluffiness … is that Andrea’s crossbow?!”
“It’s fine, I’m practically an honorary bouda.”
Mod R: “No weapons during Horde strategy! It’s Ferret Safety 101, people. We are regrouping, we are being chalant, we are—”
“Barsa?”
Mod R: “Resting. You need your strength.”
“Can we get a bedtime story? We’ll lie down and pretend to nap.”
Mod R: “Once upon a time, in the great world of readers, there lived a Horde…”
“Not a nasty, pillaging Horde!”
“The best Horde.”
Mod R: “…and they were given a book, for them and for all readers who have ever wished to get lost in a story…”
“And then, we made it into a bestseller?”
Mod R: “And then, we made it into a bestseller indeed. And we devoured dushegubilly ever after.”
“Read it again, Mod R?”


I pledge my allegiance to IA the Horde forever!!
*can’t stop laughing*
Should we reconsider getting help from Chernobog?
…I’m just suggesting!
If he offers I’m not sure saying no is an option…
For the Horde!
Thanks for the bedtimestory – although I read it in the morning, so technically I think I need another one?
*big dreamy eyes*
When Maggie drops in my kindle it is only one more day until a vacation, so I’m going to be p*tient and wait for some hours to read in peace and quiet – or maybe just finish the book in peace and quiet?
oh Yay! I loved that story
Mod R You are the best!! Thank you for shortening the w*it with funny posts ❤️ we love you!
Chalantly waiting . . .
I can’t ride at dawn on Tuesday, but I did take Friday off specifically to read Maggie 😁
Wonderful Can’t wait. I will be devouring Maggie Tuesday morning.
This is the best bedtime story ever!
Many thanks to ModR, our glorious and gracious Overlords & the company of the Horde 😉😘❤️
OOOH new mugs – ‘MEMBER OF THE MOST GRACIOUS & GLORIOUS COMPANY OF THE HORDE’
‘CHAMPION OF THE HORDE’
‘KNIGHT OF THE HORDE’
‘DEFENDER OF THE HORDE’
… 😉😘❤️
Thanks, ModR. Brilliant in your own right!
And thank you for the countdown clock. The US is already into summer time. Europe is „springing forward“ an hour tomorrow. As far as I can calculate with all the moving variables, I‘ll be saddled up and mounted on Tuesday, about an hour before dawn, ready to charge the moment that ebook drops!
Now, please excuse me. I just reread the 2024 FrInnterview ModR linked in the comments above and I must now go and bake cookies.
Baking cookies, excellent prep activity. Plus you’ll have cookies to sustain u as u read. I’m w*iting for Pursuit of Jade’s last episode to drop Monday, and I really should start packing now so I don’t have to do it while reading.
What r y’all doing to prepare? What food laid in, etc?
3 sleeps now!
*practices slow breathing* Stay calm, stay calm…
Loved it!!
ModR, you are the bomb diggity! Where would we be without you? We do need a live reading of the bedtime story, though 🙂
Will ‘Maggie 1’ be published as ebook for German readers, amazon.de or Kobo?
Please confirm (a woman can hope).
Greatings from Germany
Sincerely yours
Ingrid
There will be a German edition of This Kindom Will Not Kill Me, yes 🙂
I cannot confirm the publisher or their release schedule at the moment, however.
Heehee
Love you, Mod R!
Love the bedtime story ModR, I need it’s calming influence to make it through the next couple of day 😉
True story: Instead of putting more money in Jeff Bezos’ pocket, I ordered Maggie from a local independent bookstore. I got a call yesterday morning telling me the book I ordered is in, and I could come pick it up. My heart leapt. Wow, really? Started making plans. Then I thought that I really didn’t want to go there to find they wouldn’t sell it to me, so I called back.
Me: “That book isn’t supposed to be released until Tuesday.”
Bookstore: “Hmm. Let me check. … You are right. You can come pick it up Tuesday.”
Me: “If I had just come down today and not said anything would you have sold it to me?” Bookstore: “Probably.”
This is reason #2 to patronize independent bookstores – sometimes you can get stuff early!
😫😫😫😫. I would go down there very nonchalantly and ask for my book and then be prepared to beg if they said no. It’s all about strategy, my friend.
love you Mod R 💛
So fun!!!! You guys are the best😍😍.
🍾🎉🍾
“Read it again, Mod R?”
“Read it again, Mod R?”
“Read it again, Mod R?”
There! I said it three times! Now it has to happen! 😀
Such a great post. Only the 2nd Ive read since Im a new hoardling, (hoardlet?)
Not new to any of the series though, Ive read them all (most anyway)Starting with Kate when first published, so can’t imagine how hapy I am to find my way to you all. Here now dear Mod R and will be hovering over my kindle come the correct midnight and haunting the porch soon after! Can’t wait to meet Maggie..
Welcome, new hordelet, hordeling, hordekit …
Welcome to the Horde! 🎇🥳🎆
We celebrate! The Horde expands!!
so glad to see you in the BDH Hordelet, Hordeling, Hordekin…
I love this type of post. It starts my day off with a laugh. Thank you. 🤣💜
‘dushegubilly’ LMAO
Please and thank you.
I am Chalant.
Hold on! Did you say “trilogy”? Ah man, gotta w*it and practice p*tience. Good thing HA is well into Maggie 2 😉. I remember when Ilona was looking for a map maker. May the creative juices continue to flow and may the emergencies in life become far and few between.
This kind of hilarious creativity breaks my brain! Thank you so much, Mod R.
We have the best horde wrangler EVER!!! Mod R, you are amazing! 😍
Tuesday! We read at dawn!
I went to Bookshop.org to buy the ebook, in case my paperbook is delayed (no w*iting, bad bad), and I typed in “Maggie the” and Bookshop figured out what book I wanted! Thought that was the coolest thing ever. I think Bookshop is in the Horde, secretly!!
read it again, Mod R
I got sicky and reading this made me laugh and cough! Thank you for the giggles and reminder we are so very very close to release date! Release the Maggie!!!
❤️
😂😂😂
Most excellent post Mod R. Loved it.
So glad I’m retired and sleep whenever. 🙂
I received notice that my book shipped! Oh please, oh please, oh please may the mail gods look favorably on me.
Until then I have a lovely story by Mod R to read a couple more times, because … I have to w*it.
Book Goblin gives treats to her mail carrier to ensure prompt deliver of book mail. Probably not necessary, but who doesn’t like treats?
…. I thought we’d never mention Nav?! Guys come on! What happens in Nav stays in Nav!
I love how you enable us to be the best horde we can be.
This was brilliant, thanks Mod R!
🤣🤣🤣 For the HORDE!!!!!!
I was getting really excited at the thought of the book being in my hands in a few short hours, then realised that the release date is 31st, not 30th.
Boo 🙁
Oh I want Mod R to read me bedtime stories as well! ❤️
We are going skiing the Easter weekend, I hope to be able to read Maggie’s story in front of a fire place in the evenings!!
Thank you for the post Mod R! For the BDH!
This is such an odd community to be a part of, but I love the inside jokes and “Horde” stories like this one. Thanks Mod R for helping to conceptualize (and rein in) our “antics”!
Maggie Reading Checklist
* various teas and coffee
* Horde mug
* overly-full cat bowls to cut back on yowling
* divorcing hubs mostly for quiet
* various nibbles so I don’t need to cook
* sweet and yummy nibbles for tea
* snuggly blanket
* favorite chair
* comfy pjs to be worn at all hours because I won’t know sunrise from sunset
💕
Responsibly and with squees we ride!
First email I saw this morning— My book is shipped! If I didn’t have to work I would be sitting at the end of my driveway……
awwww
It’s the 31st in Australia. I have been checking My Books all day and trying to remember how far behind us the US is. At 1700 I finally Googled it and there was still another HOUR to go. I have been rereading the Innkeeper Chronicles the last few days and I’m at the last book but I will drop it like a hot potato when Maggie appears in my books. I am starting to seriously struggle with being chalant. Happy Maggie Day everyone!
Barsa! Baaarrssaaa….. BaRsa…BarSA!!